


I'll Make Her Dance

by templarsandhoes



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fluff, ME2 Timeline, ME3 Timeline, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-05
Updated: 2017-02-04
Packaged: 2018-05-04 23:57:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 31
Words: 45,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5353163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/templarsandhoes/pseuds/templarsandhoes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Commander McKenzie Shepard fell in love with Jeff Moreau, and no one is more surprised than he is.</p><p>This is going to be a string of oneshots, mostly in chronological order. I'll update the tags as I go.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hey Blondie

Flight Lieutenant Moreau watched the copy of the Normandy come to life. One hand held above his hand on the glass, he felt his heart start to race. He adjusted his hat, lifting it up and wiping the sweat starting to form on his forehead. He was beginning to feel overwhelmed; there was no way Commander McKenzie Shepard was alive. But, there was a way. He didn’t care who he allied with; he was going to see her again. There were a million things he wanted, needed to say. What could he say? _Hey, sorry you died pulling my stubborn ass out of the chair_? He still didn’t know if she would be the same, if she would even recognize him. A chill washed over him as he shook his head slightly, rejecting the thought from his body. He heard his name, and he turned around slowly. “The Commander is finishing up with The Illusive Man now, and I think he wants you to be there as soon as they’re done,” the middleman told him. Joker simply nodded, limping as he walked towards the comm room where, down just a few steps, the most important woman in his life was waiting.

He took a deep breath as he started down the stairs, the usual pain in his legs overshadowed by his nerves. He adjusted his hat one more time, quietly entering the comm room behind her. His heart skipped a beat as he saw long blonde hair cascading down black armor. It was her. As soon as The Illusive Man ended the transmission, he spoke up, his nerves gone as he felt comfortable again. For the first time in two years. “Hey, Blondie,” he called to her.

She couldn’t breathe for a second. She turned around as fast as she could, and sure enough, it was him. Her pilot. The only person she trusted with every ounce of her being. She smiled as large as her mouth allowed, and he matched it. She ran off the platform she stood on, closing the gap between the two of them in no time. She slowed nearly to a stop as she got close to him, knowing if she ran into him too hard he’d be in the med bay with a broken, well, everything. He held his arms out, and she pulled him in close. “Oh my god, Joker,” she said breathlessly to him as she hugged him as tight as his Vrolik Syndrome allowed.

“Hey, Kenzie,” he said quietly. He stood few inches taller than her, but with her full armor on, she was larger than life. She pulled away, keeping her covered hands on his shoulders. Her brown eyes stared at him, still a little shocked that he would be with Cerberus. But that didn’t matter now.

“You okay? How are you?” She asked frantically, as they started to walk back up the stairs. She always held out her hand for him, just in case. Joker would never take it, but he was glad she always offered.

“I should be asking you that, Commander. I saw you get spaced,” he said as his eyes focused on the stairs beneath him.

“I’m still figuring things out. But I feel fine. Scars kinda hurt, though,” she responded, running a finger along her cheek closest to him. His green eyes darted up. He hadn’t even noticed the scars along her cheek that almost glowed red. When he saw them, he was instantly reminded of why she had them. Why she had to be put back together. Why she was dead. He shook his head slightly. As they got to the top of the stairs, she pulled on his hand gently. He turned to look at her without hesitation. “How did you end up here, Joker?” She asked, eyes desperate for a truthful answer. As if he could ever lie to her. He looked down, then met her eyes again. He continued his walk to show her their new home.

“It all fell apart without you McKenzie. Everything you stirred up, the council just wanted it gone. Team was broken up, records sealed, and I was grounded.” He explained.

“You? Grounded? How dare they,” she teased. He chuckled slightly, and his heart soared. It wasn’t until now that he realized just how much he missed her.

“The Alliance took away the only thing that mattered to me. Hell yeah I joined Cerberus.” He lead her to the window where she would see the new ship for the first time. Her well paced steps always made him feel like he was never slowing her down. He hated be treated like a cripple, but he couldn't help but appreciate what she did for him.

“Do you really trust The Illusive Man?” She asked, curious for his opinion.

“Kenzie, I don’t trust anyone who makes more than I do,” he said, glancing at her from under his cap. She rolled her eyes, smirking as she did. “But they aren’t all bad. Saved your life. Let me fly.” He took a small step back, his own smirk growing. “And there’s this.” She looked at him, and he nodded towards the window they stood in front of. “They only told me last night,” he said to her. Her eyes widened at the sight.

The ship docked in front of them was an exact replica of the Normandy SR-1. Well, mostly exact. It was much bigger, with orange and black paint down the sides. And, of course, the Cerberus logo displayed right on the hull. Regardless, she was still thrilled she had a ship and a pilot. “It’s good to be home, huh, Commander?” He said, happy to have a ship and a commanding officer. He looked over to her, and her smile was contagious. This girl could and would smile through anything. Not that he didn’t mind the view.

“I guess we’ll have to give her a name,” she said contently. They glared at each other, and he nodded proudly.

“The Jeff Moreau SR-2 will be the best ship in the galaxy,” he joked. She threw her head back while she laughed, and he couldn’t help but laugh too. When her head came back down, a strand of hair fell in her face, and instinctively, he tucked it behind her ear for her. Then he pulled her in for another hug. “I missed you, McKenzie,” he whispered to her.

“I can’t imagine doing this with anyone else, Joker,” she reassured him. 


	2. Coffee

McKenzie walked towards the bridge, still getting used to all of the new faces she saw on the way. She might not be able to be everyone’s best friend, but she at least wanted to know everyone’s name. Garrus Vakarian was back, and she felt good knowing he had her back just as Joker did. Mordin Solus was fascinating to her, and she could listen to his stories and medical theories for hours. And she did, considering the length of his conversations. She even felt comfortable with a fully-grown, tank-bred, quote-unquote perfect krogan. Grunt was angry, sure, but he wasn’t reckless. His living space in the cargo hold was in-tact. Things were going surprisingly well. As she approached the cockpit, two mugs of coffee in her hands, she instantly relaxed upon hearing Joker’s voice reciting levels and temperatures and speeds that barely made sense to her.

He heard her footsteps, and he started to smile. He knew McKenzie was starting to feel more comfortable, and the crew was working well together. She had a way of making people sympathize with their worst enemies, so it really wasn’t a surprise when he heard whispers about how much they all liked their commanding officer. He felt her presence beside him as she leaned back against the panels that ran alongside his chair. “So the great Commander Sunshine still has time for me. Good to know,” he said as she looked out the windows above her head. She smiled, then looked down at him.

“I’ll always have time for you, Joker.” She said with a smile, passing one mug to him, before looking back up at the galaxy they passed by. “Besides, I like the view up here.”

“View certainly does get better when you’re here,” he said, surprisingly confident. They locked eyes, and she only smiled and looked down bashfully. “What? No eye roll?”

She chuckled. “I’m a changed woman, Flight Lieutenant,” she said.

“Well, hopefully you didn’t change that much,” he said, quietly. They looked at each other, their gazing lingering for longer than either of them thought. He determined very early in her command that he would never get over the small crush he developed. But, he knew she was out of his league. Way out of his league. “The leather seat may be awesome, but the coffee still sucks. I missed my coffee complaining buddy.” He noted.

“Hey, Cerberus coffee is better than the Alliance,” she offered, always trying to remain positive. He glared at her, knowing she was lying by omission. She caved, pouting slightly. “It is pretty bad isn’t it?”

“On your mission to save the galaxy, again, maybe you can find some better brew?” He asked. She smiled at him.

“Deal.”

“Good. It’s no brandy, but it’ll do,” he said as he turned his attention back to the ship he was flying. She always admired how easy he made it look. She supposed that’s why he was the best pilot in the galaxy.

“Joker, you’re not jealous of Dr. Chakwas, are you?” She said with a smile.

“Me? Jealous? Never. It’s just sometimes I don’t feel as appreciated as I feel I should be.” He said, which was met with her laughter.

“I’m glad to see your ego has remained in tact all these years.” He smiled proudly in response. She stood up straight, gently placing a hand on his shoulder. “You get coffee, not booze. I need my pilot awake, not drunk.” She said as she walked back down.

“I’d still be a damn good pilot drunk,” he called back to her.

“Let’s not test that anytime soon, okay?” She said without looking back. He chuckled in his seat, happiness filling him. They were going through the motions of their old routine; coffee together on the bridge, discussing previous missions, her rolling her eyes at his jokes, him making her laugh. It was familiar to him, and after too long, it was coming back. He realized he was sleeping better, that he was flying better than he ever had. McKenzie Shepard really was the best thing to ever happen to him, and that scared the shit out of him.


	3. Don't Stop Talking

Sitting in the shuttle alone, the nerves in McKenzie’s body were quickly filling her stomach and chest. She wasn’t necessarily afraid of heights. But the MSV Estevanico was a gentle breeze away from sliding down a massive cliff. And she had to scale it to try and find out what happened to the men and women aboard the ship. She secured her helmet as the shuttle arrived at the wreck. Her deep breath wasn’t as steady as she had hoped. The shuttle came to a stop and she carefully climbed out. The sound of creaking metal filtered through her helmet, a sound that was unsettling to say the least. The shuttle retreated, and she was alone. On top of the wreck. She took another shaky breath. 

She started walking carefully, wanting to disturb the wreck as little as possible. Her breathing resonated in her ears, her heart beating in her throat. “Shit,” she said, under her breath. She paused. “Hey, Joker.” 

“Yeah, what’s up?” he answered after a few moments. 

“Can you, uh. Can you just… talk to me,” she asked. 

“What do you want me to say?”

“Just anything.” 

“Contrary to popular beliefs, I don’t have a crap ton of jokes just waiting,” he said. 

“Joker this is probably the only time I won’t tell you to shut up,” she said quickly. “Just please. This is fucking terrifying.” She started walking again. 

“Alright. Promise you won’t tell me to shut up or tell me I’m being obnoxious or annoying or-” 

“This is your free pass, Joker. Just… don’t stop talking to me,” she begged. She approached a narrow beam, and took a deep breath as she stepped onto it. 

“So…uh…” 

“Not helping,” she said, nervously. She quickly made her way across the beam. 

“Jesus, Kenz. You’re bossy when you’re scared.” She was about to comment back when the whole wreck creaked loudly. What was left of the ship began to lean over the cliff. 

“Oh shit,” she said, freezing in her place. Still on top of the wreck, she made the mistake of looking below. 

“Are you okay?” he asked. She could tell he was worried by the way he asked. When the wreck tilted back up, she took a deep breath. 

“Yeah, yeah. Just saw my life flash before my eyes, but I’m good.” 

“Please don’t die again.” 

“I’m trying. Although I distinctly remember asking you to talk to me.” 

“What are we doing right now?”

“Okay, fair point,” she said with a small smile. She stood up straight, and started making her way towards the mainframe again. 

“I spy with my little eye…” 

“Are you serious?” She chuckled slightly. Looking for her next move, she took out the pistol she was unfamiliar with. She didn’t need weapons on this mission, and certainly didn’t want to add to the weight she was putting on the metal frame. 

“Don’t tell me you hate ‘I Spy’,” he said. She looked up at a loose panel, and decided to take her chances and shoot it down. She fired, hitting the metal panel towards the top. It fell, creating a makeshift bridge to the other side of the wreck. 

“It’s just a little unfair,” she noted. The wreck creaked again, and she swallowed hard. 

“How is it unfair?” 

“I can’t exactly look around while I’m doing this. Unless you want me falling off.” 

“Fine. No ‘I Spy’. How about… oh. How about ‘Never Have I Ever’?” he asked. 

“Isn’t that a drinking game?” she asked. She was making steady progress, and her nerves were slowly being dulled. 

“We can keep track and then drink when you get back.” 

“Deal. You first,” she said. 

“Never have I ever walked on a shipwreck on a giant-ass cliff,” he said, his tone dry. 

“Son of a bitch,” she muttered. His chuckle came through her radio and she smiled. She found herself standing in front of another narrow beam. Carefully, she walked across it. Slow and steady. “Alright. Never have I ever flown the Normandy.” 

“Never have I ever been the Commanding Officer of the Normandy,” he quickly replied. She stepped off the beam onto the slightly steadier panel below her. 

“Okay, okay. Never have I ever…” her voice trailed off as she thought of what to say next. “Kissed someone and regretted it.” 

“Shit, I have.” 

“Do tell,” she insisted. She was getting close to the mainframe. And she was damn happy about it. 

He sighed. “It was a dare during flight school.” 

“So that’s what flight school is like? Zipping across the galaxy and kissing people?” She chuckled slightly as she finished. A piece of debris fell from the frame, making her jump slightly. 

“Makes you wish you went to flight school, huh?” 

“Maybe. But then I probably would have been the Normandy’s pilot,” she said. The mainframe was in sight, and the whole wreck was beginning to slide. She had to be quick. 

“I don’t even want to think about that,” he said. The creaking metal was suddenly blaring through her helmet, and she fell over when the frame started to fall. “Kenz?” he asked. She looked towards the incoming shuttle, then scrambled to her feet. Her pistol fell, but she simply ran towards the shuttle. “Holy crap, she’s gonna die,” she heard him say. Suddenly, she felt herself on the floor of the shuttle. She was alive and unharmed. 

“Fuck you, Joker. I was not going to die.”

“Can’t be too sure with you,” he said. She heard him sigh. 

“Shut up,” she said, moving to a sitting position. They both laughed. “Thank you,” she said, her voice quiet. 

“You’re welcome.” 

“You lost, by the way.” 

“I demand a rematch. And we’re drinking next time, too. It’s stressful being your pilot sometimes.” 

“I’m game,” she said, laughing. 


	4. Rain Storm

There were only a few times Joker didn’t like to hear the mission McKenzie was on. She had the ability to smile through anything, the toughest missions never without jokes or wisecracks. Horizon, though. He heard her find colonists in some weird Collector stasis, heard her fight more husks than she probably would have liked. And he heard her talk to Ashley. Heard the hurt in Ash’s voice when she realized who they were working with. He never felt as helpless as he did in that moment. Kenzie could handle herself, and she did. And while she sounded angry, he knew she was hurt. No matter how close she got with the Cerberus crew, they didn’t know her like he did. 

He inhaled sharply as he heard her approach the bridge. “Tell me you heard all of that,” she begged. She sounded angry. 

“Crazy the kind of people you can run into out here,” he said, swinging his chair towards the seat next to him. He knew she was going to sit down, but he wasn’t sure what she was going to say. Sure enough, she sat down hastily, crossing her arms. She looked towards him, spinning her chair as well. Her eyes softened after a few moments, a deep sigh escaping her lips. 

“Shit,” she said. He gave her a half chuckle. 

“Yeah… you sure you’re okay?” 

“I guess, I don’t know,” she said, her voice tired. “I honestly didn’t know if I would even see her, but this wasn’t the reaction I was expecting.” 

“Hey, not everyone is loyal as hell like me,” he said. It was her turn to chuckle. 

“You’re one of a kind, Joker,” she teased, a smile appearing on her face. 

“Now you’re sounding like my mom.”

“We don’t want that, do we?” she asked, and if Jeff wasn’t mistaken, that almost sounded like flirting. He grinned, but it quickly faded.  _ Don’t start _ , his thoughts threatened. 

“Seriously. You sure you’re going to be alright? No promises I can help if you start crying or something,” he said. She chuckled again. 

“Alright, no crying.” 

“Good. Besides, we need Commander Sunshine to-” 

“God, stop calling me that,” she said. 

“Why?”

“It’s a lot to live up to. Besides, I’m just McKenzie to you, okay?” she informed him. His heart started to beat faster. She only told one other person not to call her that. She told Jenkins not to call her that, and that she was just ‘Shepard’ to him. 

“Alright, alright. Commander Rainstorm it is,” he said, turning his chair back towards the controls. While he didn’t hate having EDI on board as much as he did, he still didn’t like letting her take control for more than a few minutes at a time. Plus, he didn’t want to look at her anymore. He had to control the blush spreading across his cheeks. 

“No, I think you’re the rainstorm around here,” she said, hey eyes focused on the ends of her hair. Her impossibly long hair. Perfectly straight without needing a flat iron or chemical treatment to make it that way. He scrunched his nose up.  _ What did I say _ , he thought. 

“If I’m a rainstorm, does that make Garrus a blizzard?” She laughed. 

“No, turians don’t like cold. Trust me. Garrus said that a hundred times back on Noveria,” she said. 

“And I’m pretty sure you complained about him complaining to me,” he said. 

“You know, you claim not to be a people person,” she started. There was no hiding his blushing now. “But you sure do help me with my problems a lot,” she said, a playful smile on her face. He looked towards her, a mistake he made against his better judgement. She was so beautiful, and it seemed as if she didn’t even realize it. Either she was ignoring the red on his cheeks, or his beard was hiding it better than he had hoped. 

“Yeah, well. Don’t let it get to your head, alright?”

“I won’t,” she said with a smile, her eyes again paying attention to the ends of her hair in her hands. He struggled to take his eyes off of her, and just as he was about to turn back, her eyes met his. He stared at her, her gaze making him weak. She giggled quietly as she looked away, her blushing cheeks facing him. He couldn’t believe that she was blushing, there was no way she was the one blushing after that. He looked back to the controls, flipping through display after display. He passed the one he was looking for, his mind not completely focused. 

“Alright, now that you’re all smiley again,” he said, another laugh coming from her. “Where to next?” 

“Umm… Give me a few minutes and I’ll let you know,” she said as she stood up. As much as he wanted her to stay, she needed to leave to he could breath easy, if only for a few minutes. 

“Sounds good,” he said. He listened to her leave, his eyes never leaving the screen in front of him. He suddenly felt her next to him. Before he could even turn to look at her, she was leaned over, kissing his cheek. 

“Thank you,” she whispered. A chill ran down his back, and he swore he nearly jumped when he felt her lips on his skin. 

“Anytime, Commander,” he said as she walked away. 

“What did I just say?” She called back, turning around as she did. 

“Hey, I didn’t say the S word.” 

“Whatever,” she muttered, not sounding annoyed in the least. 

He sat in his chair, dumbfounded. He was imaging things, or maybe this was some kind of stress response because of what just happened on Horizon. He couldn’t let himself believe that she was flirting with him. Not with him falling harder for her every damn day. “Out of everyone to get the hots for, you pick her,” he scolded himself. He sighed, looking at the chair she had just left. Dragging his eyes back towards the controls, he started to prepare the Normandy for a mass relay jump. Flying was the only thing that could distract him. And he needed the distraction, now more than ever. 


	5. Very Smart

The chair next to Joker was occupied, and while he was focused on the monitors in front of him, his peripheral vision was filled with blonde hair. Pulling away from the Migrant Fleet, he heard McKenzie take a deep breath. “You good?” he asked. 

“Yeah, I’m good. And I think Tali’s good, too,” she answered. She took a sip of her coffee, turning her head slightly to look towards him. They heard footsteps. Gentle footsteps. 

“Joker, you should have seen Shepard in there,” Tali said. Both Joker and McKenzie smiled. Tali took a few more steps, standing behind Joker’s chair. 

“Yeah, how exactly did you manage to clear Tali’s name?” 

“First, she talked me up and got the crowd on my side. I don’t think we would have been able to retake the Alarei if she hadn’t,” the quarian explained. 

“Wow, McKenzie is convincing. Who knew?” Joker replied. He was met with an eyeroll from McKenzie. She was still grinning though, taking another sip from her coffee. 

“Hey, it was the truth. They shouldn’t have had your ship name taken away.” 

“Anyway, she talked to the admirals before we boarded the Alarei. They were all surprisingly honesty with her,” she explained. McKenzie rotated the seat so she faced them. 

“Can I be honest?” she asked. Tali nodded, a slight chuckle escaping her mask. “They’re all kind of assholes. Like, I talked to them for just a few minutes each and it was very clear that putting Tali on trial had nothing to do with her.” 

“McKenzie, I generally think you’re very smart,” Joker added in. 

“But?”

“But if you are shocked by a politician being an asshole…” 

“Hey, I was surprised,” Tali added in. 

“Great. Now I’m the bad guy,” he said, quietly. 

“I think you’re generally very smart, Joker,” McKenzie said, giggles littering her sentence. He grinned, slowly shaking his head. 

“You didn’t even hear the best part,” Tali said. Joker looked at McKenzie, who was smiling at him. She looked towards Tali. 

“They were starting the hearing already, just assuming we didn’t survive,” McKenzie started. “We walk into the hearing just as they were going to vote and Tali goes, ‘Sorry we’re late’.” McKenzie put her hand on her hip, trying her best to imitate the attitude Tali had. Joker didn’t take his eyes off of her, and the smile he wore was bigger than before. Tali giggled, the sound making McKenzie smile wide. 

“Joker, she yelled at the Admirals until they found me innocent.” 

“You did what?” He looked at McKenzie, his eyes wide. She bit her lip. 

“Gave them this big speech about how the trial wasn’t about me, and how I helped her take down Saren,” Tali explained. He knew she was smiling behind that mask. 

“Shit, Kenz. You really can do anything. Also, if I ever need a lawyer, I’m calling you,” he said. 

“I’m just glad that everything worked out, honey,” McKenzie said to Tali. The way McKenzie’s voice sounded when she used a pet name made Joker’s heart skip a beat. Then he focused all of his attention back on the ship. His cheeks were burning, his heart rate steadily climbing. The two women chatted more about the trial, and he tried his best not to look at her again. Her laughter filled his ear, and he nearly pushed a wrong button. He took a deep breath. McKenzie’s omni-tool beeped. She opened it, her eyes darting across the incoming message. “Garrus wants to talk. Hopefully it’s about Sidonis,” she said, spinning the chair around and standing up. She placed her hand on Joker’s shoulder gently, a silent goodbye. His skin tingled at the contact. 

“Maybe you can yell at him until he realizes you were right,” Tali said. They both laughed, leaving the bridge, and Joker, behind them. As soon as he couldn’t hear them anyway, he slouched in his seat, rubbing his eyes. He was screwed, completely in love with her. 

“I hate you,” he said under his breath. His words partly true; he hated what she was doing to him. But as he sat back up, straightened his back, he suddenly missed her presence next to him. “Yep, I’m fucked.” 


	6. Little Black Dress

McKenzie adjusted the dress she had just put on. Kasumi had bought it for her, and she was going to get a second use out of it trying to seduce Morinth. Or trying to get seduced by Morinth. She shook her hair, letting it fall over her shoulders. One more look over her makeup, which was heavier than normal. Well, heavier than she had worn in the past few years.

Her time on Earth started flashing before her eyes, all the time spent in shifty clubs with even shorter dresses than this. The task she had to complete today was not all that unique to her. Go into a club, try and get invited home with someone for information or guns or whatever. Old news for McKenzie, who had spent years doing things just like this for the Reds. She never thought she'd have to do something like this again. Then again, needing to get invited into the home of an Ardat-Yakshi was something she never had to do on Earth. As with everything in her current life, the stakes were extremely high.

She sat on the bed, slipping on her heels. A wave of confidence poured through her. Flashbacks to her old life threatened to manifest, but she pushed them away. Both heels were on her feet, and she ran her fingers through her hair. One deep breath as she stood up.

Walking to the door was easier than she thought. McKenzie could sprint in stilettos if she had to, but she was still worried about being rusty. There were plenty of other things to be worried about, as well. She rode the elevator down, back against the cold metal. She could hear the crew chattering as the elevator doors slowly opened on Deck 2. Another deep breath as she stepped out of the doors.

Not too many people turned around to look, but a few did. And their stares and gaped mouths made her chuckle. She walked to her terminal quickly, wanting to check if there was any messages for her before she left. Kelly looked over, and Kenzie heard her gasp quietly. “Commander, you look beautiful,” she said, her hand moving to her chest. McKenzie smiled.

“Aw, thanks Kelly,” she responded, feeling a blush forming in her cheeks. Thank God she used enough blush to hide any change in her skin tone. “Alright, I’m off. Hopefully Samara’s plan works,” she said, shutting down her terminal.

“Yes, good luck. We’ll all be waiting for you to come back,” she said. Kenzie smiled at her, then walked up the bridge, towards Joker. _Oh, no_ , she thought. _Joker’s going to see me like this_. She slowed her stride, but then the corner of her lip perked up. _Joker’s going to see me like this_ , she thought, sounding more positive. She walked with more confidence towards the bridge, the sound of her heels clicking against the ground more forceful than they were before. She saw him turn the chair around slowly.

“Hey, if you get eaten or whatever, do I get…” he trailed off. The chair was fully spun around now and his eyes were wide. She smiled wide, a small giggle leaving her lips.

“Do you get what? Also I wouldn’t get eaten, I don’t think,” she said, taking the remaining steps. She leaned against the wall that separated the bridge from the rest of the ship, separated Joker from everyone else.

“Shepard is correct. The hunting patterns of Ardat-Yakshi do not typically involve eating their victims,” EDI said.

“Thanks, EDI. See Joker, no need to worry,” Kenzie said, eyes dancing between the blue globe and the pilot. She saw him swallow harshly, caught his eyes dragging up and down her body. She shifted her weight, hips dramatically coming into contact with the wall. Joker cleared his throat. “Come on, Joker. Don’t tell me you’ve never seen a girl in a dress before,” she teased. He cracked a smile, then quickly turned his chair back around. She laughed, moving to the side of his chair where she frequently stands. “You know, when you don’t make a smartass comment for thirty seconds, I get worried about your health,” she said. Her dress rode up slightly as she leaned against the panelling. A faux-pa she did not feel like fixing.

“Aren’t you supposed to be seducing Samara’s daughter right now,” he said, focusing on the displays in front of him. Kenzie chuckled, her voice low.

“I figured I’d practice on you, first.” He groaned quietly, and she knew he was rolling his eyes under his hat. “Ok, but seriously. Do you think it’s too much?” she asked, looking herself over once more. He reluctantly looked at her, green eyes staring at her hips, and moving down her legs.  

“Can you run away in those things if you’re about to get eaten?”

“I’m sorry, is that doubt I hear in your voice?” she asked, her sarcastic tone making him chuckle. “Joker, are you doubting my ability to run in high heels?”

“How would I know that you can run in heels? It’s not like you parade around in them all the time,” he explained. He managed to look up to her.

“Maybe I should start,” she said. He shook his head as he looked away from her again. “Can’t have you doubting me,” she added, the chuckle she added at the end of her sentence drawing Joker’s eyes back to her.

“Yeah. Maybe this should be your new uniform. I think my morale would go up,” he said, a smug grin appearing on his face. She laughed loudly.

“There he is,” she said. She stood tall, fixing her dress slowly. She stopped suddenly when she felt his eyes on her thigh. Reaching over, she pulled his hat down, covering his eyes. They both laughed as he brought his hand to his head to adjust it.

“Good luck,” he said as she walked away. She was about to exit the airlock when she turned around to face him one more time.

“Thanks. And yes. If I do get eaten or whatever, you can have the Normandy,” she said. He turned his head, watching her leave the ship.

“Sweet!” he called after her. She laughed again, the door to the airlock closing behind her. She took a deep breath; her heart rate was suddenly climbing, her blushing cheeks burning. She flipped open her omni-tool, checking to see if Samara was in place.She originally wanted to mess with Joker, make her nerves calm down before she became bait for a dangerous killer. Instead, here she stood outside of her ship, giggling like a schoolgirl who got noticed by her crush. She took another deep breath, and her tool beeped. Samaras was ready, and McKenzie was, too. Although, the giant grin on her face might have made her slightly less mysterious. _This might have been a bad idea_ , she thought. She knew that was a lie. It was worth every second.


	7. Am I Going Crazy?

McKenzie made her way to the MedBay, a feeling in her stomach that only Dr. Chakwas could cure. Of course, it wasn’t an illness that needed treating. _Stupid heart_ , she thought as the elevator dropped. The doors opened, and she took a deep breath as she walked out and went to find Karin. She was sitting at her desk, which relieved McKenzie. She wouldn’t interrupt her. “Got a minute, Doc?” She asked as she nervously made her way in. Karin Chakwas spun around in her chair.

“Always, Commander. What’s going on?”

“I just need to… talk to you about … something.” Kenzie spoke nervously, the thought of being in love with Jeff scaring her to death. “EDI, you think you could give us some privacy?” Karin looked at her, her eyes widening slightly. She leaned back in her chair, crossing one of her legs over the other.

“Yes, Commander. Disabling surveillance systems now.” EDI replied.

“So this little chat is off the record?” Chakwas asked with an eyebrow raised. The Commander let out an exasperated sigh.

“Am I going crazy? Have you noticed anything weird about me lately?” She practically spat out.

“Medically, you’re fine. And your last psych eval came back fine. Why? Do _you_ think you’re going crazy?”

“Gosh, I don’t know. I just…” she trailed off. She fidgeted her fingers, searching for the right words. “I hate having feelings sometimes…”

“Shepard, you’ve never resented your compassion, before. All of us agree that it’s one of your best qualities.” She tried reassuring McKenzie. But, deep down, Karin knew that it was her compassion for the pilot that was bothering her.

McKenzie looked down, a small smile appearing. “Thank you, but maybe I am too nice. Maybe being friends with everyone wasn’t a good idea.”

“Is there a particular crew member you think you shouldn’t have become friends with?”

“I...um,” Kenzie stammered out.

“I _have_ noticed you and Joker spending more time together than you ever had before. And he was very concerned about you after Horizon.” The Doctor stated, her tone almost accusatory. Kenzie felt her cheeks growing pink.

“He was. Seeing Ash threw me off a little.”

“And he was right there to steady you,” she said. McKenzie looked down. “Yeoman Chambers even noted that he goes up to your cabin to sleep sometimes.”

“Okay, he was complaining that his bunk wasn’t good for his back so I offered him mine. When I wasn’t using it.” She quickly made excuses. “I’ve never been up there with him. And besides, we all need him as well-rested as possible.”

“Fair enough. You trust him to be alone in your cabin?” She asked.

“Yes. I do. I should, right? I mean we’ve been through a lot together and I…” Her breath started to get short.

“You certainly have.” She said. She put down her leg, and stood up to walk towards her. “Commander, you’ve never been this uncertain..” She started.

“He’s driving me insane.” McKenzie said, covering her face with her hands.

“That’s Jeff for you,” the Doctor replied. They both laughed. “You two are quite the pair. I know you care for him a great deal, but you’re the only one who can decide if...pursuing this would be beneficial.”

“Is it in my head, though? I mean, is it possible that he would…” she started, unwilling to finish. There were few things in the galaxy that terrified her more than a broken heart.

“That’s not my place to say,” Karin said, a smile growing on her lips.

“Suddenly I wish we hadn’t finished that brandy…” McKenzie said. They both laughed quietly. They looked at each other, and Kenzie sighed.

“Commander, I am confident that you will figure this out.” She said, placing her hands on the blonde’s shoulders.

“Thank you. I’m just…” she started.

“Scared?”

“Terrified.”

Karin gave her a reassuring smile, and Kenzie felt comforted. “No one said you couldn’t be. In fact, it’s good to know that there’s something in this galaxy that scares you.”

“And that something is Joker.” Kenzie replied.

“Maybe you are going crazy,” Karin stated dryly. They laughed loudly, and Karin pulled McKenzie in for a hug. “I’m always here for you, Commander.”

“Thank you,” she said, squeezing her just a bit tighter. She let go, and immediately started walking out. “Hey, EDI. Is that Reaper IFF ready yet?”

“Yes, Commander. Although it needs to be tested first.” The AI replied. 


	8. Answer Me

McKenzie sat with her head in her lap in a crowded shuttle. The fact that the Normandy was attacked by Collectors again was not surprising. What was making her worried was the fact that she still hadn’t heard from Jeff. EDI informed her that he was safe, but she still hadn’t heard his voice. “Joker..” she said quietly, hoping that he would respond. She was shaking, and the entire shuttle was speechless, for once. Kasumi and Tali were seated on either side of their Commander. Tali placed her hand on Kenzie’s shoulder, unsure of what to do exactly. “I should have been there. Dammit,” she said, standing up abruptly. Her gauntlets were on the ground, and she was slowly taking off her armor, piece by piece. She chewed on her fingernails.

“Joker clearly handled it, Shepard. There’s no need to worry,” Garrus offered.

“If you count losing the entire crew and unshackling an AI as ‘handling it’,” Miranda said.

“He kept the ship together. It’s better than I did against the Collectors,” McKenzie said, flipping open her omni-tool. “Dammit, Joker. Answer me.” She said under her breath. She paced as much as she could in the shuttle. She waited for an answer. The shuttle ride felt like it was taking longer than it should. She felt her companion’s eyes on her, but they looked away whenever she turned around.

“If it helps, we can punch Garrus,” Grunt offered.

“What the-” Garrus answered. McKenzie laughed slightly.

“Thank you Grunt. But no, it won’t help,” she said, the worry immediately coming back. She paced to the back of the shuttle, lifting her arm above her, leaning on it. “Jeff. Answer me. Please.” Her voice cracked. “I can’t do this without you. Please.”

“You won’t have to.” His voice suddenly was in her ear, and she gasped.

“Joker?!” She said quickly.

“When you called me Jeff I had to stop you. Too mushy for me,” he said. Her jaw dropped, and made an exasperated noise.

“You were just listening to me?!” She said, taken aback, but still relieved. She hid her smile under her hand.

“A guy wonders sometimes, you know? Just how far will she go for me…” he said.

“God, you’re such a dick sometimes.” She said. She heard him laugh.

“Hey, Tali.” He said. “Tell me something.”

“Uh, sure.” Tali said, confused. She and McKenzie looked at each other.

“Is she smiling right now?” He asked. Kenzie immediately tried to wipe the smile from her face. Jacob and Garrus both laughed, watching her try to hide her joy.

“She’s doing that thing where she’s trying not to smile,” she said, her voice getting higher. She giggled as she finished.

“Good. I’ll see you when you get back,” he said, and with a click the line went dead. McKenzie made a face at Tali.

“Sold out by Tali’Zorah. I’ll remember that,” she said, her smile coming back in full force.

“I’m glad you’re happy and all, but we need to discuss our strategy-” Miranda started, but was cut off by McKenzie.

“I need to find out what happened first. Then we discuss our next move.” She said, sternly. _I need to make sure he’s really okay_ , she thought. She gathered her discarded armor off the floor of the shuttle as they approached the Normandy. Everyone made sure the door was clear and that she would be the first one off. She waited impatiently for the shuttle to safely land in the shuttle bay, taking off as much of her armor that she would be able to hold in her hands. In a blur, she was off the shuttle, stripping herself of the rest of her armor. She grabbed her uniform and ran into the elevator. “Where is he?” She asked the AI.

“Mister Moreau is in the Comm Room,” she responded. McKenzie quickly pushed the corresponding buttons on the elevator and waited for no one to enter with her. She dressed herself as the elevator ascended, but the doors opened before she closed her shirt. She didn’t care; she needed to see him as fast as possible. She wouldn’t be bothered with her shirt not being closed. As she looked up before running out of the elevator, she froze for a second. Rarely was there a time when she saw the Normandy with absolutely no one. It sent a chill through her. She quickly went through the doors on her right, then snaked her way back to the Comm Room.

The doors opened, and Joker looked up to see McKenzie running in, blonde hair bouncing as she did. He sighed and took off his hat, but stayed sitting on the large conference table. He couldn’t help but smile when she came in, and his smile grew when he noticed she hadn’t completely dressed yet. “So a Collector attack is what it takes to see you in your bra…” he notes. She rolled her eyes.

“You’re such a dick,” she said as she brought her hands up to his face.

“You mentioned that.”

“Are you… I’m…” She said, staring at him, struggling to find the words. “EDI does he have any fractures or anything?” She asked, not looking away from him. It was his turn to roll his eyes.

“I would not be able to tell,” EDI replied.

“I’m fine, Kenzie. Promise.” He said, bringing his hand up to hers. He could see her eyes starting to water, but he froze.

“Okay,” she said softly. They heard the elevator doors open again, and she went to button up her shirt.

“I’m sorry I lost the crew,” he whispered to her as he carefully got down from the table, placing his hat back on his head.

“We can get them back. You did better than I did, Jeff.” She said, and looked back up at him. They stood dangerously close to each other, but neither of them moved away. Before he could give her a sarcastic remark, Miranda came into the room. It was a few seconds before he stopped looking at Kenzie, and replied to the woman yelling at him.

McKenzie almost didn’t pay attention to the conversation that played out in front of her. She stepped in to defend Jeff, but did little else. She stood close to him. The other crew members all left the room, although she couldn’t recall who else besides Miranda had come in. Jeff placed his hand on her shoulder, his touch bringing her out of her daze. “Lemme know when you wanna hit the relay, alright?” He said, then moved away from her. Her feet were frozen, not letting her follow. She watched him leave, and took a deep breath. _Now or never_ , she thought.


	9. First Things First

McKenzie laid in bed, unable to shut her eyes. She knew she should rest before they hit the Omega-4 Relay, but her mind couldn’t stop racing. She read and reread datapads with emails and reports, but she wasn’t retaining any information. She had already checked on her remaining crew, making sure they were all ready. There was nothing more for her to do except relax, but she still felt like there was something she needed to do. She shook her head, trying to ignore the thought from her mind. _I shouldn’t distract him_ , she thought. She decided she wouldn’t talk to Jeff, would just leave him be. But as soon as she told herself to stay upstairs, she immediately found herself leaving her room and going down to get coffee. Two cups.

Joker went through the motions of piloting the Normandy, her controls second nature to him. He was trying his best to remain calm, checking and double checking all of the systems aboard. He thought about her. Seeing McKenzie after the Collector attack was comforting, more so than he ever thought. He was glad he saw her first, and they had a few moments alone. It wasn’t until just then that he realized that their moment lasted a little longer. He took a deep breath. _Would she have wanted the moment to last longer_ , he thought. If this had happened on the SR-1, he would be laughing at himself for thinking that. But now, now things were different. He had hope, which was dangerous. He was pulled from his thoughts when he heard the elevator door open. His heart started to race when he heard small footsteps coming towards the bridge.

She held two coffee cups in her hands, the feeling familiar. The only difference was the quiet. Her bare feet were louder than she liked. She wore leggings and an oversized Cerberus t-shirt, figuring that if she were about to lead a suicide mission, she could be comfortable in the hours leading up to it. She quietly approached him. “Coffee?” She asked.

He smiled, taking off his hat. He started doing that more around her. “I thought I was going to have to go bring some up to you,” he said.

She moved to her normal spot on his right, leaning against the panels. “I’m not leaving you hanging just yet,” she said. She smiled softly as she passed him his cup.

“You lead one suicide mission and you think you get to dress however you want?” He teased, looking her up and down. He racked his brain trying to think if he’s ever seen her out of uniform.

“I think I’ve earned it. You get to chose your last meal, I chose my last outfit,” she said. She looked down at herself, suddenly feeling insecure. “Pretty lame last outfit, I guess,” she said with a sigh.

He chuckled, and looked up at her. “It looks good.” They shared a smile, then she looked up at the window. He blew over the top of the cup, and watched her. “You okay?” He asked, getting the feeling she was nervous.

Without looking at him, she stated, “I’m scared.” She took a deep breath, then looked down at him. His dark hair was short, but still had some curl to it. She liked him without his hat. She was finding more and more things about him she liked; the way he made her laugh, how his nose gets scrunched up when he’s frustrated, his smile, his eyes. Her heart started to race. She put down her coffee so she didn’t spill it. He did the same, and then held up his hand to her. She took it and he pulled it towards him. She smiled as she took a step towards him.

“Come here,” he said quietly, then guided her into the chair with him. She sat down in between his legs, gently leaning back against his chest. She made sure her hair was in front of her shoulder.

“I’m not hurting you, am I?” She asked as she got comfortable. He chuckled as he slid his arms around her stomach.

“I’ll let you know if you hurt me,” he practically whispered into her ear. They both took a deep breath when they got comfortable. Her head fell back onto his left shoulder, allowing him to still see the consoles and screens in front of him. He realized just how much her hair smelled like flowers. Of course she didn’t use the Cerberus-issued shampoo.

“Can you do me a favor?” She asked, her voice quieter than he’s ever heard.

“Anything.”

“If I ever ask you to follow me into hell again, please say no.” She pleaded. He chuckled again, and she placed her hands on top of his.

“I’m afraid I can’t do that, Kenzie. You’re stuck with me,” he said. She loudly exhaled. She thought back to her talk with Dr. Chakwas.

“We definitely are quite the pair,” she quoted.

He sucked in a breath. “Did Chakwas tell you that, too?”

She turned her head slightly, craning her neck to look at him. He was starting to blush, and Kenzie felt her own cheeks growing red. He smiled as he brought up one of his arms, draping it across her shoulder. He pulled her closer to him, and she laughed into his collarbone. His other hand moved idly along her back, his fingers leaving a ghostly trail on her skin. She looked back up at him. “What are we going to do,” she said, turning her body slightly so she could look at him better without straining her neck.

“Well,” he said while he exhaled. “First things first, we’re getting through the Omega-4 Relay and we’re going to destroy a collector base and rescue the crew,” he said.

“You seem very confident about that.”

“I’m the best pilot in the galaxy.” He proclaimed, which was met with her laughter. He smiled as waited for her to stop. “Plus, you’re the best Commander in the galaxy. If there’s anyone that can do this, it’s us.” She smiled and dropped her head to his shoulder.

“I guess you’re right.” She said. She adjusted her feet slightly so they hung over the side of the chair. He rested his arm across her thigh. They adjusted to each other as if they had sat together in his chair a hundred times before.

“I know I’m right,” he said, which earned him an eye roll. “Seriously, Kenz. You’re a great commander. You’re smart. You are merciful….usually,” he said. She giggled. “You can handle yourself, you look good while you shoot bastards,” he said quickly. She held her head up and her mouth was slightly agape.

“What was that last one?” She asked, a smile creeping on her face. Jeff felt his cheeks getting red again.

“You...can handle yourself,” he said.

“No, that wasn’t the last one…” she said, laughs littering her voice. He felt his heart flutter.

“You look good. Most of the time,” he said, his voice trailing off at the end. Her mouth opened again, and she scoffed. Before she could squirm away, he pulled her tight to him, saying, “Fine fine, you’re very pretty. Is that what you wanted to hear?” She smiled at him. “You’re so beautiful,” he said, his voice low and breathy.

“Jeff, I…” she started. His hand cradled her neck, thumb brushing along her chin. She licked her lips. They moved their lips closer together, closing their eyes as they did. Without any more hesitation, they pressed their lips together. They both nearly froze, the sensation of their connected lips making both of their heart rate increase. She brought her hand up to the back of his head gently, and she deepened the kiss. Parting her lips slightly, he mimicked her, kissing her soft lips as if he would never get the chance to again. Her other hand came up to his cheek, his beard tickling her hand slightly. They kissed for a few more seconds. He leaned into her, and she leaned back. When she felt like she was going to fall, she pulled her lips away. His eyes were still closed as she pushed him back lightly.  The hand that cradled her neck moved to her back, pulling her back towards him. She smiled, and they pressed their foreheads together. “Jeff, I think I love you,” she admitted. He kissed her quick.

As he pulled away, he looked at her and said, “McKenzie, I know I love you.” She kissed him gently, and he lifted her and moved her into his lap. She pulled her lips away and buried her face in the crook of his neck. He held her hips, taking a deep breath as she got settled. “All it takes a suicide mission for you to admit you love me?” He asked.

She laughed, and looked at him. “I like to keep you on your toes.”

“Keep me on my toes long enough and I’ll break them.”

“We just made out and you are bringing up broken toes?” She said, leaning back slightly.

“Because this was the epitome of romance. ‘Making out’ in my chair.” He said, making air quotes.

“I take what I can get,” she said, kissing his cheek.

“Beard doesn’t bother you?” He asked.

“Trust me, you would have already known if I didn’t like your beard,” she said. He smiled, and she matched it. “I thought you said the first thing we do was go through the relay…”

“What relay…” he said, suddenly pulling her head closer to him with his lips puckered. She giggled, and kept giggling as they kissed again. She pulled back, smiling at him. “Maybe you should have waited until after we went through the relay before you finally admitted you love me.”

“What do you mean ‘I finally admitted’,” she scoffed. She pushed one of his legs off the chair, and lifted herself up slightly using the arms of the chair for balance. She turned around and faced him on her knees. “You wanted to do this just as much as I wanted to.”

He chuckled. “Nah, I mean…” he started, trying to evade her statement. She grabbed his cheeks and forced him to look at her.

“When did you talk to Chakwas?” She asked.

“When did _you_ talk to Chakwas?” He replied.

“Nope, we’re not playing this game. And if you’re not honest with me I’m not kissing you ever again,” she said, dropping her hands from his face and gently placing them on his chest.

He groaned and rolled his eyes. “Uhhhh, right after Horizon.”

“Hah. I talked to her yesterday,” she said.

“Yeah, well. How long did you wait to talk to her about it?” He asked with a shit-eating grin on his face. She pouted her lips slightly, her cheeks turning red. He opened his mouth wider as the hue increased in her face.

“You’re an ass,” she said, covering her face.

“And you’ve got a nice one,” he said as he slid his hands over her ass. She placed her hands on either side of his head to steady herself. She was about to lower her lips to his again, when one of the sensors behind her beeped. They both froze and stared at each other. He gulped and tapped her hip lightly. She got up from the chair and stood next to him, watching him scroll through. “Looks like we’ll in range of the relay in 45.” They both took a deep breath.

“Alright. I’ll go up and change.”

“Let’s show these Collectors who’s the most badass couple in the galaxy,” he said, grabbing her hand and placing a kiss on the back of it.

“Did we make this official? Or did I just miss the memo” She said, a teasing smile on her face.

“We’ll make it official after we kick some Collector ass,” he said, adjusting his position in the chair.

“I’m gonna hold you to that,” she said, walking away. She heard him mumble something as she walked, but she simply smiled. She was relieved and happy and had another reason to stay alive during this mission.


	10. Did We Just Make This Official?

Jeff took a deep breath, desperately trying to banish his nerves from his body. The mission was finished, everyone came back alive; he should be thrilled. But his mind kept him uneasy. He almost convinced himself that Kenzie kissing him was a crazy dream he had. He still couldn't believe that the feelings he had for her were mutual. _What if it was a “I think I'm dying” thing_ , he thought. No matter how many times she kissed him, he was always going to think she was out of his league. Needing to know where they stood, he stood up, nervously. He knew she would be upstairs in her cabin, so he limped towards the elevator.

His fingers shook as he pressed the button to go to her cabin. His heart started to pound. What if she doesn't want this anymore? He felt unstoppable after they kissed, and he definitely didn't want to stop feeling like that. The elevator needed to hurry up; if he didn't talk to her soon, he would never talk to her. Suddenly, the door opened and he sucked in a breath. His legs moved him forward despite his mind doubting the decision to come up here. Her cabin doors opened and he just stood there.

“Hey,” she said, looking up from the datapad she was reading. She was sprawled out on her bed, wearing the same outfit she wore just before the trip through the Omega-4. She smiled, making his heart race for an entirely different reason. “You gonna just stand there or are you coming in?”

He laughed nervously. “It's called being a gentleman and waiting until you invite me in,” he said.

She laughed. “Jeff Moreau. The perfect gentleman,” she teased. They both laughed as he came into the room. She sat up, moving towards the end of the bed. He meticulously walked down the steps into the main area of the room, looking down almost the entire time. She managed to curl up in a ball at the end of the bed, eyes beaming at him, lips turned up at the corners. He hesitated before sitting on the bed with her. She watched him the entire time. “What’s going on?”

He took a deep breath. “Did you forget we just blew up a Collector base and are now on the run from Cerberus and The Illusive Man?” He asked. He took off his hat, and ran his hand through his hair. He laid back, sighing deeply as he did.

She smiled, saying, “Hey I thought it was kinda fun.”

“Remind me to show you how normal people have fun,” he said quickly.

She uncurled herself, then moved towards him. She hovered above him, holding her hair so it didn't fall in either of their faces. “I'm gonna hold you to that,” she said, voice low. She leaned down, pressing her lips to his. He felt all of his insecurity melting away as he brought a hand to her side. She pulled back, too quickly for his liking. She plopped over, laying down next to him. Their fingers found each other, and they slowly intertwined. He took a deep breath, and turned his head to look at her.

“So I take it you still…uh...wanna do this?” He asked. His voice was steady, but he knew his nerves could come back instantly.

She turned her head. “What? Us?” She asked.

“Yeah..” he trailed off.

“Of course I do. I wouldn't have told you I loved you if I didn't hope something would come of it,” she said. He chuckled, then looked up at the ceiling. “Do _you_ still wanna do...this?”

“Yes,” he answered quickly. “Maybe I just freaked myself out,” he said, quietly. She peered over at him, and he sighed. “I still can't believe you have feelings for me,” he admitted.

“Come on,” Kenzie said, rolling her eyes.

“Kenz, you're damn near perfect. I was lucky enough to count you as a friend and apparently my luck hasn't ran out yet,” he said.

“I'm not…” she started, averting her eyes when her insecurity overwhelmed her.

“McKenzie I meant all of those things I said the other day. You're an incredible commander and an even better person. And you just happen to be gorgeous, too,” he said. Her cheeks started burning. She looked back over to him, then quickly rolled over towards him. She kissed him, holding her head just above his. His hands found her hip, putting a slight pressure on her skin. He kissed her back, opening his mouth, wanting more. As they kissed, she moved her body over his, straddling his hips. He sighed into their kiss, fingers digging into her skin just a little bit more. She pulled her lips away for just a moment, flipping her hair away from her face. Jeff’s hands started to wander up her body. Their lips came together with increasing passion, both of their breathing starting to race. He suddenly stopped kissing her. “Wait….shit,” he said through ragged breaths.

“What? You okay? Am I hurting you?” She asked, worry showing on her face.

“I'm fine. You're fine. I just…” He started. “Here,” he said as he started to sit up. She helped him up, sitting back slightly. When he got comfortable, she brought her hand up to his face.

“Hey, what's going on?” she asked, her voice quiet and caring. He sighed into her hand.

“Okay I want this to happen. I really do. Like really _really_ do,” he said, his voice wavering as he caught his breath. She giggled, her smile beaming. “But I just…”

“Jeff, honey, what is it?” She asked. He took a deep breath.

“Kenzie. Girls like you don't go for guys like me.” He said, his words wielding an edge.

“Jeff…”

“I can't compare to you..” he started, trying hard to avoid her gaze.

“You don't have to compare to me. I'm not comparing you to anyone, Jeff.” She said, and for a moment, he believed her.

“You could literally be with anyone in the galaxy-”

“And I want to be with you,” she said, desperately wanting him to believe her. “You're the only person in this galaxy I trust. You're the only man in this galaxy that I want in my cabin with me right now. And you happen to be very handsome, too,” she said, her smile stopping his heart.

He crashed his lips onto hers, his hands desperately pulled her closer. They kissed each other fiercely, both of them reassured of their feelings for each other. He broke his hold on her to move himself back closer to the pillows. As he leaned back against the pillows, she carefully moved with him, finding herself in his lap. Before she could kiss him again, she felt his hands on her shirt. He pulled up her shirt carefully, eyes darting across her newly exposed skin. He didn't realize how many freckles dotted her pale skin. His grin grew as he pulled the grey shirt off her body, happily surprised to not see a sports bra. A plain black bra held her breasts, and Jeff was conflicted on whether or not he would rather her keep it on or not. She crossed her arms and lifted her shirt over her head completely. She tossed it to the side, and shook her long, blonde hair back behind her shoulders. He couldn't help but smile in appreciation at the sight in front of him.

Before she could say anything, his lips found the sensitive skin of her neck. Her head fell back, the breath left her lung faster than she would have liked. His lips moved along her neck, his beard scratching her skin gently. As his mouth moved up and down her neck, her breathing transformed into soft moans. His teeth nibbled on her collarbone, his palms ran up her back. Her skin tingled at every place their bodies connected. Her hands came up to his head, thumb running under his ear. Her fingers gently scratched the back of his head, and she felt him groan quietly against her skin. She gasped as he made quick work of the clasp of her bra. Her head came back down, and they locked eyes. Smiling at each other, she moved her arms so her bra was removed. She shifted her weight, and he winced slightly. “Shit, sorry,” she whispered.

He looked back up at here, a smile forming. “You're fine. That'll happen quite a few times,” he said. She gave him a little pout. “Kenz, I'd be honored if I broke something while having sex with you,” he said. Her pout grew.

“Please tell me if I'm hurting you. I still need you to fly, you know.”

“Promise.” He said. “Now let's get back to the kissing, that's good,” he said, bringing his mouth to hers. She giggled as she met his lips halfway.

“Very,” she said in between kisses. He leaned forward, her breasts pushing against his shirt. She pulled him closer, her chest rising and falling faster and faster. He moved his forearm under her ass, and slowly flipped her onto her back beside him. He hovered over her, moving a pillow so he could prop his elbow up on it comfortably. His other hand came up to her breast, his lips came to hers. She moaned quietly into his kiss, and he ran his palm over her nipple gently. His lips started roaming along her chin, neck, and then her chest. As his lips went farther down, she bit her lip. His mouth grew rougher as he kissed her breast. Her head fell back as his lips just brushed over her sensitive nipple. She let out an appreciative hum as his lips and tongue worked. He looked up to her, his pride growing hearing her little moans and groans, seeing her bottom lip bitten. He moved his attention to the other breast, earning him a louder moan. He ran his hand down her side while he sucked and kissed her breast. Her breathing was heavier, and her legs instinctively started to move apart. His fingers danced on her skin, a trail of goosebumps marking where his fingertips has been. They kept going down her toned stomach, his touch getting lighter as he got closer to the hemline of her pants. The lower his hands went, the higher his lips came back up. With one hand, he quickly moved his hand under the waistband of her pants. She exhaled loudly, bringing her hand to the back of his head. He grinned as he brought his lips up to her lips, and she pulled him as close as she could. They kissed each other, rough and passionate. One of his hands moved to her hip, pushing down the fabric. She moved one of her hands to help, lifting her hips slightly to allow them to come off. They barely broke their kiss while they worked together to undress her bottom half. Her dark grey panites were exposed. She sat up to pull her leggings off completely, and he leaned back onto the bed. “You haven't even taken off your shoes yet? I'm half naked!” She said, looking him up and down.

“You probably shouldn't give it up so easy..” He said. She opened her mouth, and moved to straddle his hips. She grabbed one of the smaller pillows from her bed and lightly hit him with it. “Ow,” he said through his grin. She giggled, and he kicked off his boots. “Happy?” He asked.

She looked back at his feet, then turned around back to face him. She bit her lip and shook her head. She brought her hands to the bottom of his shirt, and pulled it up quick. He lifted his arms to make it easier, and he felt slightly insecure. She smiled big at his exposed upper half. His shoulders and arms were toned and muscular, but his stomach wasn't as toned. But she loved him no matter what. As he tossed his shirt aside, she laughed low, moving her lips towards his neck. “Mmmm. Very happy,” she said, pressing her lips to his neck. He stifled a groan as her soft lips pressed against his rough skin. His hands traveled up and down her back, never stopping at one spot for very long. Her mouth perfectly nipped along his skin. He gulped, feeling himself harden fast. Her hips moved over his hips ever so slightly, and it was driving him wild.

“Shit, Kenz,” he said, through gritted teeth. She chuckled against his skin. His hands ran over her ass, squeezing it gently. His hand bunched the fabric of her underwear. He kept squeezing her ass gently, and she moaned into his neck, which made him groan. His fingers moved lightly across her skin, moving over her thighs. Without warning, he rubbed his hand over her cunt on top of her underwear. A seductive moan was emitted from her lips as her head jerked up and away from him.

“Oh my God,” she said under her breath as he kept rubbing her gently. Her hands dragged down his stomach, digging in ever so slightly. “I can't believe you, of all people, are such a fucking tease,” she muttered.

He laughed. “You're damn right I am,” he said quietly. His lips closed around one of her nipples as he found her clit through her underwear.

“Holy...shit...Jeff,” she said, a breath in between each word. He moved his lips to the other breast, not lifting his lips from her skin. She grinded on his hand, moans increasing in volume. His fingers moved the stubborn fabric out of his way, sending a shiver through her body. He was surprised to not find any hair on her, but not disappointed. His middle finger ran up her soaking wet opening, and he pulled his lips away from her chest.

“And you were complaining about the teasing,” he said with a smirk. She moaned loud as he moved his finger up and down, spreading her arousal.

“Fuck... you,” she said, sounding more like a moan than a scold.

“I thought that was the plan,” he said. She lowered her head and looked at him. Her pupils were dilated and she had a little bit of a red mark from where she bit her own lip. Her breathing was heavy, and after a few heavy breaths, she brought her lips to his. His hand never left her panties, and she moaned into their kiss. He slipped his finger inside of her, and she nearly collapsed onto the side of him. She moaned into his neck, and he smiled into her shoulder. He carefully moved his finger in and out, playfully biting the skin on her shoulder. She moaned directly into his ear, and his hips nearly bucked up in response. He removed his finger, and she whined. He chuckled into her skin, whispering, “Lay down on your back.”

She obeyed, carefully pulling herself off of him. She laid down, parallel to the pillows on her bed. He climbed off the bed, grabbing a pillow and placing it down on the ground close to the bed. She watched him, catching her breath slightly. She wasn't sure what he was going to do, but when he kneeled down in front of her, she had to hide her smile. He pulled her to the edge of the mattress, pulling her panties off as soon as she was at the edge. Tossing them to the growing pile of discarded clothing, he quickly turned his attention, and tongue, to her pussy that was spread in front of him.

He had planned on making a remark about teasing her again, but he quickly forgot what he was going to say. He ran his tongue along her entire sex, leaving her breathless. He pushed her legs apart, planting his hands near the tops of her thighs. His tongue glided over her opening and clit like a pro. She gripped the sheets, balling them up in her fists. His mouth could be annoying most of the time, but not right now, and McKenzie was thankful for that. She was lost in her own cabin, her mind fuzzy as he sucked and licked her perfectly. “Oh...my...god,” she barely managed to say. Her hand found the back of his head, gently holding him in place. Her moan was high-pitched as he gently sucked her clit. She was losing herself in him, and was only pulled out by the sudden removal of his mouth.

“Ow, shit,” he murmured.

She looked up, and saw his face scrunched up in pain. “You okay?” She asked, sitting up.

“I thought the pillow would help,” he said. He was trying to stand up. She gave him a sympathetic pout, then a wicked grin grew on her face.

“Well, then. It's your turn,” she said, and he had to cough to cover up his groan. She guided him onto the bed, and onto his back. She brought her leg over his hips, and his breathing hitched in anticipation. Their lips met as he laid down completely, and her hand trailed down his body. Her other hand followed as she reached the top of his pants. She continued to kiss him as she fumbled with the button on his pants. He assisted her, helping to pull them off. Their kissing grew sloppy as they finished undressing him. Her lips kissed her way to his hips. His hands covered his face, and he moaned into them. Both of her hands tucked into the waistband of his boxer-briefs, she pulled them off agonizingly slow, kissing along his hip bones as she did.

“Fuck, Kenzie,” he said to his hands. She smiled into his skin. She felt his hard cock on her throat. She gulped as she pulled his underwear down just enough to see the base of his member. She placed a kiss in between his dick and the small curls that surrounded it, and he groaned loud. She repositioned herself to be in between his legs, and pulled his underwear down completely. She was very pleasantly surprised to see that he was _big_. He moved his hands away from his face, looking down at her. She looked him in the eyes as she took his thickness in her mouth completely. “Holy..” He said, before his head fell back down. She grinned as she removed his cock from her mouth. She gently gripped him with one hand, moving her hand slowly up. She ran her tongue over the tip. “God damn, I didn't realize this was a contest for biggest tease,” he huffed out.

Not letting go of him, she said, “Do you want it to be?”

“Fuck no,” he said. She smiled and took him into her mouth again. She found a rhythm, her head moving with her hand in sync. He looked down, and gathered her hair behind her head. He watched her, his vision blurring slightly as he focused on her and nothing else. He moaned as she increased her pace slightly. She looked up at him, locking eyes with him as he took him in completely, his thick cock hitting the back of her throat. “Oh my God,” he said harshly. “Get up here,” he said, gently pulling her hair. She took removed him from her mouth with a pop. He took her hands and guided her over him. She carefully positioned herself over his cock, shaking her hair behind her shoulders. He took a deep breath as his hands moved to her hips.

“I'm not going to hurt you, am I?” She asked.

His grip on her tightened, using a hand to guide her onto him. “You don't move. I'll handle it,” he said.

She nodded, her breathing hitching as she sank down onto him. They both moaned as he filled her completely. His hands gripped her hips, and started lifting her back up. Before he completely pulled her off, he brought her back down. “Fuck..” She breathed out. Placing her hands on his, he continued to move her up and down, setting a slow, agonizing pace. She started to move with him, her hips moving up and down at the pace he set. One of his hands moved to her ass, he bit his lip. Her mouth was open, moans floating out and filling his ears.

“Damn, Kenz,” he said through his teeth. She moaned in response. His hand moved from her ass to her clit, his finger gently rubbing it. He felt his pleasure swelling in him, praying to whatever God there was that she would finish soon. She increased the pace slightly, bouncing on top of him a little harder than he would have liked. He increased the pressure on her pearl just so slightly.

“Oh my God, Jeff,” she practically yelled. Hearing his name nearly sent him over the edge. He felt her walls tightening around him, and he thrust into her roughly once, and she cried out and stopped bouncing. He continued to rub her and thrust into her as she moaned uncontrollably. He pulled out just as he was about to finish, spilling himself up onto her stomach. She panted as she watched him. He grunted as he emptied the last of himself, closing his eyes tight. She exhaled loudly as she got off of him, twisted around, and fell back to his side. They both caught their breath.

“Holy”

“Shit” she finished. They looked at each other. He laughed through his breathing, and she simply smiled. “Lemme get a towel or something,” she panted out.

“I can get it,” he said, sitting up. She went to stop him, but he was already up and walking towards the bathroom. She laid on top of the bed, looking at the ceiling. She tried to slow her breathing. She felt the towel tossed onto her. She giggled, then wiped off her stomach. “Ugh,” he said as he plopped back onto the bed next to her. As soon as she tossed the towel onto the floor, he pulled her close and kissed her.

“Mmmm. I love you,” she whispered.

“So far you've only told me you loved me right before we started what we thought was a suicide mission, and after sex.”

She giggled. “Two very good times to tell you that I love you,” she argued, playfully.

“Very true,” he said, pressing his lips to her forehead. “I love you, too,” he said, quietly.

“So. Did we just make this official?” She asked.

“Aren't I supposed to, like, ask you to be my girlfriend or something?”

“I think we’re beyond formalities, babe,” she said.

“I'll be the worst boyfriend ever. Really annoying.” He rubbed her back aimlessly.

“I can be an annoying girlfriend, too.”

“No way.”

“Yes, I can.”

“Not a shot, Kenz. You don't have an annoying bone in your body,” he scoffed.

“Hey, I’ve never been your girlfriend. You wouldn’t know if I’m an annoying girlfriend or not,”

“I admire your persistence, baby. Let’s see if you can truly be an annoying girlfriend,” he said, a smile on his face.

“You sure you’re ready to give up your wild, bachelor days?”

“For you? Absolutely. Not that I’m a wild and crazy bachelor anyway,” he added. She giggled. “But if I _were_ one, hell yeah I’d give it up for you.” He kissed her nose. “I’d give up everything for you, McKenzie,” he said, his voice quiet.

“You won’t have to,” she said to him, her smile making him fall in love with her all over again. He took a deep breath, and kissed his girlfriend for the first time.


	11. Ready to Face the Music

Sitting in her cabin, McKenzie’s mind wandered. She watched the Batarian system disappear from the galaxy map again and again and again. Shutting her eyes, she tried to force the memory from her brain. A single tear escaped her closed eyes, when she heard Joker’s voice over the intercom. “Kenz, Admiral Hackett is gone,” his voice quieting as he went on. After a long pause, he continued. “You okay?”

She wiped the tear away. “Can you come up here for a minute or two?”

“On my way,” he said. The intercom shut off, and she curled up on her couch. She counted her breathing as she waited for him. Her fingers wouldn’t stop moving around each other, and she felt more tears coming on as she heard the faint sound of the elevator doors open. She couldn’t hold them back anymore as he stepped into her cabin. “Babe, what hap- oh, Kenzie,” he said as he walked as fast as he could to her. He slid onto the couch, pulling her close as he did. She sobbed into his chest, still curled up. He smoothed her hair, kissed her head; anything to make her stop crying. “Kenzie...shhh, I gotchu,” he whispered. She let out a hard sob, and wrapped her arms around him. She cried into the crook of his neck, while his arms held her tight. He read her reports on what happened on Aratoht, what happened with Dr. Kenson, what happened to the Alpha Relay. He knew how shaken up she was, how devastated she was that she could do nothing to save all those Batarians. She let out a few tears after past missions, but nothing like this. “Baby, I’m right here, it’s gonna be alright,” he promised her, kissing her temple as best he could while her face was still buried in his neck. She squeezed him a little tighter, and he could tell she was trying to stop crying. He felt her take a few deep breaths. Pulling herself off him, she sat up, cheeks wet with her tears. He cradled her face, drying her with his thumbs as best he could.

“I don’t think it’s going to be alright, Jeff,” she said, voice still shaking.

“Bullshit. You’re so fucking smart, McKenzie. You can figure it out.”

She looked up, blinking back new tears. “That’s just it. I figured it out. But I don’t want to lose you or anyone…” she trailed off, looking back at him. He searched her eyes, desperate for answers, or at least, a way he could help.

“Kenzie. What happened?”

She took a deep breath. “Jeff, I’m being blamed for the relay being destroyed. And I’m responsible for the lives of all of those Batarians-”

“No you are not, Kenzie. That is not your fault,” he cut her off, frustration evident.

“Jeff, please.” She said, her fingers running down his arms. he watched one hand come down, fingers intertwining with his. He looked back up at her. “Even though I didn’t come up with the idea, I pushed the button. And even though I tried to warn the colony, I am the only one walking away from it. Hackett said the Batarians want blood…” she paused, swallowing back the sob that was threatening to leave her body. “Said I need to be ready to face the music,” she said, tearing her eyes away from his. He froze, sitting back against the couch. He stared out towards her bed, his mind both flooded and empty at the same time.

“Baby…”

“I need to be ready…” a tear fell as she spoke. “Dress blues on when I get back to Earth…”

“When we get back to Earth,” he corrected. She jerked her head towards him, their eyes meeting.

“No.”

“McKenzie,” he started, taking a deep breath. “With all due respect,” he said, and she let out a frustrated huff. “I joined Cerberus because of you. And not just because you’re pretty,” he said, a half smile appearing from under his hat. She rolled her eyes. “But because you’re my commanding officer. There is no one I trust more than you, no one whose decisions I stand behind more than you. And this is my ship. I’m not abandoning it, and hell if I ever abandon you.”

“Jeff, you won’t be able to fly. I don’t want you ruining your career over this. I…. I don’t want you ruining your life because,” she sucked in a breath, “because of me.”

“Kenz, it’s too late for that. I ruined my chances of flying with the Alliance the minute I joined up with Cerberus. I knew that,” he said. He brought his hands up to her cheek, forcing her to look at him. “I love and respect you, McKenzie. But you can’t convince me not to do this with you.”

“You’re so fucking stubborn,” she said, pressing her lips to his. He took his hand off her face, only to removed his hat. The hand then moved to her back, where he pulled her as close as he could. She pulled away, her tears finally stopped. He dried her cheeks again, a lopsided grin forming on his face. “Can you do one thing for me?”

“Just one?” He joked. She chuckled.

“Yes, just one thing,” she said.

“Of course, baby. Anything.”

“Can you help me make sure everyone else is off the ship when we go back? Help me get them wherever they want to go?”

“Absolutely,” he said. He gave her a quick kiss. “I’m always dyin’ for some alone time with you, anyway,” he continued, a sly smile growing. She finally gave him a real smile, albeit with an eye roll, as well.

“Jeez…” she muttered. Taking another deep breath, she looked into his eyes, his impossibly green eyes. “I love you, Jeff.”

“I love you, too, McKenzie,” he said, the words feeling right as they left his mouth. “Wanna take a nap?”

“God, yes,” she practically blurted out. He laughed as she stood up from the couch, undressing as she walked towards the bed. He flipped open his omni-tool, making sure the Normandy’s auto-pilot would be sufficient. He glanced over to her, watching her pull back the covers. She pulled her hair up into a bun at the top of her head, and he couldn’t help but smile. He closed the omni-tool, stripping down to his underwear, just as she did. She sat in bed, waiting for him. They hadn’t shared the bed that many times before, so they were still figuring things out; awkwardly bumping into each other, numb arms, faces full of hair. But one thing they had figured out was that she would let him get comfortable, and then she would lie down, getting comfortable around him. So, he climbed into what was now their bed, laid down on his back, and stretched out his arm for her. She dimmed the lights, then curled up to his side, the warmth from his body comforting her. “You’re always so warm,” she said as she carefully laid her head on his shoulder. His arm encircled her, his palm caressing her back.

He brought his lips towards her forehead. “Only when I’m around you,” he said, before kissing her forehead. She chuckled, then sighed. It wasn’t soon after she closed her eyes that he heard her snoring softly. He sighed, then shut his eyes. It was going to be hell until they went to Earth. But anything he could do to make it easier on her, he would do it. Anything.


	12. The Dad Thing

Room with a view, she thought to herself. The cell McKenzie was being kept in, although she would hardly call it a cell, was much more cozy than she expected. She passed the time mostly by watching the city beneath her. She had never spent much time in Vancouver, but the view certainly was nice. She was lost in her thoughts, pulled out by the sound of the door opening, and Admiral David Anderson’s familiar voice. “Hey, Sunshine,” he said. She smiled at his nickname for her, and turned around to greet him.

“Hey, Admiral,” she said, stepping towards him. He waited for a moment, then held his arms out for a hug. She happily embraced the man, his hugs always comforting her to no end.

“How you holding up in here?” He asked as he pulled back.

“Oh, it could be worse.”

“Good. Look, I had a few minutes and I just wanted to ask you something real quick,” he said, walking over to the window.

“Sure thing. What’s up?” She might have been a prisoner, technically, but he tried his best to let her know what was going on.

“I was on board the Normandy, making sure the retrofits were going to plan, checking up on things…” he started. She walked over and stood next to him. “Joker’s giving his guards hell,” he said, slight annoyance in his voice.

“I hope you didn’t come all the way over here to tell me that Jeff’s being annoying,” she said. He looked at her, eyes wide, a smile appearing on his face. Feeling his gaze, she turned towards him. “What?”

“Jeff?” He asked. She quickly looked back out the window, cheeks turning pink.

“Well, that is his name…”

“It is. But since when did you start calling him by his first name?” He asked, already knowing the answer. She started to answer, but barely anything came out. “I think I just got my answer…”

“To what?” She asked, slightly embarrassed and more than slightly confused. He chuckled, looking back towards the window.

“Joker had mentioned having girlfriend...which surprised me. I didn’t think he had time to meet anyone. And then told his guards her name,” he said, a smile on his face. She covered her face.

“Oh, God,” she said, the embarrassment in her voice clear.

“Now I’m just upset that I’m finding out this way, Sunshine,” he said.

“It only happened a few weeks ago, David. And we haven’t had a lot of time to catch up…” She said quickly.

“I know, I’m just messin’ with you,” he said, and pulled her close. He placed a kiss on her head. “You two work well together. It was only a matter of time before you noticed how he looked at you…”

“What do you mean?” She said, looking up at him in disbelief.

“Come on, Kenzie. You guys worked together closely, and you are a beautiful young woman. Anyone would fall for you.”

“You have to say that,” she said with an eyeroll.

“Doesn’t make it less true,” he said. She hid her smile as she stood at his side. “Just tell me one thing. Does he make you happy?”

“Yes, he does. And I already trust him with my life. Might as well trust him with my heart, too.”

“Then I’m glad you’re happy. That’s all that matters to me,” he said, shifting slightly. He turned towards her.

“Thanks, David.” She said, her smile widening by the second. He gave her a gentle pat on the shoulder, then started to leave.

“You’re welcome. Now I’ve got to go have a talk with him,” he said.

“No. Don’t do the dad thing,” she pleaded. He stopped and turned around.

“The dad thing?”

“Were you planning on vaguely threatening him? Warning him to not break my heart or something?” She asked.

“I wasn’t going to vaguely threaten him,” he protested. She glared at him. “I’m just gonna threaten him,” he said with a wink. He waved as he left her cell, her laughter carrying through the doors. 


	13. Calm In the Storm

“McKenzie. Coffee. Bridge. Now,” Joker said over the intercom. McKenzie let out a breath, looking at Liara.

“You’ve done all you can, Shepard. Ash will be just fine until we get to the Citadel,” she reassured her. McKenzie took another deep breath.

“Ok,” she said quietly. “I’ll be right up, Joker.”

“Alright,” he said, followed by a click. McKenzie rubbed her face, realizing just how much she needed to see him. She stood up from beside Ashley’s makeshift bed in the Med Bay, silently telling Ash she needed to stay alive. She didn’t look at anyone as she went to the coffee maker just outside. She steadied her breathing while making a fresh pot of coffee. As she waited for it to brew, she leaned back against the counter, realizing how different the ship looked. The Alliance stripped away any evidence that this was a Cerberus ship, and slapped an Alliance logo wherever they could. Memories flooded her brain of the SR-1. She smiled to herself, pulled back to reality by the beeping of the machine behind her. She absent-mindedly poured two cups, adding the necessary cream and sugar. And she hurried up to her pilot.

Joker sat in his chair, which was decidedly less comfortable than the chair that used to be there. He just needed to see her. They hadn’t seen each other since the day they arrived back at Earth, and he just needed to hear her voice in person. And since it was public knowledge that they were together, and Admiral Anderson was turning a blind eye to their fraternization, he just needed to kiss her again. He knew that the last few hours have been a whirlwind, and he just needed to make sure she was okay. He adjusted his hat, deciding to just toss it aside. He smiled big as he heard her coming up the bridge. “Wait, since when was there a door here?” He spun the chair around, his heart beat increasing. The door opened as he stood up. “When did you get a door?” She asked him. His smile only grew as she moved into the cockpit. He took the two cups from her hand, placing them down on the panels beside him. “Hi,” she said gently as he brought one hand to her face, wrapping his other arm around her waist. He didn’t respond, he just kissed her. They wrapped their arms around each other, the months they spent apart melting between them. She moaned quietly against his lips, and he pulled his mouth away. He panted slightly as he hugged her, holding her as if he’d never get the chance to again. They stood together for what felt like hours.

“How’s my pretty little jailbird?” He asked, finally pulling back.

“Just peachy,” she said quietly, whatever smile she had before disappearing. He pulled her close again.

“Shhh,” he said before pressing his lips to her forehead. “We’re going to be fine. All of us.”

She sighed. “You know, I almost believe you,” she said, her voice shaking slightly. He chuckled, and started to sit back down in his chair.

“So… What do you think of her make-over?” He said, while gesturing to around the cockpit. She cracked the smallest of smiles, and his heart skipped a beat.

“Seriously, what’s with the door?” She asked as she handed him his coffee.

“I have secret pilot business sometimes.”

“Really? What about?” She asked, the smile on her face growing. The world maybe falling apart around her, but at least he was here.

“It wouldn’t be a secret if I told you. I don’t ask about your N7 shit, do I?” He asked while he piloted the ship with ease.

“You do sometimes. But fine. I won’t ask about it…” she trailed off. They looked at each other, and both laughed after a seconds-long staring contest. “Oh, by the way. Thanks for bragging out me to your guards,” she said, while bringing her coffee to her lips.

He laughed. “You’re welcome. Although, I admit I wouldn’t have done it if I knew Anderson was there,” he said.

“You do realize that us being together is against regulations, right?” She asked. He looked at her, his grin crooked.

“Commander Shepard is going against regs? Commander Sunshine?” He teased. She rolled her eyes, starting to walk out. He grabbed her hand and pulled her back to him. “No no no no no, please baby, stay. Stay until we get to the Citadel?” He begged. She chuckled, putting her coffee down. She climbed into his chair with him, sighing against his chest.

“I missed this,” she said quietly. He gave her a quick squeeze.

“So did I,” he whispered. He did his best to pilot with her in the chair, only making her get up as they approached the Citadel. And all too soon, their moment alone, their calm in the storm, was over.


	14. Few More Minutes

McKenzie opened her eyes slowly, not entirely sure how long she had just been asleep. A good night’s rest was a rarity lately, so she took a few good hours whenever she could. She stretched her arms above her head, pulled out of her just-awoken trance by Jeff’s stirring next to her. She cracked a smile and rolled over towards him, careful not to wake him. She realized her caution was unnecessary when he wrapped his arm around her as she cuddled up next to him. They quietly chuckled as they pressed their bodies together. They knew as soon as they left her cabin, they were Joker and Shepard, not Jeff and McKenzie. They both wanted the next few minutes to last a lifetime. She lifted her head slightly, kissing his bearded cheek softly. “You didn’t wake up at all,” he noted, eyes still closed. 

“Mmm. Yeah, it was a good night,” she said quietly, her voice groggy. She draped her leg over his, clinging to him. 

“I had a crazy dream, though,” he said. She looked up at him, smiling when she noticed he still wasn’t opening his eyes. 

“Oh yeah?” 

“Yeah. This beautiful blonde told me she loved me. Weird, right?” He smiled, tightening his grip on her slightly. 

“You’re dreaming of cheating on me?” She asked. He opened his eyes, looking down at her at seeing a sleepy smile on her face making his heart race. 

“I’m trying to be cute and you’ve got to be a dick about it,” he said. She giggled, pressing another kiss to his cheek. 

“Solid effort, but keep tryin’,” she murmured. He shook his head, bringing his lips to hers. Kissing her as soon as they woke up was quickly becoming one of his favorite feelings. He pulled away, putting his head back on the pillow. “I have a million things to do,” she murmured, dreading the day ahead of her. 

“The first thing you need to do is stay here with me for a little bit,” he said, placing a kiss on her head. She laughed, trying to sit up. He pulled her back down, her elbow hitting his stomach a little too hard. 

“Ow, sorry,” she said as she hit him. 

“That was a better idea in my head,” he admitted as they both adjusted. She laughed, kissing the spot on his ribs where she unintentionally elbowed him. 

“Yeah, it was. You okay?” 

“I’ll be fine,” he said. He gently pulled her close to him. She sighed into him, her lips pressing onto his bare chest. 

“I really do need to get up, babe,” she whined. 

“Just a few more minutes,” he said. He mumbled something else. 

“What?” she asked, looking up at him, chin resting on his chest. 

“Few more minutes, that’s all,” he lied. 

“No, no. What did you say after that?”

“Nothing.”

“Jeff,” she warned. 

“Fine. I said I need a few more minutes with you because you are so beautiful and perfect and-” he said flatly, and she cut him off with a groan. “Alright. And because my legs are really stiff and I can’t get up yet,” he admitted. She giggled. 

“Why didn’t you say that?” she asked, moving her body up. She latched onto her side, lips finding his cheek. 

“Well, the first part is true. I’m gonna take any time in bed with you I can get,” he said. She smiled and turned her head into the pillow. “But I just wanted you to think it was that and not my stupid legs,” he said quietly. She turned her head back quickly. He avoided her gaze. 

“Jeff, you can tell me-” 

“Kenzie, stop. It’s fine,” he said. He just wanted the conversation to be over. She huffed in frustration. She wasn’t going to drop it, so he took a deep breath. “I just… I hate using it as an excuse, you know?” She brought her hand up to his head, her delicate fingers playing with his short hair. “You treat me like a real person and I don’t want that to stop.” His heart started beating faster. “I don’t want you to stay in bed with me because my legs hurt.” 

“Baby, if we could stay up here all day, I wouldn’t let you leave this semi-comfortable bed. But if you’re hurting, I want to know. I can’t force you to tell me, but…” 

“I’m just so used to lying about it, or downplaying it.” She kissed his cheek again. “You have more important things to worry about, I shouldn’t-” 

“Jeff. Please. I want… Let me worry about you,” she said, her voice cracking. He turned onto his side, his rough fingers on her skin. “I need you. I can’t do any of this without you, so the least I can do is make sure you don’t break a leg.” He closed his eyes and brought his lips to hers, too many words coming to his mind. She pulled back, eyes still closed. “I love you,” she whispered desperately. 

“I love you, too. So much,” he replied, his voice just as desperate. He kissed her head, pulling her tight. “God I’m so lucky,” he said into her skin. She smiled, fingers dancing up and down his side. 

“So am I.” He looked at her, her expression soft. 

“I’ll start telling you when it hurts. But, I don’t expect you to do anything most of the time, alright?” 

“Okay,” she said, her smile growing. He sighed, wondering why he was so stubborn sometimes. He kissed the top of her head. 

“Alright. Help me up,” he said, reluctantly pulling away from her. She held on to him, giggling as he tried to sit up. 

“Nuh-uh. Few more minutes,” she said, a playful smile on her face. He should say no, they both have work to do. 

“You win,” he said as he sunk back down. 


	15. Something Stupid

Jeff and James sat at the large table in the middle of Deck 3. The chatted idly, sipping their less-than-tasty coffee. The doors to the main battery opened, and Garrus walked out. “I’m a little upset that you already had a nickname, Joker,” James said.

“Kenzie already has one,” he noted, taking a long sip. He winced as he tasted the last bit of the coffee.

“She was Commander Sunshine while she was locked up. But out there on Menae? She was Lola. She wasn’t a ray of sunshine,” he said.

“Yeah, well. She doesn’t like husks,” Joker said.

“That’s an understatement,” the Turian said with a chuckle. They both knew all too well how she reacts when husks showed up on missions unannounced. Joker got quite the earful when she recapped the last mission to him. “Do you remember how pissed she was when we had to deal with that abandoned mine last year?” Joker laughed.

“I’ve never heard her curse so much,” he said.

“The entire mine was filled with husks and the only way to deal with them all was to set off this bomb that was in there already. Even Grunt was surprised at how violent she got with them,” Garrus explained. After that mission, everyone knew that the most entertaining way to make McKenzie mad was bringing up the husk-infested mine.

“Don’t blame her. Husks are fuckin’ weird, man,” James admitted, getting up to get another cup of coffee.

“So, Joker. Bet you’re pretty happy about EDI’s new body,” Garrus said, lacking subtlety.

“Why does everyone keep saying that? You all know I’m dating McKenzie,” he said, feeling his cheeks get red. He was glad hadn’t trimmed his beard in a few days; the unkempt hairs hid his blushing. The elevator doors opened, and Joker prayed to God it wasn’t McKenzie. Although, maybe McKenzie walking in would force this conversation to be over.

“Yeah, you’re dating our hot commander, and you get EDI next to you in the cockpit.”

“You ever wonder how Joker here got so damn lucky?” Ken’s Scottish accent rang out. Joker liked Ken, and was glad McKenzie was able to get him and Gabby out of prison and back on the Normandy.

“Yeah, alright. I’m not upset about it,” Joker admitted.

“Be honest, Joker. Did you have anything to do with EDI getting into that body?” Garrus asked. Joker took a deep breath.

“If I had something to do with it, you really think I would have kept quiet about it?” he asked.

“Who’s hotter, the Commander or EDI?” James asked, a smug grin on his face.

“Oh, EDI for sure,” McKenzie’s voice suddenly rang out. The four men froze. She came around the corner, her grin more smug than James’. “Come on, she’s literally made to look sexy. There’s no competition,” she said, casually walking towards the mock kitchen. Ken scurried off. James and Garrus averted their eyes, looking anywhere but at their commander. She poured a cup of coffee, turning back around as she finished. “I have never seen you guys speechless.” Joker covered his face with his hands.

“I wasn’t going to answer,” he said nervously.

“Why not? It’s an honest question,” she said, glancing at James. He coughed. She turned her attention to Joker, who was pulling his hat down closer to his eyes. She chuckled, walking back towards the elevator. Joker stood up, following her with his tail between his legs.

“I’m… uh,” he started, having trouble finding the right words. When they reached the elevator, she looked back at him.

“I told you I could be an annoying girlfriend…” she said, her smile growing bigger. He jerked his head up, his eyes wide.

“Are you serious?!” he asked. She threw her head back laughing as she pulled him into the elevator. “I hate you,” he mumbled as her back hit the wall. He wrapped his arms around her, thankful she wasn’t mad.

“You’re cute when you think you’re in trouble,” she said, bringing her lips to his. His hands moved to her ass, squeezing it quickly. The doors to the elevator closed.

“You’re a brat,” he said, moving his lips across her cheek, down her jaw, and to her neck. She exhaled loudly, her head falling back. “I’m sorry you had to hear that,” he murmured into her skin. She wrapped her arms around his back, one hand moving up and down his shirt slowly.

“Mmm, it’s fine,” she said, her voice breathy. His teeth grazed her neck, and she gasped lightly, almost dropping her coffee. “Don’t start something you can’t finish, Flight Lieutenant.”

“Oh, I can finish this,” he said. He pressed the button that led to her cabin. His lips found hers again, kissing her roughly. She pulled away suddenly, looking at him with her big, brown eyes.

“We should do this more often,” she teased.

“Do what?” he asked.

“You say something stupid and then you fuck me to make it up to me,” she said with a grin. He laughed. The doors opened, and he led her into her cabin.

“Well. Me saying dumb shit all the time finally has some benefits,” he said, littering her face with light kisses. She laughed.

“I love you,” she said, still giggling. He kissed her lips, both of them smiling slightly.

“Love you, too. Now let’s do what we came up here to do,” he said, his hands pulling up her uniform shirt.

“Mmm. Please,” she said.

 

James wandered up to the CIC, curious as to hear what the Commander said to Joker. When the elevator doors opened, he was surprised to see that her station was empty. But he knew that Shepard had a million things to do, so it actually wasn’t that surprising. He walked up the bridge, the doors to the cockpit opening. “What the…. EDI where is he?” He asked.

“I believe Jeff is with Commander Shepard in her cabin. Would you like me to tell him you are looking for him?” she answered. James laughed and shook his head.

“Nah, I’ll talk to him when he’s done,” he said, leaving the cockpit. Garrus was walking up the bridge, probably for the same reason.

“What did she say to him,” Garrus asked. James laughed.

“They’re up there right now. And I swear, if that son of a bitch gets laid because of this…”


	16. Swear Jar

McKenzie walked into Grissom Academy, _Commander Mode Activated_ , as Joker would say. She quickly found Kahlee Sanders, gladly taking out the Cerberus troops that were in her way. “Sanders? We’re clear, it’s me,” she called out. Garrus and James were right behind her as she walked through the doors.

“Commander, thank you. Admiral Anderson always said you were the best,” the woman said as she lowered her weapon. “And with Cerberus coming for my students, I need the best.”

McKenzie crackled a small smile, happy that David was that proud of her. It quickly faded as she got back to business. “How many of you are there?” She listened to Kahlee explain what the situation was at the academy. Garrus went out back into the hall, while James lingered in the doorway. Her curiosity got the best of her, however. “You said something about Admiral Anderson?”

“Yes, we met about, oh god, what’s it been? 20 years ago when he was a Spectre candidate. I was there when Saren betrayed him,” she explained, and a chill ran down McKenzie’s spine. “David saved my life that day. He’s a good man. And now his ray of sunshine is helping me out,” she said with a knowing smile. Kenzie couldn’t help but match it.

“He sure does love that nickname,” she said.

“He said you were ‘the first ray of sunshine after a week of rain’ and from where I’m sitting, I couldn’t agree more,” Sanders added. She turned her attention back to the terminal in front of her. McKenzie’s smile faded.

“He was on Earth when the Reapers hit. He stayed behind… when I got off-world.”

“Oh. I hadn’t heard. We’ve been cut off from most news. He’s alive?” she asked.

“You kidding? The man is a stubborn bastard,” McKenzie said, and both of them chuckled quietly.

“Don’t have to tell me twice. If we get out of here… well. Just tell him to stay alive.”

“Yes, Ma’am,” McKenzie replied. Their conversation changed, turning back to the task at hand. Sanders informed her that she was working on getting communications back, when it suddenly seemed that she was successful. McKenzie didn’t catch the first part of the transmission, but she did catch enough to know where she needed to go. “Orion Hall?” she asked, making sure the clip in her gun was full.

“Back out the door and down the hallway,” Sanders explained. “I can get the door open.” Garrus and James fell back into formation behind Shepard as she walked through the doorway.

“I’ll bring them back here, and we can make a run for the shuttle,” McKenzie stated confidently. Kahlee turned to look at her.

“Thank you, Commander. I’ll stay put. With luck, I can regain control of some of our systems,” she said, turning back to the console in front of her. McKenzie walked out, James and Garrus right behind her.

“So, that’s why they call you Sunshine, huh?” James asked. She chuckled.

“Yeah, I guess so. Come on, let’s get these kids out.”   


 

Rodriguez was pulled onto the shuttle, and they were clear to leave. McKenzie tried to catch her breath, along with trying to wrap her mind around what just happened. Jack is a teacher. Jack called McKenzie 'the Queen of the Girl Scouts' while _she_ was the one teaching. She shook her head as she called the Normandy. “Joker, we flew out on a Cerberus shuttle. Watch your fire,” she said.

“Right, I’ve got you on sensors. Should just be a minute,” he replied. Jack immediately began praising her students, and a smile grew on McKenzie’s face. Jack was meant for this, anyone could tell.

“I can’t believe we got them out alive. I was going to suggest they stick to support roles, but, perhaps they’re ready after all,” Kahlee commented. McKenzie took a deep breath, and looked at Jack. She was silent, but her eyes were begging. Jack knew them better than anyone, and McKenzie trusted Jack.

“They’re definitely ready…” she started. “But, the Alliance needs them in a support role.” The kids protested, and her and Jack did their best to calm them down.

“Commander, we’ve got a visual on you now. Preparing to dock,” Joker chimed in. “Hey Jack, now that you’re military, you gonna wear a uniform? Or are you just getting the officer’s bars tattooed on?”

“Hey Joker, you think you’re the only one who gets to make out with Shepard?” Jack asked. McKenzie laughed.

“If you two make out, I wanna be there.”

“Screw you, fu-. Flight Lieutenant,” Jack said.

“Uh, what the hell was that?” Joker asked.

“Jack promised to watch her language in order to maintain the necessary professionalism we need from our teachers,” Kahlee informed him.

“What, does she have a swear jar or something?”

“I should have pulled her into the shuttle and kissed her, just like you did after the Collectors,” Jack muttered. McKenzie laughed again as she remembered the day. As soon as the Normandy’s airlock had closed, Joker pulled McKenzie in for a kiss. In front of a few of the crew members. Jack was the most vocal about their public display of affection, and apparently, was never going to let them live it down.

“I bet if we emptied it, we could afford another cruiser,” Joker said. McKenzie wasn’t sure if he had heard Jack’s comment.

“Cover your ears, kids," Jack ordered. Colorful language floated out of her mouth, and McKenzie's laughter filled the shuttle. They probably didn't need to cover their ears. 


	17. Damn Lucky

The Citadel Presidium offered a strange sense of calm, and normalcy. McKenzie walked around, overhearing conversations. So many were bad, so many people needed help, but the war was talked about like it was happening in some far away place. But even though the galaxy needed saving, the Presidium looked beautiful as ever. She saw Jeff sitting on a bench, and she made her way towards him.

He watched her practically glide down the stairs of the Presidium Commons, and caught more than one person glance her way as she descended. He couldn’t blame them; when most people thought of Commander Shepard, they didn’t expect a beautiful blonde. He couldn’t help but feel proud as she walked towards him, her smile beaming. “Hey, Kenzie,” he said as she slid onto the bench next to him.

“Hey,” she said back, entangling her arms with his. She placed her head on his shoulder. He sighed as she embraced him.

“Big news, the new Blasto movie is breaking opening week-records,” he started. McKenzie knew there was going to be a sarcastic comment coming, so she sighed gently. Her hand crept down and found his, and he intertwined his fingers with hers. “There’s also a big expose on quasar tournaments, tips on how to make your apartment look bigger, and… oh yeah. A big-ass Reaper invasion.” She rolled her eyes and squeezed his hand gently. “These people have no idea.”

She picked her head up to look at him. “Well, when big events shake up the galaxy, people cling to what’s familiar,” she said.

“You say that like it’s a good thing.”

“He says as his girlfriend is clinging onto him,” she teased. He turned his head and chuckled. “It’s better than panic and rioting,” she added.

“I guess. Speaking of panic and rioting, have you visited Grunt in the hospital yet?” he asked. She took a deep breath, her head returning to his shoulder gently. 

“I did. Both Thane and Dr. Michel said he’s not being a dream patient,” she informed him.

“I’m sorry, were you expecting him to sit still and let them poke him with needles?”

“A girl can dream, right?”

“What? That her tank-born Krogan child behaves?” he asked. They all joked about Grunt being McKenzie’s son, and she brushed it off with a laugh most of the time. But, after the mission on Utukku, it didn’t seem like much of a joke anymore. “But, I don’t know,” he started again. He was frustrated, and McKenzie picked her head up. “I just wish there was a middle ground, you know? Little less gardening advice, little more war prep.”

“I know, but it’ll happen. Once there’s something for people to do to help,” she confidently told him. He looked at her, her lips starting to form a smile. He took a deep breath.

“There you go again, making people smile through anything,” he mumbled as he squeezed her hand. She giggled. “Meanwhile, people ignore the unshackled AI walking around the Presidium.”

“She causing trouble?” she asked, turning her attention to EDI.

“No, no. She’s my ‘mobility assistance mech’. Thanks to my Vrolik Syndrome, I’m legally entitled to bring her everywhere,” he explained. She looked at him, her brown eyes narrowing at him.

“One day you’ll tell people that I’m your ‘mobility assistance mech’,” she joked. “Then you can bring me everywhere.”

“Kenzie, I don’t need an excuse for that,” he said, then placed a kiss on her forehead. She blushed at the affection, but was still smiling at him when he pulled away.

“Well, I’m sure she appreciates getting out and seeing the sights,” McKenzie said. She sat up straighter, never removing her arm from his. She needed this, too. She was finally able to sit with her boyfriend, and relax. Even if it was only for a few minutes. Aria had her running around the Citadel, which she appreciated, but it was still exhausting.

“Ah, she’s earned a little shore leave,” he said. He nudged Kenzie. “So have you, babe,” he whispered. She took a deep breath.

“Yet, even on shore leave, I’m running around doing favors for everyone.”

“Kenz, I’d rather watch you run around the Citadel doing favors for people than hear you dealing with rachni. Just saying.” She looked up at him.

“I guess this is better, huh?”

“You’re still doing important stuff. It’s just less dangerous. And don’t get me wrong, I like a good firefight when we get one,” he explained. She laughed, her smile the brightest sight on the Presidium. “But this is nice, too.”

“You make a good argument, Jeff.”

“When this is all over, I should be a lawyer.”

“You’d be a _terrible_ lawyer,” she said. He scoffed, which made her laugh.

“What makes you the expert on lawyers anyway?”

“I’m not an expert, but I’m pretty sure if you want to be a lawyer, you have to follow the law. And, you know, not steal Alliance warships.”

“McKenzie Shepard, if I didn’t steal the Normandy, I wouldn’t be her pilot. And I never would have met you. So I don’t care how illegal-”

“Wait, what?” she asked.

“Oh, come on. Anderson never told you the story?”

“Um, no. What the hell are you talking about, Jeff?” He laughed, remembering Anderson’s face that day.

“Another day. It’s a long story,” he said, kissing her temple. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath.

“You’re ridiculous. But I should go,” she said, turning her head towards his. He pouted his lips. “I know. I’m glad I caught up with you, though,” she said quietly.

“Me too,” he said, his voice as quiet as hers. He leaned forward, and she met him halfway, giving him a quick peck. “Where to next, anyway?”

“I have a few more things to do here, and then we need to get to Tuchanka. The Primarch asked me to help out with a platoon that crash-landed there,” she explained, then stood up.

“I’ll be ready whenever you need me,” he said, eyes never leaving hers. She smiled, then turned to walk away. His pride swelled again as he saw people look at him, then at her, and then back at him. He knew it was crazy that a guy like him had landed a girl like her. He sat back on the bench, a smug grin growing on his face. He was a damn lucky guy.


	18. Wanderlust

Jeff wasn’t happy. And it was because McKenzie wasn’t happy. Although, wasn’t happy wasn’t quite the right wording. She was stressed out of her mind. Political bullshit was winning, and there were few people on board who were happy about it. He knew that McKenzie wanted to tell Wrex about the bomb that the Turians had left on Tuchanka, and was now under Cerberus control. The Primarch didn’t want her to, and the Alliance didn’t want her to. But her gut was telling her to tell him. But she didn’t. And now, the Primarch’s son was dead, and she had to be the one to tell him. He took a deep breath as the door behind him opened. 

“You might wanna go check on your girlfriend, Joker,” Wrex said. The krogan’s voice startled him. 

“Huh?” 

“Shepard… she’s, uh,” he started. Joker turned around, utterly confused. He knew Wrex wasn’t eloquent, but he was straight forward. “Crying,” he said, then looked around the cockpit. 

“Do you know why she’s crying?” Joker asked. 

“Uh.... Yeah, it was because of...me,” he replied, cautiously. 

“You made her cry?!” Joker said as he switched to autopilot. 

“I’ve held a gun in her face and she didn’t flinch. How was I supposed to know that telling her she should have told me about the bomb would make her break down?” Wrex quickly made excuses. 

“Shit.” 

“I’ll let you deal with her,” Wrex said, moving out of the way as Joker limped by him. 

“So thoughtful,” he said dryly. He made his way through the CIC, trying to figure out what to say or do. He didn’t really look at anyone while he walked, and he took a deep breath as the doors to the elevator closed. 

His hat was removed, and he rubbed his hands over his face. He knew that she was going to do it; stop the reapers and end this war. If anyone could, it was going to be her. But, he was realistic. This war was far from over. Things like this are going to keep happening. This wasn’t going to get any easier for her. The elevator doors opened, and he could hear her sobbing through the doors. His heart broke. He took a deep breath and a step forward. “Fuck, sorry,” she choked out through her cries. 

“McKenzie…” 

“Jeff… I can’t do this,” she said. 

“Yes you can,” he argued. He limped towards her bed, where she was sitting at the end. Her eyes were red, cheeks pink, chest heaving, hair messed up. His heart broke again. “Kenz,” he whispered, sitting down with her. She collapsed onto him, and he did his best to ignore the pain. She cried and cried and cried, each sob hurting Jeff physically and mentally. A tear fell from his green eyes. She pulled away quickly, standing up and wiping her face. 

“I can’t fucking believe Wrex came up here to tell me I was wrong. Does he even realize what he’s asking me to do?” She was yelling through her tears. He let her, let her get everything out. “Does he realize I had to look someone dead in the eyes today and tell them that their son is dead? And that there was nothing… I could do… to help,” she said, and Jeff immediately stood up. Her moment of anger was gone, and replaced by even more tears. 

“McKenzie, it’s okay,” he said, trying to comfort her. He was never very good at this, but damn if he wouldn’t try for her. “You did everything right.” 

“I didn’t tell my friend about a bomb on his planet,” she tried to argue. 

“Because more than one person was telling you not to.” He knew that it was a tough call to make, but it was the right one. “Listen, I’m going to kill Wrex for making you cry,” he said. She gave the smallest of smiles, walking over to him. He held his arms out and pulled her close. “But everyone on this ship knows that if you had told Wrex… well, shit would have hit the fan.” 

“This fucking sucks,” she said under her breath. He chuckled slightly, then sat her back down on the bed. 

“You should tell that to Diana next time she asks for a statement,” he joked. She laughed. A real laugh. “No, it’ll be good,” he said, then he started to impersonate the ANN reporter on board. “This just in, the great Commander Shepard says ‘this fucking sucks’ when asked about saving the galaxy for a third time,” he mocked. She laughed again, then coughed. He kissed her forehead as best he could with her moving around. 

“You really think I’m saving the galaxy?” 

He stared at her, not sure what he just heard. McKenzie Shepard didn’t think she was saving the galaxy? “Um, you’re fucking with me, right? This is a joke?” he asked. Her face quickly changed, her lips pursed slightly. She turned her head, looking towards the door. “McKenzie, you are about to cure the genophage, which will ensure an alliance between the Turians and the Krogan. And after that’s done, they’re both going to help the humans on Earth.” She turned back to him. “You’re a damn miracle worker as far as I’m concerned.” 

“I… thanks. I guess I need to hear that all this bullshit is somehow going to be worth it.” 

“Hey, you’re not going into hell on my watch unless there’s a good reason for it.” She cracked another small smile, then took a deep breath. He did the same, slightly less dramatic as hers. 

“Okay. I’m good,” she said. 

“You Sure?”

“Yes.”

“Positive?” 

She started to giggle. “Yes, I’m positive.” 

“So no one else is going to come up to me and tell me my girlfriend is crying?” 

“Wrex told you I was crying?” 

“Kenz, you should have seen him. He stuttered,” he said, hoping it would cheer her up. 

“Oh my God,” she mumbled, her head resting on his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around her, resting his head on hers. “I don’t know how you do it,” she said. 

“Do what?” 

“I was screaming and crying when you came up here and 5 minutes later, I’m laughing and fine,” she said, picking her head up to look at him. 

“That’s what the best boyfriend in the galaxy does,” he said. They both smiled. 

“Best pilot in the galaxy, best boyfriend in the galaxy…” 

“No, no. By all means, keep going,” he said. She kicked off her boots and sat cross-legged on the bed. 

“Mmm, best friend in the galaxy, best eyes in the galaxy, best cuddler in the galaxy.” 

“McKenzie you almost broke three of my ribs while we took a nap yesterday.” 

“It was only because you kept pulling me closer,” she said, nudging her knee into him gently. 

“Can’t say I blame me,” he said with a sigh. She rolled her eyes. 

“Seriously, Jeff. Thank you. You always know how to make me smile.” 

“Just call me Flight Lieutenant Sunshine.” She groaned dramatically, falling back onto the bed. He laughed, pulling off his shoes and laying down with her. She took off his hat, carelessly tossing it aside. 

“I’m gonna get changed really quick,” she said, quickly getting back up. He propped himself against the pillows, and watched her as she changed. 

“Okay, I’m gonna ask you something that’s been bugging me,” he said, crossing his ankles. Clad only in one of his t shirts, and her black underwear, she paused. 

“Okay, that’s the scariest thing you’ve ever said to me,” she responded. She pulled her long hair up into a messy bun on the top of her head. 

“‘Mere,” he said, motioning her to come over. She carefully walked over to him, coming around to the side of the bed closest to him. She stood in front of him, facing him. He looked her up and down, green eyes dragging along her body. 

“What?” she asked, her cheeks growing pink. She was aware that people checked her out from time to time, but when Jeff checked her out, she got a strange rush of adrenaline and nervousness. She felt his hands on her thighs, and he forced her to turn around. Now she was curious. 

“What is with,” he started. She felt his palm move along her skin, goosebumps following his hands. They suddenly stopped at the apex of her thigh and ass, and she knew exactly what he was going to ask. “This,” he finished. His fingers traced over her faded black tattoo. She laughed, then turned back around to him. 

“I was 16 and it seemed like a good idea at the time,” she explained. Written in ornate cursive was the word  _ wanderlust _ , McKenzie now realizing it was cheesy and immature. 

“Okay, but why is it right underneath your ass?” She laughed, and then sighed. 

“We were constantly going to clubs and bars and crap, and we wore the most ridiculously tight, short dresses.” 

“Please tell me you still have them,” he begged. She rolled her eyes, and continued her explanation. 

“Anyway, if someone came up to us asking about our tattoos, we were able to shoot back with ‘Why are you looking at my tattoo’.”

“Who's we?” he asked. She walked to the end of the bed and climbed in next to him. 

“While I ran with the Reds, there were three people I trusted. Laura, Jake and Gina. Laura, Gina and I got the same tattoos.” 

“You guys that close?” 

“Well, we had to look out for each other. The guys who were in charge weren't exactly… gentlemen,” she explained, her voice growing quiet. The only person who knew about her past were the people in it, and David Anderson. Jeff knew that she didn't know her parents and had a pretty rough time on Earth, but he didn't know exactly how bad. “They would send us to clubs so we could try and get information or drugs or guns or whatever from the other gangs in the city. Who better to extract information than the hot, young girls?” 

“So they just sent you into a club, in a skimpy ass dress, to get some red sand?” 

“That's how it started. Laura and I were good at it, too. So eventually, it turned into weapon shipments and information. If we came back with good intel or whatever, they'd give us anything we wanted.” She fidgeted with her hands as she spoke, her nerves fluctuating. She wasn't as nervous talking about it as she had been in the past. 

“The people they sent you to get information from. They were dangerous?” 

“Yeah. Really dangerous sometimes.” 

“Did they ever…” he trailed off. He wasn't even sure what he was asking, but she picked up. 

“Why do you think I don't flinch when someone pulls a gun on me?” she asked, her voice nearly cracking. 

“Kenz…” 

“It wasn't all bad, though. I had amazing food, the best clothes. Jewelry and shoes. Basically anything I wanted.” 

“You don't exactly seem like the girly type,” he said, moving his hand to hers. He knew that she didn’t have it easy on Earth, but he didn’t realize how bad it was. 

“Hey, I can be plenty girly,” she teased. Her smile was mostly genuine. “I got to go to the best parties, drink the best wine. I was 14 when I met Laura. We were living the dream.” 

“I’m pretty sure there are old vids about that kinda life,” he said. 

“That’s why we never left. Men wanted us, women envied us. And yeah, we were doing illegal shit. But that life was a hell of a lot better than not knowing where you're going to sleep at night. We traveled and partied like rock stars. Laura was more, involved, I guess. Her and Jake were loud and crazy and the life of the party. Not that I couldn’t hold my own with them,” she added. 

“You still talk to them?” 

“Laura and I still talked once I joined the Alliance. But it’s hard. She never really left that life, and I can’t exactly be openly conversing with a criminal. Jake’s the same.” 

“And the other girl? Gina?” 

She froze, took a deep breath. “She was, uh… killed. Right in… front of me.” 

“Shit, Kenzie. I’m sorry,” he offered. She squeezed his hand gently, giving him a small smile. 

“It’s alright. Roach killed her right before I turned 18. So I ran. I hid for about 3 weeks, constantly moving around, then enlisted the day I turned 18. I couldn’t be a part of it anymore if they were going to kill a girl for not wanting to sleep with some old fucker,” she explained. 

“They were making you sleep with people for them?” 

“Yeah… we tried to draw the line there. It worked a lot of the time.” 

“Did you ever…”

“Did I sleep with anyone to get information? God, no. I only sleep with people if I really want to,” she said. She glanced at him, her smile flirtatious. He grinned back, then sat up straighter. “They tried  _ so _ hard to get me to, though. Apparently the Reds were famous for having a ‘blonde with nice tits’.” 

“Fuck, did they even treat you like a person?” 

“At first they did. I mean, I was 14 when I joined. And before then I was just bouncing from house to house, not really fitting in. They gave a scared little girl a place to stay and food to eat, all I had to do was drop some drugs off now and then. Police never expected this little blonde girl to be a drug pusher, so I slipped right under the radar.” 

“God, Gunny’s 15. Can’t imagine her doing this,” he said, offhand. 

“Gunny?” 

“Oh, Gunny. My sister, Hilary.” 

“You have a sister?”

“Yeah,” he sighed. 

“What’s she like?!” she exclaimed. At this point, Jeff was the closest thing she had to family, so she wanted to know all about his family. And it would be nice to change the subject from her shitty past. 

“She’s tough. Mom died when she was, uhh, three? Four? She thinks she can be a better pilot than me,” he said, scoffing slightly. 

“Well, she’s got big shoes to fill. But if anyone can beat you, I bet it would be her.” He rolled his eyes, but his eyes were back on her immediately. She just told him that one of her best friends was murdered in front of her, but she still has a smile, that big, gorgeous smile. She really was a ray of sunshine in this dark galaxy. He rattled off story after story about her, and she listened closely, as if trying to remember every detail. He knew that there was a chance that Gunny and his dad weren’t going to survive, knew that if they didn’t get off Tiptree in time, well. But he didn’t tell her. It didn’t matter right now. What mattered right now was her perfect smile. And maybe, if he kept her smiling, he would be able to introduce her to his family. And just maybe, he found what he’s fighting for. 


	19. Burgers and Fries

McKenzie sat in the chair next to Jeff on the bridge. Normally occupied by EDI, the seat was half-turned towards Joker. They had talked idly as he effortlessly piloted the Normandy through the galaxy towards the Citadel. But she was tired, so goddamn tired. To say the last twenty-four hours were insane would be an understatement. McKenzie had just ran directly underneath a reaper, and was only two inches away from being stepped on by said reaper. Her left hand was broken, more thanks to the reaper. James had to physically hold her back to get medi-gel on her hand before she ran to the Shroud. And then, she had to watch Mordin go up the elevator to finish synthesizing the cure, watch him ride and elevator to his death. Then, the cure was distributed; the genophage was over. They did it. The memories replayed in her mind as she dozed off.

_She watched the shroud collapse, knowing that her friend wasn’t leaving the tower. A hand was placed on her shoulder, gently, by krogan standards. “Shit, Shepard. You really did it,” Wrex said, slow and steady, like always. She cracked a smile, forcing herself not to dwell._

_“You owe me a drink, by the way. I almost got stepped on by a reaper for this,” she joked. His laughter roared, and she allowed herself a laugh, as well._

_“Hell, Shepard. I owe you the whole damn bottle!” he exclaimed. She was suddenly swept off her feet, being swung around by Wrex. His loud laughter filled her ears and heart as he spun her a few times. “Whoo!” he roared as he slowed. He put her back down, and she moved her hair out of her face._

_“Commander Shepard,” Eve’s regal voice was suddenly in her ears. McKenzie spun around, suddenly realizing she didn’t look as presentable as she wanted; her bun was half undone, dried blood covered her, and she was missing the gauntlet that was in pieces. But Eve glided towards her, and Kenzie could sense a smile. “They say you are the first ray of sunshine after a week of rain. But Tuchanka has had a thousand years of rain. That first ray of sunshine means more to us than you might ever know. You have given us hope, Commander. A gift I will be sure not to squander,” she said. Her head suddenly dropped. “A pity about Mordin.”_

_“He wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. Besides, someone else might have gotten it wrong,” McKenzie stated. She felt a breeze, and turned her face towards it. She looked at the debris from the Shroud, and blinked back a tear. She would have to mourn later. Probably what he would have wanted, anyway._

“Kenz, you alright?”

She opened her eyes, immediately looking towards the sound of Jeff’s voice. “What? Yeah, I’m fine,” she answered, rubbing her eyes as she sat up in the chair. He glared at her, brow furrowed.

“How’s the hand?” he asked, nodding towards her. She lifted it up slightly, inspecting the bandages that Chakwas had expertly wrapped around her hand. “Scale of one to ten.”

“Um, probably a 5,” she replied. He nodded, turning his attention back to the display in front of him.

“You know you can go up and sleep right?”

“I tried,” she said, sighing. “If I’m not accidentally laying on my hand, I’m having nightmares.”

“As soon as we get to the Citadel, you’re going to complain about how tired you are,” he said, his eyes not leaving the console.

“I know, but I just have to meet with the Salarian Councillor,” she said, but was interrupted by a yawn. Joker glared at her again, his nose scrunching up slightly. She knew she was being stubborn, but she didn’t want to sleep alone. “Fuckin’ Udina,” she said under her breath. He snorted.

“When we figure out time travel, I’m going back and putting money on Udina messing everything up for us,” he said. She chuckled, her tired laugh making him smile.

“We should have put money on it. There wasn’t any doubt,” she said, crossing her arms. “I think we should be bookies when this is all over,” she added. He snapped at her, his pointer finger extending at her as he finished.

“We’re gonna be so freakin’ rich, babe.” She giggled again, a laugh escaping his lips, as well.

“Do you keep any snacks up here?” she asked, suddenly changing the subject.

“I think there’s a thing of almonds behind you,” he said. She spun the chair around, biting her lip as she stood up. “We need more real food, though. No more of this healthy crap.”

“Sorry we can’t have burgers and fries every day, honey,” she said as she searched the work station. She found the short tin can, happy to find there were more than a few nuts inside.

“Please don’t mention burgers. That’s all I want right now,” he pleaded, turning towards her as she sat back down.

“You do realize you can get them on the Citadel, right?” She sat back down, resting her feet on the structure to her left. She popped an almond into her mouth. He turned his chair to her.

“Baby, let me take you out as soon as you’re finished with the Councillor,” he said, a smirk appearing on his face.

“This have anything to do with the fact that I just told you there are burgers there?”

“I just want to take my beautiful girlfriend out to dinner, that’s all,” he said. Before he knew it, an almond was being lobbed towards him. He awkwardly tried to catch it in his mouth. She laughed, a genuine laugh; a laugh that made Jeff believe in fairy tales.

“Bullshit,” she said in between laughs.

“You’re such a brat,” he said, keeping his mouth open as she wound up to throw another almond at him. She smiled big as she aimed for his mouth. She tossed it, and it landed in his mouth. He threw up his hands, her laughter filling the bridge perfectly. “She saves the Citadel, then stops the Collectors! The genophage is cured!” His voice rang out, mocking a sports announcer. “But, McKenzie’s greatest achievement to date was tossing an almond into her pilot’s mouth!”

“It helps when you have a big mouth to aim for,” she said. She tossed a few almonds into her mouth, both of them getting out their remaining laughs.

“Ha, ha,” he said dryly. He looked over at her, a smug grin on her face. He shook his head as he looked back at the controls. He flipped through several displays, studying one for a few moments. “We’re gonna hit the relay in, uhh, 20 minutes. Should be docked at the Citadel in just under an hour, babe,” he said. She nodded, eating a few more almonds as she stood up. She placed the can back where she found it.

“Okay, I’m gonna take a shower and then see how everyone’s doing,” she said, walking back towards him. She held the back of the chair and leaned down to kiss his cheek. “Don’t kill us,” she said as she pulled back.

“No promises,” he said with half a smile. Her non-broken hand lingered on his shoulder as she walked away from the bridge. He took a deep breath as he fully concentrated on flying. He wished that there was more he could do for her, but he figured that a few laughs couldn’t hurt. Scrolling through the displays once more, he found a string of messages between them. He typed out, “ _Little offended you didn’t invite me to shower with you,_ ” and hit send. He sat back and waited for her reply.

“ _Maybe next time, Flight Lieutenant._ ” The messaged popped up, and he just knew she was smiling when she wrote it. In fact, he could picture her face as if she was saying it out loud, teasing him with his rank. He pulled up the Normandy’s controls again, careful not to let his mind wander to her in the shower too much.


	20. He Gets Bossy

“Fuck,” McKenzie huffed. No other words could describe what had just happened. She carefully took off the unfamiliar gauntlets, unwrapping the old bandages that were mangled in them. She was never unprepared, but a Cerberus coup attempt on the Citadel? Not something she really planned for. Her broken hand was throbbing as she applied another dose of medi-gel. The Presidium was in shambles around her, but she had to sit down. Had to take a breath. Liara watched her, unsure of what to say. 

“Are you alright, Shepard?” the asari asked. McKenzie let out a breath. 

“I’m fine.” She leaned back against the wall she had slid down. Her eyes darted around the Presidium. “What the fuck just happened?” 

“As soon as I figure it out, I’ll let you know.” Commander Bailey suddenly stood by her. She looked up at him. “What’s up with that hand?” 

“Tuchanka. Reaper broke a wall and a piece of it fell on me. Never got a chance to heal,” she said, finally feeling the effects of the medi-gel. She gave her left hand a shake, hoping she could get rid of the pain that way. 

“Here,” he said, extending his arm out to her. She took it and he pulled her up. “You look like hell.” 

“Always charming, Bailey.” 

“The Normandy’s docked. D-24, like always. Go get cleaned up and then come to my office. I’ve got my guys clearing out the rest of Cerberus.” 

“Alright. Thanks, Bailey,” she said, wiping her head with the back of her hand. 

“Thank you, Commander.” 

McKenzie, Liara and James walked back to the Normandy, all a little shell-shocked. She couldn’t wait to get back and shower. They approached the elevator, all of them taking a deep breath as the doors closed. “Seriously. What the fuck just happened?” she asked. 

“You fucking shot Udina,” James said, almost sounding like he didn’t believe it. 

“I believe McKenzie had wanted to do that for a while,” Liara added. McKenzie chuckled, realizing that Liara was right. 

“Yeah, it felt a little good,” she admitted. She took another deep breath. “Why can’t we have a few boring days? You all realize we just took down a reaper with the mother of all Thresher Maws like ten hours ago right?” The elevator stopped, and the doors opened. McKenzie’s omni-tool beeped, and she looked at the message that she just recieved. 

“ _ Thane is in surgery now, will let you know when he is out _ ,” she read. 

“ _ Appreciate it, Bailey _ ,” she replied. “I hate walking through the CIC with armor on,” she murmured. They walked towards the Normandy, down the docking tube. “Shit, Jeff’s gonna see me like this,” she said. 

“Is that a bad thing?” Liara asked as they entered the airlock. 

“He’ll be worried about my hand, probably. And he gets bossy when he’s worried.” She turned to James. “Don’t tell him I said that,” she said quickly. 

“Cross my heart, Lola,” he said with a smirk. 

“Fuck it, I’m just going upstairs. I’ll bring my armor down later,” she sighed. “I need a nap. Or a drink.” 

“Sleep would be better,” Liara offered. The airlock opened. McKenzie was about to say something to Liara when she heard the doors to the bridge open. 

“Kenz!” Joker shouted. “You alright?” She could hear him standing up, but she quickly walked over to him. 

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she answered. He looked her up and down quickly, eyes lingering on her hand. 

“Fine? You look like shit,” he said, pulling her broken hand towards him. 

“Love you more,” she said, rolling her eyes. 

“Take this stupid armor off,” he said while trying to pry off her armored sleeve. 

“Buy me a drink first,” she said dryly. She released the arm of her armor, catching it before it fell on the floor. He rolled up the sleeve of the thin shirt she wore under her armor, inspecting her wrist and forearm. 

“What the fuck happened?” he asked. She chuckled, placing the arm in his chair. 

“It’s all a blur, honestly.” He wrapped a bandage around her hand, having broken enough bones to know how to properly wrap her hand. “I have to shower and then go back to Bailey’s office,” she said as she watched him. He might have been bossy, but she loved that he was so attentive to her. She felt herself relax slightly as he finished with the bandage. “Fuck, I have to go check on Thane too...” 

“What happened?” he asked, eyes darting up to hers. 

“This stupid Cerberus assassin. Put a sword right through him. He’s at the hospital but I…” 

“Relax, babe,” he said, his voice quiet. She took a deep breath. “Go take a shower. You’ll feel better.” 

“Yes sir,” she answered. “You’re gonna have to wrap my hand again.” 

“Lucky for you, I’m good at it,” he replied. He took her shoulders and pushed her lightly through the doors. “Now go.” 

“Thank you,” she said quietly as he turned back around. 

“You’re welcome. Call me up when you’re done.” 

Twenty minutes later, McKenzie turned off the water. She really did feel better. She wrung out her hair, her hair that was getting too long. The last thing on her mind was getting a haircut, though. She wrapped a towel around her body and stepped out of the bathroom. She wasn’t as surprised as she should have been when she saw Jeff sitting on the couch. “Hey,” she said quietly. 

“Do you feel better?” he asked, putting down the datapad he was reading. 

“I do,” she said, walking towards him. She noticed the assortment of bandages on the table, along with a bottle of water and several chocolate wrappers. 

“Alright, let me see,” he said, holding his hand out to her. She used her good hand to hold up the towel, reaching to him with the other. She sat down next to him, her legs tucked under her. She sighed deeply as Jeff grabbed a rolled up bandage from the table. 

“Thanks for this,” she said. She was quiet, not used to this level of attention. He didn’t have to do any of this for her, could have had Dr. Chakwas take care of her. She watched his face as he concentrated on her hand, carefully wrapping the bandage. His eyes narrowed as he focused, and she felt her heart start to beat a little faster. She suddenly felt overwhelmed; no one had ever loved her as much as he does, and she’s never loved anyone as much as she loves him. She was glad that she got to see this side of him. She buried her head in the crook of his neck, the faint smell of his cinnamon body wash filling her nose. She took a deep breath against him, feeling more safe than she had ever felt before. 

“You okay, babe?” he asked, his hands growing more gentle as he wrapped her knuckles. 

“I love you,” she blurted out. It wasn’t a secret, but this one meant more than most other times she told him. He chuckled, turning his head slightly to kiss her damp hair. 

“I love you too. I’m glad you didn’t hurt yourself even more,” he said. 

“I am too,” she said, picking her head back up. She curled up to him as best she could, scooting closer to him awkwardly. 

“I’m almost done, just wait a few… ah, never mind,” he said as he shifted his leg. 

“Did you eat all of my chocolate?” 

“I would never,” he answered. She just knew he was lying, and smiling. She laughed quietly. “I’ll buy you some more.” 

“Yeah, you will.” It was his turn to laugh. He reached out towards the table, grabbing the small metal clip to secure the wrap. 

“How does that feel?” She moved her hand around. It wasn’t too tight, but it still was doing something. 

“Perfect,” she replied. He gave her a quick smile, and brought his lips to hers. 

“Alright. As much as I enjoy having you sit here in nothing but a towel, you should get dressed,” he said after pulling back. 

“Okay. By the way, we’re probably going to have to hang out here for a few days while everything gets sorted out,” she said, standing up. 

“Can we go to the bar tonight then?”

“Fuck yes,” she said, walking towards her desk. With Jeff practically moved into her cabin, it had been much messier than usual. Her uniform was somewhere on the desk, probably.  

“Good. I’m going to shower, then. I’ll meet you there once you’re done being Commander Sunshine,” he said, taking off his shirt. He walked towards her, and kissed her cheek. “Good luck baby.” 

“Thank you. For everything,” she said, finding a clean pair of underwear. He turned around, grinning. He closed the small gap between them, holding her waist. He kissed her again, and she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. She parted her lips against his, and he followed her lead. He suddenly pulled his lips away, though.

“Uh-uh. I’m gonna go shower now before I regret not getting in there with you before,” he said. She giggled, and he backed away from her. Her towel, which had been held up only by his body pinned against hers, started to fall down. She grabbed it before it was completely pooled around her ankles, but not before her breasts were exposed. Jeff groaned loudly, completly turning around to walk to the bathroom. “Aaand I regret it. Get out of here, you beautiful asshole.” 

“This is my cabin!” she loudly pointed out. 

“I’ll see you later,” he called out, not looking away from the bathroom door. She got dressed, her smile never fading. The door to the bathroom opened and closed, and she sighed once she heard the water running. He might be bossy when he’s worried, but McKenzie was beyond grateful for it. And him. 


	21. Rumors

Walking into the loud club, McKenzie quickly scanned the room for Jeff. Purgatory was loud, but still part of the Presidium. _Sickeningly uptight_ , Aria T’Loak calls it. And while  McKenzie couldn’t disagree with the asari’s opinion, the bar there still served the best, and strongest, drinks. She looked towards Aria’s booth, giving her a quick nod before turning to the lower bar. She figured her boyfriend wouldn’t have ascended the massive staircase towards the upper bar. Sure enough, she saw him leaning against the bar, trying to get the bartender’s attention.

Her pace quickened as she walked towards him. The music drummed in her ear, the sounds of slurred speech softened by the bass. “No, walk away again. That’s fine,” Jeff said, mostly to himself. She smiled, pressing her chest to his back. Her hands wrapped around his waist gently.

“Come here often, Soldier?” she asked, her flirting making him laugh. He stood up straight, and she moved to his side, her hands dragging along his body.

“Well, that depends,” he started. He smirked as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Do you?” Her smile was wide as he kissed her.

“You should buy me a drink before you try that again,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. He chuckled as he pulled his head away.

“So what are you drinking?” He put one arm across her shoulder as she turned to face the bar. Their sides were pressed together, both of them lightly leaning into the other.

“After the day I’ve had, something very, very strong.”

“Yes, Ma’am,” he said. She laughed, turning her head slightly as the bartender came over to them. He ordered their drinks, and she quickly surveyed the people around her. A habit since she was young; she always needed to know who was in her immediate area in a club or bar. “Of course, my super hot girlfriend walks in and the bartender couldn’t come over quicker…” he said, under his breath. He felt a gentle nudge from her elbow on his ribs. She noticed a couple of patrons staring at her and Jeff, so she stood closer to him. He looked down at her when he felt her push against him.

“Those guys over there are staring at us,” she whispered. He couldn’t help but smile as he leaned over.

“Baby, they’re staring at you,” he said.

“Stop,” she pleaded, her cheeks growing impossibly red.

“Or, they’re staring at me, wondering how I’m the one that gets to grab your butt,” he added. Before she could even respond, his palm was on her bottom, squeezing it. She swatted his hand away, laughing the entire time.

“You’re such a dick,” she informed him.

“It’s one of my more charming qualities.” The bartender came back over with two drinks, filled to the brim with a blue liquid. They reached out, their hands wrapping around the glass. The bartender came back, two more drinks in his hand. Much taller than the others, McKenzie recognized the drink immediately.

“Long Island Iced Teas?”

“Back on the SR-1 you said that they were your favorite.” Kenz’s heart skipped a beat, as it always did when someone remembers small details about her. “And with me being the best boyfriend ever, I figured you would want one after the day you’ve had.”

“You really are the best,” she said, surveying the drink in her hand. “And this is?”

“Some Asari liquor. It was expensive, that's all you need to know,” he said, shaking his head slightly.

“Are you spoiling me Jeff Moreau?”

“Tonight I am. Don’t get used to it, though. Your head is perfect the size it is,” he said, holding his glass up towards hers. She laughed, her head leaning back slightly. He couldn’t help but want to immediately press his lips to her neck, but that would have to wait. She tapped their glasses together. “Bottoms up,” he said. They both knocked back the shot with ease, placing the glasses back down forcefully.

“I feel less stressed already.”

“Can’t wait to see how you feel after a few more of these, then,” he said, while motioning towards their second drinks. She laughed again.

“Maybe my hand won’t hurt as much,” she said. She took the drink in her  less-broken hand, sipping it slowly. Suddenly, Jeff was being pushed towards her. She held his chest gently, and he simply stumbled towards her. Before he could even turn around to see who pushed him, their ears were both being filled with apologies.

“Yeah, yeah. It’s cool,” Jeff said, adjusting his hat slightly.

“You good?” she asked. He nodded while taking a sip from his drink.

“Yeah. Apparently all it takes is a Cerberus attack on the Citadel to get people to pay attention to the war. Not where they’re walking, though.”

“Come on. Like no one’s ever bumped into you at a club before,” she said. She turned so her back was against the bar, her side flush against his front. He leaned down slightly, his arm coming around her back.

“Sure, but look at everyone else. Can’t you see the desperation? This isn’t happy dancing. This is ‘forget my problems’ dancing.” She listened to him, her broken hand playing with the straw of her drink. “Look at the arms,” he added, pointing to a group of Alliance soldiers. One threw their hands up, yelling about… something. “If a guy waves his arms like that, he’s worried about a lot more than looking stupid on the dance floor.”

“Do you have a degree in psychology that you never told me about?” she asked.

“No, you’re still the smarter one.”

“Hey, I never went to school. Like. At all,” she said, sounding surprised. He chuckled, and Kenzie knew it was a nervous chuckle. She might not have went to school, but her life before she joined the Alliance taught her a lot. Especially about people.

“Yeah, well. You’re better off not going to school. School dances were the worst,” he said.  “Years of sitting there, watching kids awkwardly dance with each other,” he added, much quieter.

“If you didn’t like them, why did you go?”

“The hope that some hot girl would decide to dance with the cripple,” he said, his tone flat. She looked at him, sympathy in her eyes. “It was mostly because Mom really wanted me to go to them. And I couldn’t disappoint my mother because I’m not an asshole,” he added. He started to move his hand up and down her back, trying to distract himself and possibly her. She quickly looked up at him, then brought her drink to her lips. She gulped down a portion of it.

“Come on,” she said, moving away from the bar. She drank again, the drink nearly finished.

“Why are we chugging?” he asked, after he followed her lead.

“I hate holding a drink while I’m dancing. And I’ve learned the hard way not to leave your drink on the bar and then start drinking it again,” she said. She knocked back the rest of the drink.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down. What are you doing?”

“Hot girl is gonna dance with the cripple. Now let’s go!” she exclaimed. She gently tugged on his arm, pulling him towards the dance floor.

“No. No, no.”

“Come on! Let’s dance,” she pleaded.

“Kenz,” he whined.

“Oh, so you’ll make the Normandy dance, but not your girlfriend?!”

“That’s not… it’s just an expression…”

“Please! Just a few minutes.” He stared at her, not wanting to budge. Then she pouted her lips slightly, taking a half step toward him.

“Alright, alright,” he said under his breath, holding out his hand to her. Her pout quickly turned into a smile. “You and your dumb pouty face,” he muttered.

“It’s the one weapon the Alliance doesn’t issue…” she said, leading him towards the smaller dance floor.

“That’s cute. You just come up with that?”

“Please. I’ve been waiting to use that one for years,” she joked. She pulled him close, putting his hands around her waist. She started to sway her hips, perfectly in time with the beat. He mimicked her, holding her back to his chest.

“You know… there’s a rumor going around.”

“Yeah? What about?”

“You,” he said. He moved his hands lower, slowly dragging his fingers over her uniform. She moved her hair to one side of her head. He brought his lips closer to her ear. “The rumor is, that you can’t dance.” She chuckled, leaning her head back against his shoulder. They slowed slightly, no longer in time with the beat of the music. She covered one of his hands with hers, the other reaching behind his head, carefully caressing the back of his neck.

“You should know better than to listen to rumors, Flight Lieutenant,” she teased. He let out a low groan, drowned out by the music. Even before they got together, she _never_ called him by his rank. But now, she started to call him that with that tone of hers, that tone that made him acutely aware of how attractive she was.

“Just because I listen to them doesn’t mean I believe them,” he offered.

“And now that you’re able to form your own opinion about my dancing?”

“Well, you’re definitely better than me. Although, having a body like yours certainly helps,” he said, his grip on her tightening. “But, you look kind of stupid,” he said. She turned around in his arms, mouth agape.

“I didn’t even have my hands up!”

“Nah, but you are dancing with me.”

“Don’t you start with that…” she warned.

“Hey, you being out of my league isn’t a rumor. It’s just true. But I’m willing to overlook your lapse in judgement,” he said. She brought her arms up around his neck, rolling her eyes as she pulled his head closer to hers.

“Yeah, well. You look pretty stupid right now, too.”

“Oh? And why is that?”

“Because you aren’t kissing me right now.”

“Right. I definitely should be doing that right now,” he said, pulling her hips close.

“Yeah, you should,” she said as she closed her eyes. He quickly pressed his lips to hers, her lips sticky from the liquor. He parted his lips, deepening their kiss slightly. They suddenly hear cheering from the people around them. They both pulled back, smiles on both of their lips. “See. Neither of us look stupid anymore.”

“I guess not,” he said. She pulled back, and led him towards the door. “I knew you said you only wanted to dance for a few minutes, but I thought we could have a few more drinks.”

“Well, since you’re so familiar with rumors…” she started. He rolled his eyes, his legs following her wherever she would lead him. “I heard a rumor that Commander Shepard is sleeping with her pilot. Any truth to that?”

He felt her intertwine her fingers with his as they walked. He probably had to goofiest grin on his face, but he couldn’t care less. They exited the club and he used the panel to call a cab. “You know. I have heard that. Can’t confirm it, though.” She chuckled. “If you wanted, I could definitely look into it.” He turned towards her as he pressed the last button.

“Maybe we should look into it together.”

“If that’s what you want,” he said, his hand cradling her neck.

“That is… definitely what I want, Jeff.” He looked towards the skycar that was landing near them.

“Ladies first,” he said. She giggled as she entered the car, Jeff following her. The doors closed, and Jeff soon found Kenzie in his lap. “Thank God for autopilot.”


	22. Annoyingly Modest

“Hey, McKenzie. I’m coming up with beers and there’s nothing you can say to stop me.” Steve Cortez’s voice was suddenly in McKenzie’s cabin. She chuckled, pulling her blanket off. 

“Yes, sir,” she teased. She climbed off the bed, tossing on Jeff’s sweatshirt over her bra. The elevator doors opened, quickly followed by her cabin doors. “That better be good beer,” she said, clearing off spots on the couch for them to sit. Keeping the cabin clean wasn’t high on her priority list, and it certainly wasn’t high on Jeff’s. 

“I’m the procurement specialist on board, ma’am. It’s the best I could find,” he said as he walked in. She dropped one of her shirts as she carried a pile to the chair near her bed. 

“That’s what I like to hear.” She turned back towards the couch, still seeing it half covered in dirty clothes. “Ah, screw it. On the bed.” 

“You’re asking the wrong pilot into bed,” he joked. 

“Ha, ha,” she said, dryly. He took off his boots and sat at the edge of the bed. The fleece blanket that was covering her before was back on her legs while she sat cross legged, facing him. He pulled out a bottle opener from his pocket, flipping the caps off with ease. “Thank you,” she said, taking the bottle he motioned towards her. 

“Now I know you don’t like it when people call you Sunshine-” 

“Steve,” she started. 

“Relax. It’s just this once,” he said. He held up the beer towards her. “But I’m starting to realize why they call you that. So thank you for making me see the sunshine in my life.” 

“Steve you don’t have to keep thanking me,” she said, tapping her bottle to his. They both took a swig. 

“I’ll stop thanking you when I’m dead. Which, hopefully, will be in a long, long time.” 

“I’ll drink to that,” she said, her smile shining from behind the bottle. 

“So how did you get the nickname? I mean it’s very fitting, but who called you that first?” he asked. He readjusted his position slightly. 

“Anderson. One day he called me that, and I’m pretty sure it was just because of my hair,” she recalled. 

“Come on, James told me what Kahlee Sanders said about you being ‘the first ray of sunshine after a week of rain’,” he retorted. 

“Well now I have to kill James,” she said, smiling as she took a sip. 

“Come on, what’s the story?” 

She sighed. “There isn’t one reason he calls me that,” she explained. “He always says that my optimism was ‘refreshing’.” Even with the bottle in her hand, she made air quotes. “It might have been during my N7 training.” 

“You’ve known Anderson that long?” he asked, laying down at the foot of her bed. 

“Yep. Just over ten years. I was twenty-one when I met him.” 

“He spoke very highly of you during the retrofits. Seems like you two are close,” he said, almost hesitant. 

“Closest thing I have to have a father. He means a lot to me,” she said, taking a long sip of beer. 

“And…” 

“ _ And?”  _

“What does he think of you and Joker?” he asked, a smile forming on his face. She matched his smile, a chuckle escaping her lips. 

“He was just surprised it took us this long, apparently,” she said. She fidgeted with the blanket. 

“Alright you have to tell me the whole story. You know enough about me and my relationships, time for me to hear about yours,” he said. 

“There's not much to tell! We just… sort of happened, I guess?” 

“Oh, come on. You couldn't have just decided to love Joker one day. No one could,” he teased. They both laughed, drinking more beer. 

“No, I didn't just wake up one day with feelings for him.” 

“But when did you realize it?” he asked. 

“God, I don't remember. I mean, I always thought he was cute. And funny. He always made me laugh,” she started. Steve watched her, her cheeks a light pink. He noticed the smile that grew on her face when she talked about him. “Did anyone ever tell you what Liara first said when she got on the Normandy?” 

“Don't think so,” he responded. 

“Well, she was on Therum, and the planet was basically a big volcano. Barely made it off in time, and Joker was a big help with that.” She told the story, rambling slightly. “Anyway, Joker made some joke about lava melting our ship. Liara goes ‘We almost died and your pilot is making jokes?!’ and I just about lost it,” she said, her voice littered with laughs as she told the story. Steve laughed too, although it was more at her laughing than the actual story. “Have you heard something more like Joker in your life? Because I haven't,” she said, lifting the bottle to her lips. 

“You do seem the closest to him out of anyone. If anyone knows, it's you.” 

“Yeah, well. Before EDI, Joker was the voice in my helmet while I was on the ground.” 

“I'm so sorry you had to go through that,” he joked.  

“Say what you will, but he's still the best damn pilot for this ship,” she said. “He is kind of an asshole, but he's the best guy for the job.” 

“So you two were close on the SR-1?” he asked, knocking back the rest of his beer. He regret not bringing more. 

“Yeah, we were,” she said, stopping as if she had more to say. 

“That’s it?” 

She sighed. “The entire time we were going after Saren and Sovereign, we were so stressed. Obviously, I thought he was cute and I flirted when I could,” she admitted. They both laughed. “But I had to focus. So nothing ever happened beyond that.” She finished her beer, and looked down at Steve. He had a knowing smile on his face. 

“Until?” he asked. 

“Until… after the whole Citadel thing,” she said, a coy smile appearing on her face. 

“That's what you call it? The whole Citadel thing?” he asked, surprised. 

“What else should I call it?” she asked, giggles littering her voice. 

“You really are annoyingly modest,” he said.

“Shut up,” she said. 

“Anyway…. What happened after the whole Citadel thing?” he asked, another fit of giggles leaving her mouth. 

“Well, I was in the hospital for a few days. He came by to see me, make sure I was doing okay. When they released me, he suggested we go get some real food. He knows how bad hospital food can be,” she explained. 

“So it wasn't a date?” 

“Not really.” He cocked an eyebrow at her. “It definitely didn't start as a date. But…” 

“Too much flirting for just friends?” 

“Exactly. But then we were back on duty and then… Alchera.” 

“I see,” he said, not needing her to go on. 

“But then he was there with Cerberus and I…. it wasn't like seeing an old friend. But not like seeing an ex either.” 

“But you guys got together while you stopped the Collectors, right?” he asked. 

“Yeah. But it was after the Collectors attacked the ship for the third time or whatever. We were about to go through the Omega-4 when we…” she trailed off. 

“You guys had sex right before a suicide mission?” he asked. 

“God, no. We just… made out. The sex was after the Collector base,” she admitted, giggling. 

“That’s a hell of a celebration,” he said, his tone dry, but his smile wide. 

“I thought so, too,” she said. They both adjusted their positions slightly. She sighed. “You should have brought more beer,” she noted. 

“My mistake,” he apologized. They laughed, while she grabbed both bottles and stood up. “So Anderson and Hackett are okay with you two being together?” 

“I know Anderson is. I don’t think Hackett cares too much. He knows that we can both be professional when it matters.” 

“Yeah, you two don’t seem like the super-PDA-type of couple,” he said. She adjusted the zipper on her hoodie. 

“Hey, I still need you all to respect me. I don’t care that everyone knows we’re together, but that doesn’t mean you guys should see us making out,” she said. She walked to the desk, grabbing a pair of socks on the chair. 

“True enough. If it works for you guys, that’s all that matters,” he said. He sat up straight, stretching his arms above his head. McKenzie’s omni-tool beeped as she finished pulling her socks on. 

“One day I will have more than a hour to myself,” she said to herself. He laughed, then stood up. 

“When that day comes, I’ll make sure no one bothers you.” 

“And that you’ll bring more than two beers,” she teased. 

“Anything for you, Commander,” he said, his smile wide. She held her arms out. He chuckled as he accepted her hug. 

“Thank you, Steve. This was really nice,” she said, quietly. 

“You’re welcome. And thank you. For everything.” 

“You’re welcome.” 


	23. Good Feelings

The alarm clock wasn’t nearly as unpleasant as usual. Probably because McKenzie had been awake for almost a half hour before it started blaring. She quickly shut it off, not wanting to wake Jeff up any earlier than she had to. He groaned, readjusting his position as he did. She chuckled, and rolled over towards him slowly. Her lips were pressed to his cheek. She carefully got up, going through her usual morning routine. 

She hummed quietly as she showered, trying not to think about the mission ahead of her. Ex-Cerberus scientists. McKenzie wanted to help them, and Specialist Traynor seemed confident of the information she was passing along. She was optimistic about this one. A feeling grew in her that this operation would be nothing her and her squad couldn’t handle. She sighed as she turned the water off, wringing out her hair. She really needed a haircut. 

Jeff stirred in bed as she brushed her teeth. For someone with brittle bones, he sure did move a lot in his sleep. She shook her head as she turned back into the bathroom. Her mind wandered slightly as she finished brushing her teeth. She wondered who she would bring on this mission, how long it was going to be until she could have another decent meal, if Jeff was alright. She told herself to ask him about his family after this mission. 

She put on some makeup, not as much as usual. Her hair had already dried, pros of having thin hair. She pulled on her uniform and made her way to the coffee machine in her cabin. As soon as she pressed the button, another groan was heard from the bed. She smiled wide, and made her way to the bed. “Morning, baby,” she said quietly, climbing onto the bed and straddling his hips. He groaned, louder this time. She giggled. “Come on, you gotta be downstairs in a half hour,” she whispered. He rubbed his still-closed eyes. She dragged her fingers delicately along his chest, his t shirt moving under her fingers just so. She tapped her hand to his chest lightly. “Up.” She was about to move off of him, when she noticed the slight pucker of his lips. She giggled again, leaning down and kissing his lips. He wrapped his arms around her back, pulling her close. He turned to his side with her in his arms, still never opening his eyes. 

“Hi,” he said, his voice still tired. She smiled as she readjusted herself, bringing her hand to his cheek. 

“Hi,” she mimicked. “Coffee is going already,” she informed him. 

“You’re the best,” he said, pulling her waist towards him. He buried his head in between the pillow and her head, his beard gently scratching the crook of her neck. She laughed as he got comfortable. 

“No,” she whined. “You gotta get up, come on.” He shook his head against her skin. “Yes. Go shower. The coffee will be perfect drinking temperature when you’re done.” 

He pulled back his head slightly, finally opening his eyes. “You plan on joining me in there?” he asked, trying hard to sound seductive. 

“I already showered and put makeup on, so no.” 

“You’re the only woman I know to put makeup on for a top-priority military mission,” he said, flipping over to his back again. 

“So?” 

“Blah blah, I think you’re beautiful without makeup. Blah blah, you don’t need it,” he started. He laughed when Kenzie laughed. “Am I a good boyfriend yet?” 

“If it annoys you that much, I’m just going to do it more,” she said, sitting up. 

“Brat,” he said under his breath. He sighed. 

“You’re the best boyfriend ever,” she said, leaning over to give him one more kiss. “But you have to be my favorite pilot now.” She climbed out of the bed. 

“Where are we going?” he asked. He ran his hands over his face. 

“Gellix. Ex-Cerberus scientists,” she informed him. The coffee was just about finished, so she walked over towards it. 

“Just make EDI take the helm. Let me sleep,” he whined, pulling a pillow over his head. 

“Oh my God, you’re the brat,” she said, walking back towards him. She grabbed the pillow and threw it towards the other side of the bed. “I want you to fly. Come on, get up lazy,” she teased. He groaned loudly, finally sitting up. He stretched his arms above his head, yawning as he did. 

“How are you so freakin’ chipper in the mornings,” he said, scratching his head. 

“Knowing it annoys you makes it all worthwhile,” she said, the grin on her face making him groan. 

“You’re so lucky you’re hot,” he said, moving his legs over the edge of the bed. She laughed, then turned her attention to the coffee. He sat at the edge for a few seconds, rolling his ankles a few times each. He looked towards the knee braces he had on the end table, but stood up without putting them on. Using the other furniture to hold onto, he limped over to her. She poured coffee into both of their mugs, placing the pot back quickly. She smiled as she felt him getting closer to her. 

“Still can’t believe you drink your coffee black,” she said. He chuckled, wrapping his arms around her waist. He let out a grunt as he pulled her back towards him. He placed a sloppy kiss on her neck. 

“Love you,” he mumbled. She sighed. 

“I love you, too. I owe you one for waking you up this morning,” she said, turning around to face him. She placed her hands on his cheeks, fingers running through his beard slightly. “Ooh, you need to shave.” 

“I’m never shaving again.” 

“We should start keeping a count of who is more annoying,” she said.

“It’ll be nice for you to not be the best at something,” he said, running his hands up and down her back. She rolled her eyes, then turned around again. 

“You should shower, Jeff.” 

“Yes ma’am,” he answered. He slowly pulled his hands off, letting his fingers drag over her clothes. He heard her humming as he made his way to the shower, his heart rate increasing as he watched her through the glass. He smiled as he entered the bathroom. 

She found the milk from her tiny fridge, the fridge covered in dirty clothes. At least McKenzie was trying to keep her cabin clean, but the amount of effort being put into that task slowly dwindled. Pouring a few drops of milk into her bright pink mug, she leaned back against her desk. She blew over the top of the cup, chuckling as she examined the mug. Jeff had given it to her, barely able to keep a straight face as he did. The next time they docked at the Citadel, she had gotten him an even brighter mug, his orange. She then thought about how those were the only gifts they had ever gotten each other, which made her laugh a little louder. She placed the mug down, and attempted to find clean socks. 

Jeff emerged from the bathroom a few minutes later, holding a towel around his hips with one hand. “Kenz, come here. How does it look?” he asked, running his hand over his cheek. She walked over, taking a sip from her mug as she did. She placed the mug down on her desk, then brought her hands to his cheeks. She very carefully inspected his beard, running her thumbs across his skin. Her brown eyes dragged along, the hint of a smile appearing after a few long seconds. 

“It’s perfect,” she said, stealing a kiss from him before she turned away. He followed her, making his way down the stairs. He took a sip of his coffee, barely lifting the mug off the table. He found his uniform and a pair of clean boxers. At least, he was pretty sure they were clean. McKenzie read over the intel Traynor had given her one final time, while topping her mug off. Jeff pulled his shirt over his head. “Damn you get changed fast,” she said, picking up his hat from the desk. 

“I’m very efficient,” he said, walking towards her. He downed a portion of his mug, making a disgusted face after he did. “Shit sucks.” 

“Mine’s good. Maybe you should try yours with milk,” she said, quickly bringing her mug to her lips. He grabbed his hat from her hand quickly, his mug still in his hand. 

“But then you wouldn’t hear me complain,” he said with a grin, his sarcasm obvious. He drank some more coffee, gulping it down quick. 

“That honestly freaks me out that you can just chug black coffee.” He laughed and motioned the mug towards her. She shook her head, refilling his mug. 

“It’s a gift.” He placed his hat on his head. “Ready?” 

“Yep,” she said, putting the datapad in the crook of her elbow. They both made their way towards the elevator. “I have a good feeling about this,” she said, leaning against the wall. 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I do,” she said, confidently. 

“Good,” he said, his lips turned up slightly. They both took another sip. “Ready to be Commander?” 

“Always,” she said. Before the doors opened, she stood in front of him and kissed his lips. Before he could pull her close for another one, she was turned around and walking out of the elevator. His eyes fell to her hips, watched the extra swing in them as she walked up to the galaxy map. 

“You put in the coordinates yet?” he asked, following her out. He walked slowly around the map, watching her as he moved towards the bridge. 

“I just got here!” 

“I’m telling Anderson you’re slacking,” he said, his voice trailing off. She laughed, and Traynor even let out a giggle. 

“Shut up and fly the ship,” she ordered. 

“You got it,” he said, giving her a wave as he entered the bridge. She kept giggling quietly as she watched the door. Yeah, she had a very good feeling about today. 


	24. Shower

McKenzie stood at her terminal, mindlessly reading messages that were sent to her. Not that she didn’t appreciate the dozens of emails sent to her, thanking her for everything she did for whoever sent the message. It just so happened that she was slightly distracted. The past few weeks had been slightly more crazy than usual, which wasn’t unexpected. From seeing Jacob protecting a bunch of scientists, to Samara at a monastery for Ardat-Yakshi; her fight to stop the Reapers was becoming a full-on family reunion. Even Zaeed Massani made an appearance on the Citadel, a story Joker almost didn’t believe. 

She was distracted by the kisses on her neck she received in the elevator nearly an hour ago. Kenzie didn’t think grabbing crappy coffee from downstairs would turn either her or Jeff on, but he keeps surprising her. The amount of teasing Jeff liked to do to her was also surprising. She shook her head, trying to block the tingling in her neck when she thought about his lips. She shifted her weight, swinging her hips slightly. The beeping of her omni-tool pulled her back to reality. Her heart raced when she saw Jeff’s name appear as the sender of the message. Another shake of her head. She had to take care of this. 

She was disappointed when the message was completely professional, information about the next time they would need refueling. She sighed. “Traynor, I'm not getting anything done down here. I'll be upstairs,” she informed the woman on her right. 

“Alright. I’ll be here if you need anything, Commander,” she replied. 

“Thanks. Don't forget to take a break every once and awhile, though,” Kenzie reminded her as she walked towards the elevator. “Can't have you burn out. You're on a roll,” she said with a smirk. 

“Thank you, Commander,” she said, looking down. 

The elevator doors opened, and she slowly stepped in. She pressed the button for her cabin, turning around as the doors closed.  _ Deep breath Kenz _ , she thought to herself. Her back hit the wall, the cool metal a relief. “Cold shower. That's what I need,” she said to herself, quietly. A shower would be nice. Letting the water run over her, cooling her down. She stepped into her cabin, lifting her shirt over her head. Cool air hit her skin, goosebumps rising as she quietly shuddered. She ran her hand over her stomach, feeling the small bumps along her skin. An image flashed in her mind, Jeff’s hands replacing hers, his breath on her neck. She closed her eyes, reveling in her daydream. Her palms moved, a sigh escaped her lips. Suddenly, her eyes shot open, a groan replacing the sigh. “Fuck it,” she said. Her omni-tool was open. 

“ _ I’m showering in 5 minutes _ ,” she typed out. She bit her lip as she awaited his response. 

“ _ Have fun… _ ” he replied. 

“ _ You’re showering with me. _ ” She closed the tool, knowing he would be joining her. If not, well. She was just about to start taking care of this problem herself. 

She continued to undress herself. Her bra was about to fall, when her terminal started beeping. “You’ve got to be kidding,” she sighed. She leaned over the desk, reading the message quickly. It was pretty important, so she started typing a reply. She was going to laugh about this later; answering top-priority military messages in only a bra, about to get laid. The elevator doors opened, the ding coming faintly through the wall. 

The door opened, and the first thing through the door was Jeff’s hat, being tossed across the room. “Are you serious?” he exclaimed, surveying the sight in front of him. She laughed. 

“It’s important and I just got it. Gimme a minute to finish it,” she said. He came over to her, quicker than she expected. He stood behind her, his hands starting to move up and down her back. The goosebumps which had just receded were reappearing. She furiously typed, hoping there were no mistakes. She heard him kicking off his boots, aggressively stripping himself. She was about to sign the email when she felt his lips on her back. She closed her eyes, the sensation making her knees weak. She felt his fingers on the clasp of her bra, then quickly signed the email and sent it. “Done,” she said, frantically. She ripped off her bra, stood up straight, and turned around to face him. Their lips found each other quickly. 

“Hi,” he said, in between kisses. Their arms wrapped around each other, chests pressed together. She started walking him towards the shower. 

“Hey,” she said back, giggling. The door opened, and she kept walking. His back hit the cold metal gently. They kept kissing, hands roaming each other’s bodies quickly. His hand blindly reached for the handle, trying to turn on the water. He moved his mouth to her neck, making her moan. He found the handle, and she quickly pulled the hair tie out, letting her hair cascade down her back. The water started, the cold startling them both slightly. 

“Why didn’t you let this warm up first?”

“I was distracted!” she answered, pulling herself off of him. She adjusted the water temperature, the water quickly heating up. He limped over, letting the water run over his head. She gently pushed him aside, needing to do the same. She got her hair wet, making sure all of her head was rinsed. Brown eyes closed as she felt his hands snake around her waist again. His beard was scratching her neck, a feeling that was becoming more and more arousing. Her breathing was getting heavier. 

Jeff moved her so her back hit the wall. His hands moved down her hips, gripping her ass. He bit her neck softly, a moan escaping her mouth barely audible over the running water. Her fingers ran through his hair, nails dragging lightly across his scalp. “So,” he said, barely lifting his lips off her skin. “What brought this on?” he asked. She could feel his smug grin. 

“Well,” she started. He picked his head up slightly when she started to move. She turned him around, just forceful enough. He swallowed hard when her lips were on his neck. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you,” she admitted. She placed her hands on his chest, slowly dragging them down. “Thought a cold shower would help. But then….” She picked her head up. She kissed his lips, his chin, his chest. “I decided this would be more fun,” she said, drawing her words out. Lips kept moving down his chest, stomach, hips. He took a deep breath in anticipation when she knelt down in front of him. 

“Gotta agree with you on that,” he said. He watched her intently, a shock wave moving through him as she gripped his hard member. His groan was drowned out by the shower. Her hand was slow, her eyes focused. His breath was getting heavier, chest rising and falling as she moved her hand. She was damn good at this; her grip was perfectly tight, her hand rotated slightly as she pumped up and down. She looked up at him, their eyes meeting but not being able to look away. She gave him a half smile as she opened her mouth and took him in. 

His groan would have been heard through the wall. She chuckled, his cock still in her mouth, the vibration making his knees weak. As if they weren’t weak enough. The water ran over her head, some of it spraying onto his stomach. He tilted his head back, one hand finding its way into her wet hair. She was so damn good at this, quiet curses littering his breath. She took his entire length into her mouth, making muffled noises. “ _ Fuck _ ,” he hissed, his grip in her hair getting tighter. She removed him, catching her breath as she stroked him. She wasted no time taking him back in, her tongue moving over the sensitive tip carefully. He watched her, his eyes not focusing on anything in particular. Not the way she ran her tongue along the underside of his cock, not the way her fingers on her free hand dug into his thigh, not the way she looked up at him with him in her mouth. She took him in her mouth entirely again, nearly gagging when she did. His hips bucked towards her involuntarily. “Shit, come here,” he said. 

She stood up quickly, her head being pulled towards his. They both moaned against each other’s lips. She was turned around, and he pushed her against the wall rather forcefully. He pushed himself against her completely, their chests pushing against each other. The water ran down them slightly, neither of them being directly underneath the shower head. He gripped her thigh, pulling it up towards his hip. She wrapped her leg around him instinctively, his cock hard near her entrance. He moved his hip slightly, earning a high-pitched moan. He moved his other hand to her other thigh, tapping it lightly. She pulled her head back, curiously. “Gimme your other leg,” he said, slightly out of breath. 

“Babe, no,” she started. There was nothing for her to prop herself up on, and she didn’t want him to have to fully support her weight. “You’re going to hurt yourself.” 

“You’re not that heavy, you know,” he said. She giggled, but she quickly stopped. 

“Yeah, but what if you slip? I’ve got nothing to hold on to.”

“You have me,” he said, his smug grin forming again. She rolled her eyes. “Come on, babe. We’ll be fine. Trust me,” he said. She stared at him for a few seconds, then kissed his lips gently. 

“Stop if you’re hurting. Or if you think you’re going to drop me,” she said quietly. He kissed her, then pulled her other leg up. He arranged his arms so he could hold her up without bending his knees too much. She took a deep breath as she wrapped her arms around his neck. 

“Ready?” he asked. 

She nodded her head quickly, her worry dimming when she felt how steady he was. She moved one of her arms, her hand taking his cock and bringing it close to her folds. She ran the tip along her a few times, making herself moan quietly. She sucked in a breath as she pushed him inside of her slightly. The breath left her body as he pushed himself completely in. He readjusted his grip, and began thrusting slowly. 

It took a few minutes to find a comfortable position and rhythm. And once they did, it wasn’t long until Kenzie was close to climaxing. Jeff thrusted up into her, grunting loudly. He felt her nails dig into his back, her moans getting louder in his ears. He adjusted his footing slightly, able to thrust deeper. She dragged her nails down, the feeling egging him on. “Oh, fuck,” she moaned. He sped up, her breasts bouncing against his chest. His knees were giving out, but they were both close. She let out another high-pitched moan, dug her nails into his back. He slowed slightly as he felt her walls tense up around him. “Fuck… Jeff,” she whimpered. He wasn’t going to be far behind her, not with the way she was using his name. 

She kept moaning as he kept thrusting, his grunting becoming more rough. She loosened her fingers, running her palm down his back slightly. Her tired moans, the way her body went nearly limp, how tight she felt around him; nothing bolstered his pride quite like McKenzie finishing before him. He dug his fingers into her thighs, groaning loudly. He didn’t have time to pull out before he finished. “Shit,” he groaned. She was breathing heavy, exhales sounding more like moans. 

“Thank God for birth control,” she panted. His head fell against her shoulder. They caught their breath as he put her down. 

“Didn’t mean for that to happen,” he said, rolling his ankle. She smiled and kissed his lips. 

“It’s okay. I’m not complaining,” she assured him. She turned the handle of the shower so the water was cooler. They stood together under the water, stealing kisses as they rinsed off. He leaned over to pick up his body wash, but he almost fell over. She quickly caught him and helped him up. “Jeff!” 

“Ow. I’m fine,” he said, regaining his balance. “As fun as that was, we shouldn’t do that again.”

“Why? What’s wrong?” 

“My knee is killing me, and so is my ankle.” 

“Shit. I knew it was a bad idea,” she started. He pulled her close, cutting her off with a kiss. 

“Baby, I’m fine. Nothing is broken. I’m just going to have a worse limp that usual,” he assured her. She looked up at him, her eyes staring into his. He chuckled, pulling her into a hug. She sighed. “For the record. Totally worth it,” he whispered. She laughed. 

“Yeah. It was.” She leaned over and picked up the body wash. Opening the bottle, she squeezed a drop into her hand. Jeff pulled her hand and forced her to smear it onto his chest. “Hey, that was for me!”

“It’s my soap!” 

“That you left in my shower. Therefore, it’s mine now,” she said, trying to take the soap off of his chest. She managed to take a majority of it back, and began washing her body with it. He pulled her close, and rubbed his chest across hers. She threw her head back laughing. He chuckled as he kissed her cheek. She picked up the bottle again, getting another drop and giving it to Jeff. They finished washing each other, and rinsed off. Kenzie grabbed her face wash, while he stepped out of the bathroom. He dried off, slowly limping towards the bed. 

She finished washing her face, turning off the water. She took a deep breath before she turned around and exited the bathroom. “You don’t have any beer in the fridge,” he noted. 

“And?” She picked up the other towel and wrapped it around her body. 

“I could go for a beer right now,” he said. She looked at him, smiling at the sight. He was propped against the pillows, clad only in dark blue boxers. His hands behind his head, he smiled as their eyes met. 

“Enjoying the show?” she asked. He cupped his hands around his mouth. 

“Lose the towel!” he yelled, both of them laughing as he brought his hands back down. She turned around, and looked back at him seductively. He raised an eyebrow at her. She chuckled as she slowly pulled down the towel. He crossed his ankles, clearly enjoying the show. It was completely off, and being tossed at his head before Jeff knew it. She laughed loudly as she quickly pulled on a t shirt. He pulled the towel off his head. She was pulling on a pair of his boxers when he finally looked at her again. He tossed the towel back. She giggled as she brought it back to the bathroom. “Seriously. I could go for a beer,” he reminded her. 

“You have to fly again soon!” She walked back towards the bed, pulling her hair up in a bun on top of her head. “Besides. I don’t have any.” 

“Next time we dock, you should get some,” he suggested. She grabbed a datapad before crawling onto the bed next to him. 

“If you want, you should buy it,” she said. He placed his arm on her shoulder, pulling her close. 

“You smell fantastic. This what I smell like?” he asked, his smile indicating he was avoiding her previous statement. She rolled her eyes, snuggling up to his side. 

“I don’t know. I think it smells better on me,” she teased. He shrugged. 

“Probably does.” He kissed her head. 

“How much longer until you have to fly?” 

“I can stay awhile,” he said. She looked up at him, kissing him when he looked to her. 

“Good.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they deserve this


	25. Good Luck Charm

McKenzie was in her cabin, waiting for Tali’Zorah to come upstairs. Knowing Tali was safe and aboard the Normandy made Kenzie feel better. Ever since Tali’s trial last year, the two had bonded very closely, Kenzie even referring to the quarian as the little sister she never had. And now, she was an Admiral. Kenzie couldn't help but be proud. 

The doors opened, and Tali ran into her arms. They giggled as the properly embraced. “I'm so glad you're safe, Tal,” she said. 

“You too, Commander.” 

“Oh don't go formal on me,” she teased. Tali giggled. 

“Fine. McKenzie,” she corrected herself. Kenzie’s smile was wide as she pulled the quarian towards the bed. 

“Alright. How are you holding up?” Kenzie asked. She knew Tali was strong, but being in command could tear even the strongest people down. Tali sighed. “Hey… you okay?” she asked, placing a hand on her shoulder. 

“No...No I’m really not. Seventeen million lives are riding on me… and I don’t know if I can save them.”

“Tali, you’re doing everything you can. And I’m here to help however I can,” she assured her. 

“It’s just… I helped my father, and… Xen’s ideas? The new tech that made and invasion too good to pass up? That’s based on my father’s work. If they die because of me… if… if I don’t...” Her breathing became erratic, chest heaving. 

“Hey, come here,” Kenzie said, pulling her into another hug. “We’ll get them out of there safely, Tal. I promise,” she said. Tali lifted her head up. 

“I couldn’t do this without you, Shepard. I feel like I’m bluffing. Trying to convince them that the admiral’s daughter knows what she’s doing,” she admitted. 

“Not the admiral’s daughter. The admiral,” she corrected. She couldn’t hide the pride in her voice. Out of all the people she’s met over the last few years, Tali’s growth made her the most proud. “Besides, sometimes you have to bluff,” she said. 

“I know. And at least now, I can push back against the worst ideas. That’s why I accepted the position… And because of you,” Tali said, her voice growing quiet. 

“Me?” 

“When they offered me this position, I asked myself what you’d do. I thought you’d take the chance to make things better,” she admitted. She took a deep breath. “That probably sounds stupid. It’s just, I know I’m not really qualified for this...” 

“You are absolutely qualified for this, Tali,” Kenzie reassured her. “And thanks,” she added, her smile growing. Tali took another deep breath. 

“Alright, enough about me. What’s new in your life?”

“You sure you want to hear about it all?” 

“Of course I do,” she started. Kenzie gave her a knowing look. “Just start with Joker,” she admitted, a giggle leaving her mask. Kenzie matched her laugh, and brought her legs to her chest. 

“He’s here. He’s glad to have you back. Called you a good luck charm,” she explained. Tali got more comfortable on the bed, sitting cross-legged. 

“Shouldn’t you be his good luck charm?” Tali asked, her tone almost accusatory. McKenzie chuckled. 

“I don’t know crap about ship engines, Tal. If I were forced to work on the ship’s engine, we are all going to die.” 

“I see your point. But you two are good?” 

“Yeah… we are. I haven’t made it easy though,” she admitted. 

“What do you mean?” Tali asked. 

“This whole war is so stressful, and sometimes I take it out on him. Or he has to make me stop crying.” She sighed. “But he’s been there for me every time I need him. He’s been perfect, if I’m being honest.”

“Never thought I’d hear anyone call Joker ‘perfect’,” Tali joked. Kenzie laughed. 

“Trust me, I didn’t think I’d ever call him that either. But there’s no other way to describe it, Tali. Before we cured the genophage-” 

“Good job on that, by the way,” Tali interrupted. 

“Thanks,” she answered with a chuckle. 

“Sorry, go on.” 

“The Turians left a bomb on Tuchanka during the rebellions. Or… at the end of them. It was almost forgotten about until Cerberus got their stupid little hands on it,” she explained. She took a breath. “We got rid of the Cerberus troops, and made sure that bomb would never go off.”

“Good for you,” Tali said. 

“However, the turian Primarch lost his son. He gave himself up to make sure the mission was a success.” 

“Wow.” 

“I know. But, I come back to the Normandy, tell Primarch Victus his son wasn’t coming back. Go upstairs. Wrex comes up, and starts yelling at me for not telling him about the bomb. I lost it, Tal. Screaming, crying. Wrex practically ran out a few minutes later.” 

“McKenzie…” 

“I guess Wrex went to Joker and told him that I was crying. I swear, 5 minutes later, I was laughing and smiling again.” 

“Damn…” Tali said, relaxing her posture. “You always were extra giggly around him,” she teased. 

“Shut up,” Kenzie said, her smile impossible to hide. They both laughed, the moment of carelessness filling the room comfortably. “Besides, don’t think I don’t know that you went to go see a certain Turian before you came to see me,” she said, suggestively. 

“I did not. I definitely didn’t. How would you even know if I did,” Tali said, her voice quick and nervous. Kenzie laughed loudly. 

“I know everything Tali’Zorah… Everything.” 

“Keelah…” Tali muttered. Kenzie laughed again, pulling her close again. 

“I’m teasing!” 

“You’re evil,” she said, quietly. They pulled apart, Kenzie’s laughing slowly dying down. “Oh, by the way. Kal’Reegar told me to say hello for him.” 

“Aw. That’s sweet. He’s alright?” she asked. The elevator doors opened, and Kenzie turned her head  towards the cabin doors when they opened. 

“Last I heard, he was heading to Palaven,” she said, before also turning her head. “Hey, Joker,” she greeted him, her voice full of joy. 

“Hnn,” he groaned in response. The two women looked at each other. 

“You okay, honey?” Kenzie asked. 

“So tired,” he said, limping towards the bed. She looked at the stereo system on her nightstand, taking note of the time. 

“Wait, have you been flying this whole time?! When was the last time you took a break, Jeff?” 

“Shhh…” 

“Oh my god,” she said, rolling her eyes. He was in front of the bed. He leaned over, kissing Kenzie’s head. Then, he moved, kissing the top of Tali’s helmet. She giggled as he stood back up. He walked to the side of the bed McKenzie was sitting on, clumsily falling onto the bed around her. McKenzie shot Tali a glare, which was met with more laughing from the quarian. “Goof,” she said, taking the hat off his head. She heard him groan quietly. “Come on, Tali. Let’s let him sleep,” she said, standing up from the bed. 

“You stay. I have to get back to the War Room, anyway. If I spend too much time with you guys, the admirals might think I’ll put you before the Fleet.” 

“Alright. I’ll give you a heads up when we’re ready to hit the dreadnaught,” she said. Her head turned towards Jeff. “Definitely won’t be for a few hours, though.” Tali laughed again. 

“Sweet dreams, Joker,” she called out, leaving the cabin. He barely made a noise in response. Kenzie walked Tali out, then made her way back to the man in her bed. Carefully, she climbed into the bed next to him. 

“You’re in so much trouble,” she quietly teased. He turned over towards her, his eyes never opening. He pulled her close. “You should have taken a break sooner, babe.” 

“Sorry,” he said, his voice quiet and sleep ridden. He scooched closer to her. He pout his lips at her, then puckered them. She smiled softly as she kissed him. 

“Get some sleep,” she said. He nodded, the hint of a smile appearing on his lips. Her eyes wandered as he fell asleep, brown eyes focusing on something for only a few seconds before moving on. She laid there, her breathing slowing as she heard him start to snore. She moved her hand idly along his back. 

Realizing she could spare an hour or two, she carefully untangled herself from him. She found the datapad that controlled the lights, dimming most of the cabin’s lights slowly. She set an alarm on her omni-tool, then got back into bed. Jeff had turned over onto his back, and Kenzie laid her head on his chest. The sound of the filter on the empty fish tank, as well as Jeff’s snoring, filled the cabin. Her head rose and fell with his breathing. As she closed her eyes, she turned her head slightly, kissing his clothed chest.  _ You really are perfect _ , she thought to herself. 


	26. Messages

The Geth Consensus was more than Kenzie bargained for. The headache she got later that night was even worse. The Normandy would be returning to Rannoch soon, to hopefully put an end to this war between the Geth and Quarians. But, she didn’t want to think about that right now. She just needed to relax. So, she sat in bed, lights dimmed slightly as she read over multiple datapads. The pill she took to help her headache was slowly working, McKenzie feeling slightly more relaxed with each passing minute. Her terminal on her desk beeped twice, and she sighed. There would never be an hour she can relax to herself. 

She transferred the messages to one of the datapads on her bed. She read through the first one; a requisition order from Engineer Adams. Looking it over, she quickly realized she had no idea what any of it meant. However, her trust of Greg, Ken, and Gabby outweighed wanting to know exactly what she was buying. The three of them explained what the thermal pipes were at least three times each, and McKenzie was still a little lost. As long as it won’t kill the entire crew, she was okay with them buying. The order was approved, and she forwarded the message to Steve. 

The second message was from an address she’d never seen before, but it seemed familiar. Having a feeling she couldn’t quite shake, she opened the message. Her heart started racing as she saw the name at the end. _Hilary Moreau_. Her eyes quickly darted back up to the top of the message. 

“ _Commander Shepard-_  
 _Jeff is going to kill me for sending this to you, but he can try. I’m his sister, Hilary. Not sure if he told you about me or not.  
Anyway, he told me that you guys are dating. And as his little sister, I have to tell you that you’re an idiot for dating my brother. But, and you can’t tell him about this, thank you so much for dating my brother.   
We talked a few times while he was locked up or something after you stopped the Collectors. He wouldn’t shut up about you, went on and on about how perfect you are. I don’t think he’s ever been this happy. And after the first Normandy crashed, I didn’t think he’d ever be happy again.   
Since I know my brother pretty well, I’m sure he didn’t tell you how badly he handled the two years you were, well, dead. He was pretty messed up. I knew then that he was in love with you, but was too shy to say anything. Then he missed his chance. And then they grounded him. I told him to quit the Alliance, but he wouldn’t budge. Him and my dad are so stubborn sometimes. I’m starting to ramble, so I’ll just make my point. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to my brother.   
We’re not sure if the Reapers are going to get us here. After everything Jeff could tell us after the whole Citadel battle thing, I’m pissed no one listened to you guys. But, if anyone can get this shit done, it's you guys. Keep him safe, please. And keep the Normandy safe. After this war ends, I’m gonna go to flight school. Jeff can kiss his precious ship goodbye after I graduate.   
I hope I get to meet you soon. Jeff says you’re really pretty, and I need to make sure he’s not lying about you.   
Good luck,  
_ _Hilary Moreau_ ” 

McKenzie stared at the message. She read it again. Then she read it a third time. She felt her eyes water slightly, but couldn’t pinpoint the reason why. Maybe it was finding out what happened to him after Alchera. But she didn’t feel sad. Maybe it was because she felt accepted into their family, without having ever met them. Jeff and her had certainly been through a lot together, and he had to have told his family some of it. She read through the message again, her heart beating in her ears. 

She was about to call Jeff upstairs when she put the datapad down and took a deep breath. Her emotions were overwhelming her as she stood up to grab some water from the fridge. The elevator doors opened. Had she already been up here this long? How many times did she read that message? The doors opened and Jeff limped in. 

“Garrus is trying to have a pissing contest with Legion. And I thought my ego was bad-” he started, but was cut off. McKenzie quickly walked towards him, tears slowly falling down her face. “Hey, babe. What’s wrong?” he asked as she pulled him close. He wrapped his arms around her, felt her tears on his shoulder. 

“Nothing’s wrong. I’m just…” 

“Crying. For no reason?” 

She chuckled. “Not for no reason. It’s just not a bad one. I don’t think,” she explained. He pulled back slightly. 

“What the hell is going on right now? Also why are you still in your uniform?” She looked down at herself. Completely forgetting that she wanted to change, she looked back up to his eyes. Then she laughed. She threw her head back, her laughter filling the cabin. “Are you drunk? Did someone drug you?”

She slowed her laughter as she shook her head. “I…” she started. She felt a lump in her throat, suddenly unable to speak. She looked up at him, eyes wide. He watched her, confused by everything she’s done. His lips formed a smile, the smallest smile. She suddenly pulled his head towards hers, lips pressing to his. As quick as she kissed him, she pulled back. “I love you.” 

“I love you, too. McKenzie, what the hell is going on?” 

Deep breath. “I got a message from your sister today,” she said, her tone slightly nervous. His grip loosened, eyes widened. 

“That little shit is messaging you instead of me? Jesus,” he said, sighing. It was McKenzie’s turn to be confused. “I’ve been waiting for her to answer me for a week now. I was going crazy,” he explained. He walked over to the bed, Kenzie close behind. “Are they okay?”

“No Reapers yet,” she said, sitting on the end of the bed next to him. He sighed again, and she knew this was due to relief. He took off his hat, tossed it onto the desk. 

“Good. And since you still love me, I’m assuming she didn’t tell you any deal-breaking secrets.” 

“No. But if there are any…” she trailed off. He chuckled, then placed his hand on her thigh. 

“I’m going to wait until I do something real heroic, so you don’t really want to break up with me because I saved your life once,” he said. He moved back towards the pillows, his weight shifting the mattress as she stayed put. “What did she say?” 

“Can’t tell you,” she said, looking back towards him. He looked at her for a few seconds, waiting for her to tell him. She smirked. 

“Come on, Kenzie,” he pleaded. She laughed gently, shaking her head. “Brat,” he said, defeated. 

“She asked me not to tell. And I have to get on her good side.” 

“You two are going to be trouble. I can tell.” She climbed towards him, gently moving across the mattress. She was uneasy, still unaware of how she should feel. Her hands grabbed a datapad as she laid back next to him. She put her feet up on his, placing them gently on his legs. He let his head fall back slightly. His eyes closed, but opened when he felt her eyes on him. “Kenz, what’s eating at you?” 

“What did you do after Alchera?” she blurted out. He inhaled sharply, his body tensing up immediately. “I’m sorry. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” she quickly added. 

“What did she say about…” his words trailed off. He didn’t look at her, didn’t want to. 

“Nothing. She just said you… weren’t in a good place.” He sighed. She looked away, staring at the empty fish tank. She had curled her legs up to her chest. “I’m sorry, Jeff. I shouldn’t have said anything.” 

“It’s fine. It’s…” He sighed again. “I don’t want to talk about it right now,” he said, his voice quiet. 

“Okay,” she whispered. They sat there, neither of them saying a word. Seconds past, and they turned into minutes. She looked down at the datapad beside her, one finger dragging along it. Would he be mad if she started working again? Did he want to be alone? Did she screw up? She started to stand up, wanted to walk out of the door to escape the tension that filled the room. “I’m going to go downstairs and get some reports finished,” she said quietly. She took a half step, but stopped when she heard him sit up on the bed. 

“Please don’t leave,” he begged. She looked back to him. His green eyes were watering, his hand barely reached out to her. She nearly jumped into the bed next to him. She pulled his head to her chest, and he let go. Let go of the pain he hid for nearly three years now. She ran her fingers through his hair gently. He sobbed against her, his tears burning her skin. 

“I’m not leaving. Never,” she promised him, hoping he heard her. Tears started to fall from her eyes. “Jeff, I’m never going to leave,” she promised again. He kept crying, his breathing erratic against her body. She rubbed his back, arms, shoulders; she wanted to do anything to take away his pain. 

He eventually slowed, eyes no longer crying. His breathing was returning to normal. McKenzie held on, not wanting to ever let go. She brought them down to the bed, laying down tangled in each other. They laid together, the only noises were his quiet sobs that couldn’t be held back. She never let go of him for the rest of the night, even long after he had fallen asleep. She could barely sleep. She didn’t mind, though. He needed this more than she did. His chest rose and fell at a steady pace, his snoring quieter than usual. He turned over in his sleep, his back facing her. She took the opportunity to dim the lights. Curling up to his back, she wrapped her arms around his chest. Lips pressed to his shoulder blade. “I love you,” she whispered, then closed her eyes. She had no idea what he was going to say in the morning, what she should say in the morning. When she found herself finally drifting to sleep, she pushed her worries from her mind. They would have to figure it out tomorrow. Together. 


	27. Serrice Ice

Jeff woke up before her this morning, needing to return to the bridge. She opened her eyes, just barely, when he left the mattress. Instinct almost caused McKenzie to beg him back to bed, but then she felt his tears singe her skin. She let him get ready, pretending to be asleep. He kept the lights low, tried to make as little noise as possible. She had started to fall back asleep when she felt him kiss her temple. His lips lingered for a few seconds, and her heart raced as he leaned over her. He left the cabin slowly, and McKenzie struggled to fall back asleep. Eventually, she did. But she was awoken far too early by her alarm. 

The bridge was quiet and comfortable, but still missing something. Or someone. He had a weird hole in his emotions from the previous night. He should have talked to her, should have told her the truth. He knew she wouldn't judge him for falling off the map, wouldn't be upset with his not-so-healthy ways of grieving. But he chickened out.  _ Coward _ , he thought to himself. There was no reason to hide this pain anymore, but he still couldn't tell her. There would always be a lingering fear. 

His thoughts clouded his mind all morning, unable to focus completely on flying. Anytime he heard someone come up towards the bridge, his heart started racing. And when the doors opened behind him, he cursed under his breath. 

McKenzie’s soft footsteps filled the bridge. She quietly made her way towards the chair in the middle, carefully sitting down next to Jeff. She took a deep breath as she sat on the floor, her head falling gently onto his thigh. He sighed, one hand coming down onto her head. She looked up at him, her brown eyes worried. “Hey, EDI. Can you give us a minute?” she asked. Jeff pressed a few buttons, allowing the AI to take over the ship’s controls. 

“Yes, Commander,” she replied, standing up and leaving the bridge. His hand moved from her hair to her the top of her shoulders. 

“Did you get enough sleep?” he asked, taking his hat off his head. 

“Do you hate me?” she asked, quietly. His eyes looked down at her, then held back a laugh. 

“I couldn't hate you if I tried, baby,” he promised. She couldn't hide the relief from her face. “Now answer my question,” he added. She sighed. 

“Mostly.” 

“Kenz…” 

“I was worried about you,” she admitted. She moved her arm over his leg, fingers messing with the pockets of his uniform. “You needed a good night’s sleep more than I did.” 

“That's not true,” he said. He started moving his fingers along her shoulder, unable to keep them still. She looked away, trying to find one place in the cabin to stare at. Unable to find someplace, she looked back at him. He took a deep breath, then took the hat in his hands and placed it on her head. She giggled as she adjusted it, smile growing underneath the brim. “Shit that looks better on you,” he said. 

“Yeah?” she asked, the smile never leaving her face. He nodded slowly, green eyes taking in her every move. Her smile slowly faded when their eyes met, their stares rendering each other frozen. “I'm sorry I-” 

“McKenzie, you have nothing to be sorry for. I should be the one apologizing,” he said, cutting her off. She pouted her lips slightly. “So I'm going to do that right now. I'm sorry for falling apart on you last night.” 

“It's okay, Jeff. It's only fair after how many times I've done the same to you,” she said. His hat was slightly too big for her head, so she had to constantly adjust it to keep the brim out of her eyes. 

“Yeah, you do seem to cry a lot,” he noted. She pinched his thigh gently. “Ow, okay sorry.” 

“You better be,” she playfully threatened. 

“Seriously, though. You deserve to know what happened after.. Alchera. But-” 

“Hey, whenever you want to talk about it, I'm here. But you don't have to talk about it until you want to, alright?” Her lips formed a smile, a gentle reassurance. He sighed, the stress and tension leaving his body. 

“Yeah, alright,” he said, quietly. His hand cradled her cheek. “I am mad that Gunny talked to you before talking to me.” 

She laughed. “It's nothing personal. I'm just slowly winning over your family,” she joked. He chuckled. 

“I don't even want to know what's going to happen when you meet them,” he said. His small smile faded quickly. McKenzie’s omni-tool beeped. That thing was starting to ruin a lot of good moments. The last few good moments she might have. She reluctantly opened it. Her arm resting on his legs, she read the message quickly. 

“Dr. Chakwas wants to see me,” she said. 

“Don't keep her waiting.” 

“I know,” she sighed. She stood up slowly, her fingertips lingering on his uniform. “You're not getting your hat back,” she teased. 

“I will eventually,” he said back, his voice equally as teasing. She giggled, then leaned down. She kissed him, gentle and warm. He protested when she pulled away, his hands bringing her lips back to his. 

“You're the one who told me not to keep her waiting,” she said, after pulling away a second time. 

“But I wanna keep kissing you,” he whined, pulling her close again. She resisted, which was meant with another whine. 

“You can kiss me all you want later,” she said, standing up straight. 

“I'm gonna touch your butt, too,” he added. She rolled her eyes. 

“I'm leaving.” 

“Love you!” he said, loudly and dramatically. He heard her chuckle as she walked down the bridge. When the doors closed, he let out one more sigh, cracked his knuckles, and took back control of the ship. 

Kenzie walked into the sick bay, Jeff’s hat sitting proudly on her head. The doors opened, and Karin spun around quickly. “You rang?” she asked. The door closed behind her.

“I know it hasn't been a year yet,” the doctor started. Kenzie's eyes lit up; she knew exactly what this was about. 

“Serrice Ice time?” Kenzie asked, quickly. 

“Indulge my impatience, Little Miss Sunshine,” she said, a chuckle escaping her lips. 

“You grab the glasses, I’ll open the bottle.” They shared a laugh as they shuffled about the medbay, each of them focused on their assigned task. Kenzie poured two glasses, and handed one to Karin. “What did we toast to last time?” 

“I believe it was to Joker,” Dr. Chakwas said, raising an eyebrow. McKenzie’s face started to blush. “The hat’s a good look on you, by the way.” Kenzie giggled, unable to hide her embarrassment now. 

“To you, then. For being the best wingman we could have asked for,” McKenzie said, lifting her glass towards the doctor. Karin threw her head back, her regal laughter filling the room. 

“To you two, for  _ finally  _ getting together,” Karin responded. They clinked their glasses, then took a sip. 

“Wait, what do you mean ‘finally’? David said the same thing…” 

“Commander, I knew you two had feelings for one another while we were aboard the SR-1. I should’ve put money on when you two would get over yourselves and just kiss.” She took a sip, eyes watching McKenzie in amusement as the Commander dropped her lower jaw. “After everything you have put me through, I think I get to tease you a bit.” 

“You’re lucky I love you,” Kenzie said from behind her glass, taking a drink when she was done. Chakwas took another drink as well. 

“I love you, too. Our ray of sunshine is going to save the Galaxy once more.” 

“That’s the plan, at least,” McKenzie said. 

“Commander everything will be fine. I have so much faith in you,” she reassured her. 

“Yeah?” 

“Of course. I wouldn't have come back if I didn't.” Kenzie raised her eyebrow, then turned the hat around on her head so it faced backwards. “Alright, I would have joined no matter what.” 

“You love us too much,” she teased. 

“That I do, Sunshine. That I do.” 

They continued chatting and drinking, drinking and chatting. Laughter filled the medbay, something that desperately needed to be prescribed. McKenzie and Karin both had a satisfying buzz when they called it quits. The doctor made her way to the crew’s quarters, while McKenzie stepped into the elevator. When the time came to press the button to take her to her cabin, she pressed the button for deck 2. 

It wasn't late, but the CIC still seemed rather empty. She didn't mind, though. Walking past the empty stations was preferable while she was intoxicated. She hummed to herself as she slowly made her way up the bridge. 

The door opened and Jeff turned around. She giggled when their eyes met. “Hi.” 

“Here to return what is rightfully mine?”

“Mm. No,” she said, a smile forming as she closed the gap between them. 

“Then you came to admire the pilot,” he said, pulling his chair back slightly. One of these days, McKenzie is going to walk in, and Jeff won't remember to switch to autopilot before he turns his attention to her. 

“Of course I did,” she said, sliding into the chair in front of him. He chuckled as he slid his arms around her. 

“Were you with Chakwas this whole time?” 

“Yes I was,” she said. She slurred her words more than she would have liked. 

“Oh my god…” he started. She craned her neck and looked him in the eyes. She pouted her bottom lip, and he rolled his eyes. Kenzie simply laughed, the laugh of a drunk girl in the lap of her boyfriend. “Why do you guys always get drunk?” 

“We’re fun!” 

“Next time, I want to be invited,” he said. His fingers moved along her body as she moved, unable to find a place to stay still as she squirmed. “Sit still,” he said. She laughed and moved more. 

“Make me,” she said, looking up at him. 

“If you don't, I'm going to break something. And apparently, you got the doctor drunk…” 

“Hey, woah. She bought the bottle,” she corrected. She tried to sit still, but giggles kept escaping her lips. 

“You're lucky you're cute,” he said. He pulled the hat off her head, some blonde locks getting messed up in the process. They both tried to fix her hair. 

“You’re not invited. Ever. We wouldn’t be able to talk about you if you were there,” she said. 

“You guys were talking about me?” 

“Yep. About you. About us. I called her the best wingman we could have asked for,” she explained. She sat up, and turned around slightly in his chair. Jeff winced as he had to rearrange himself. “Ooh, sorry,” she quickly apologized. 

“It’s fine,” he said. He was getting frustrated with her, if only slightly. There just wasn’t enough room for a squirming drunk girl in his chair, but there was no way in hell he was going to tell her to leave. Her normally pale cheeks were red, her brown eyes seemed bigger, she wasn’t as tense. He watched her as she looked around the bridge, his smile growing. She needed this, she needed to let loose a little. Plus, she was damn cute when she was drunk. He took a deep breath. “Alright, come on. Let’s get you upstairs,” he said, reaching around her to a display. He pressed some buttons, then looked at her. 

“Mr. Moreau, are you trying to seduce me?” 

He laughed, then moved to stand up. “I think you should come upstairs with me and find out,” he said quietly. She giggled, then stood up from the chair. She looked at him, then bolted towards the door. “Kenzie…” he said, hoping to wrangle her back to him. The doors opened, and she started skipping down the bridge. The few crew members that were left watched her with eyes wide. She suddenly stopped, turned around towards him, then gasped. 

“I wanna try something,” she said, running back towards him. He rolled his eyes. 

“What now?” he asked, the frustration in his voice rising. She was in front of him, using him for balance as she… took off her shoes? Any annoyance Jeff had was quickly replaced with confusion, and curiosity. 

“Hold these,” she said, handing him her boots. He blindly accepted them. 

“What are you…” he started. She ran down the bridge again, clad only in her socks. She slid on her feet the last few meters before the stairs. Her laughter filled the CIC, and he couldn’t help but match it. 

“Holy shit, you guys gotta try this,” she said to the night crew. She stepped down the stairs, then repeated her action along the right side of the galaxy map. She couldn’t stop laughing. “I’ve always wanted to do that,” she admitted. 

“Now that you’ve crossed that off your bucket list,” Jeff started. He carefully stepped down the stairs, and limped towards McKenzie. She smiled big and giggled as she watched him. “Upstairs before I have to tell Anderson that you’re fired for sliding around the CIC.” He motioned her shoes towards the elevator. She huffed, but turned towards the doors. 

“You’re no fun,” she said. The entered the elevator. 

“I would have been fun if you invited me to get drunk with you guys.” 

“No one’s as fun as me,” she argued. He laughed. The elevator stopped, and the doors opened. He led her out. 

“Alright, change, then drink some water.” 

“Make me,” she said, again. The teasing smile on her face was just as sexy when she was drunk. Even if the two words were slurred together slightly. 

“Alright, I’ll make you a deal. You do everything I ask you to do tonight, and I promise we’ll have the best morning sex you’ve ever had.” 

She slowly moved towards him, hands cradling his face gently. “Mmm. Deal,” she said, kissing his lips quickly before turning back around. He was happy his bribe worked, his smile staying on his face as she drank a bottle of water in between her changing her clothes. She looked happy, which made Jeff smile even more. He knew that tomorrow would be back to the usual stress and tension, but her giggling and smiling tonight was good for both of them. She needed to laugh, and he needed to hear her laugh. He was doing everything in his power to make sure she stayed happy. So much so that he was getting stressed just making sure she wasn’t stressed. Knowing she was happy made him relax. He would have to thank Dr. Chakwas for making his job a little easier tonight. Also, because she was so damn cute when she was drunk.  


	28. Pajama Day

Jeff sat in bed, the blankets covering his lower half. McKenzie was snuggled up to his side, snoring as she slept. He couldn’t quite fall asleep, so he gently scratched her scalp, blonde hair running through his fingertips. As she slept, his eyes started to close, his own body needing sleep. But, as soon as green eyes closed, her face appeared behind them. Her face, glowing red, staring down a reaper. His eyes shot open. When he was reassured she was beside him, safe and sound, he took a deep breath.

McKenzie had done some crazy things while they’ve served together, but this one was hard for Jeff to just listen to over the comms. His better judgement kept him from re-routing the Normandy to the surface of the planet to pick her up, to make sure he could keep her safe. So instead, he listened. The Migrant Fleet picked up some video feed, but he regretted looking at them. He just fired on her command, sat there hopelessly as she stood too close to a reaper, to end a war. Damn, she ended a war down there.

She stirred beside him, her hair tickling his skin. He adjusted his hand, watched her sleep beside him for a few moments. She just ended a war, by yelling, no less, and he got to sleep next to her. When they first met, Jeff was surprised at how different she was out of her armor. Out of the Normandy, she was a force to be reckoned with, someone who changed the history of the galaxy. But on the Normandy, when she would spend her free time next to him on the bridge, she was… normal. She was only normal in his eyes for so long, though. The first time he got butterflies when he heard her walking up the bridge, he knew she was anything but normal.

He finally brought himself to lay down completely, sighing deeply as his back cracked. Even though she was snoring quite loudly, she still managed to roll over closer to him, her body laying perfectly against his. He got comfortable, the fatigue catching up on him. He managed to crane his neck slightly to kiss her head before he shut his eyes. He was going to be so tired in the morning. Hopefully she didn’t wake him up.

She kicked him only a few hours later. It was an accident, a safe assumption he made when he was awoken by a chorus of apologies. She covered his face in light kisses as he groaned. “Honey, I’m so sorry,” she whispered. Another groan.

“It’s fine. Just… go back to sleep,” he said, pulling her close.

“We gotta get up soon…” she trailed off. He opened one eye, closing it immediately when he saw her eyes closed.

“Yeah, but not right now.” She yawned. He chuckled, his voice groggy. “‘Mere,” he said, kissing her forehead as he wrapped his arms around her tightly.

“I’m so tired.” Her terminal beeped. In sync with each other, they both groaned. She turned around in his arms, reaching to the datapad on the nightstand. His arms wrapped around her waist, head falling to the crook of her neck as she read the message. “What do you want, Hackett,” she muttered under her breath.

“That’s gotta be illegal or something,” he said, his hands fiddling with the waistband of her shorts. Which were his boxers.

“Shut up.” She shifted her weight back towards him playfully. He hummed in her ear as she quickly scanned the short message.

“ _Hell of a thing you pulled off, Commander. Again. You guys doing alright?”_

_“I made sure everyone got a few extra hours of shut-eye. Myself included.”_

_“Good. We need you all at your best.”_

_“If only we could wear our pajamas all day. It would do wonders to our morale.”_ McKenzie snickered to herself as she pressed send.

“ _I_ _t's your ship, Commander. Do whatever you can to make sure you’re all 100%.”_

_“You’re playing with fire there, Admiral.”_

_“It’s the least I can do while you’re walking through fire, Commander. Keep me posted.”_

She placed the datapad down and turned back around to face Jeff. His eyes stayed closed as she rearranged in his arms. “What’d he want?”

“Just checking in. I suggested pajama day to help morale and he said yes.”

He chuckled. “Baby, you could ask for anything in the galaxy and he would say yes. And if he said no, you’d run to Anderson to get him to say yes.” She pulled back slightly, causing him to open his eyes. “What?”

“You’re a brat when you’re tired.”

“You woke me up by kicking me. You could have broken my… something,” he said. She huffed, and started to turn away from him. But, he caught her, pulling her close to him. “I’m kidding. I love you,” he said, quickly. Her lips pouted at him. “I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry,” he practically begged. Her hand came up to his head, running her fingers through his hair. Which was getting long enough that he had bedhead.

“I love you, too, Jeff.” She smiled at him, and he matched it. They barely held their eyes open, both of them still half asleep. “Alright, five more minutes. But then we gotta get up.”

“Ten minutes. Since we don’t have to change…”

“Mm. I love it when you’re right.”

 

Figuring it was appropriate for pajama day, James stood in the mess cooking eggs. Trading in his usual uniform for a pair of fleece pajama pants and a dark blue Alliance tee, he carefully watched over his pan. Ashley stood by the counter, eating the eggs he had cooked for her. She opted for a pair of Alliance sweatpants and a plain white tee instead of her actual pajamas. She looked around, noticing how many smiles were seen around the deck. “Leave it to Shepard to find a way to make this entire crew smile,” she noted. James chuckled.

“I had a feeling Lola had something up her sleeve,” he said.

“Wait, are those… varren on your pants?”

“LC, why are you looking at James’ pants?” McKenzie asked, walking out of the main battery, Garrus close behind her.

“Come on, Lola. These… pants are pretty great,” James said, a smirk on his face directed at Ashley. Ashley rolled her eyes and looked towards her Commander.

“Are you really wearing those?!”

McKenzie looked down at her body, a huge smile growing on her face. Her white tank top had a graphic of a hanar, pink shorts reading “Enkindle This” on one side. After Sovereign was defeated, Ashley had purchased Kenzie a set of Blasto pajamas. _So the first human spectre could wear the first hanar spectre on her tits_ , she had joked. James looked at McKenzie, laughing as he read her tank. “Of course I am! My favorite Gunnery Chief got me these.”

“That’s the second human spectre to you,” she said, scooping up the last bit of egg onto her fork.

“Do you think Blasto has a sidekick that becomes the second hanar spectre?”

“Sidekick?!” James and Garrus laughed as they listened.

“I’d watch out, Shepard. No one calls Williams a sidekick and gets away with it,” Garrus warned.

“And what do you think you are to me, Garr? And you’re not wearing pajamas…”

“Yeah, Scars. What the hell?” James asked. “Lola, you want eggs?”

“Ooh. Yes, please.”

“I’d watch out, Vakarian. No one defies Shepard and gets away with it…” Ashley said, giving him her trademark smirk.

“Well, someone around here needs to keep things professional. Besides, they don’t make Blasto pajamas for Turians.”

“And here I was thinking I’d finally get to see Garrus Vakarian out of his armor..” McKenzie teased. Garrus’ mandibles twitched, and he walked past them.

“I’m leaving before I have inform Joker that his girlfriend is flirting around,” he said, walking towards the elevator.

“Say hi to Tali for me.”

“Sure thing.” He stopped, slowly turning around. She jumped up onto the counter, an innocent smile growing on her face. “How did you…”

“What?” she asked, her smile growing more teasing than innocent.

“What’s with you humans and sitting where people eat?” he asked, changing the subject.

She shrugged. “I certainly sit where _someone_ eats.” James and Ashley burst out laughing, her fork clattering to the ground.

“Damn, Lola!” he exclaimed through his laughter.

“What… ah, forget it,” Garrus said, continuing his walk back to the elevator.

“Ask Joker what that means,” James said, turning his attention back to the pan on the stove.

“Do not ask Joker,” McKenzie said.

“You should _definitely_ ask Joker what she meant,” Ashley added, after picking up her fork.

“James are my eggs done yet?” she asked, a blush slowly forming on her face. Garrus laughed as he flipped open his omni-tool.

“Hey, Joker. Your girlfriend said something to me and I need you to explain what she meant,” he said, walking quickly towards the elevator.

“Eh. I didn’t really want to be the one to explain the joke anyway.”

“Huevos rancheros for one Commander Shepard,” James said, sliding the plate behind her.

“Thanks, James. Wish I could cook.”

“Finally, something you’re not good at,” Ashley said.

“No one’s perfect, Ash. I mean, I’m pretty damn close..” She was cut off by Ash’s groaning. McKenzie hopped off the counter, one hand picking up the plate. “Alright it may be pajama day, but I still have shit to do.” She started walking towards Liara’s office. She was about to turn the corner, when she dropped her fork.

“Yeah, pretty damn close to perfect,” Ashley called out. McKenzie bent over to pick up her fork, then walked back to the mess to get a new one. James looked at her as she walked towards him.

“What?” she asked, tossing the fork in the sink. She grabbed a new one, gave James a confused look, then restarted her walk to Liara’s office.

“Lola…”

She stopped. “What?!”

His smile grew. McKenzie had to admit he had a damn nice smile. “I didn’t know you had a tattoo.” The blush formed quickly in her cheeks.

“Wait, what?!” Ash asked.

“Thanks for the eggs!” McKenzie said quickly, then practically ran into Liara’s office, James laughter still audible through the closed doors. And as she waited Liara to finish her call, she could have sworn she heard James tell Ashley to ask Joker about her tattoo. But she knew he wasn't that stupid. 


	29. Rite of Passage

“How you feelin’, Commander?” Ashley asked McKenzie. The two Spectres stood in the mess, waiting for the coffee machine to finish.

“Can’t complain, I guess,” she answered, shrugging her shoulders. Ash got two mugs from the cabinet above her head.

“There’s gotta be something you can complain about.”

McKenzie chuckled, walking towards the fridge to get the milk. Her omni-tool beeped. After a long groan, she turned to Ashley. “This thing won’t stop going off. I just want some peace and quiet,” she said, flipping it open. “Oh, it’s just Jeff,” she said, quietly. She read the message quickly.

“ _Come to the lounge and play some poker with me and James_.” She was about to put the milk down when her tool beeped again. “ _And bring me another shirt._ ” She read the messages aloud to Ashley.

“This I gotta see,” she said, pouring two cups of coffee. Kenzie laughed as she topped the mugs off with milk. She put the milk back in the fridge, then eagerly picked up her coffee. Ash and her walked quickly towards the lounge.

“Bullshit,” Joker said, tossing his cards onto the table. James’ laughter filled the room. As the door open, Joker looked up, hopefully to see his girlfriend. And a new shirt. James quickly dealt another hand.

“Well, well. What have we here?” Ashley asked, laughter littering her question.

“What the hell…” Kenzie trailed off as she surveyed Jeff. His hat remained on his head, but little else covered his body. Shirt, pants, and shoes were on the table, in a pile close to James. “How are you this bad at poker?” James and Ashley both laughed, as he rolled his eyes.

“You don’t have another shirt in your hands,” he pointed out. She slowly walked towards him, brown eyes subtly taking him in. She smiled at him, a small smile. A smile only he saw.

“You got yourself into this situation. You gotta win it back,” she said, standing behind him.

“My favorite thing about my girlfriend is how supportive she is,” he said in his trademark dry tone. Her hand moved to his shoulder, gently moving down his collarbone, to his chest. She leaned over, kissing his cheek with a giggle. “No, you can’t make up for this by kissing me. I was in desperate need of your help-”

“Oh, please,” she said, cutting him off. Ashley sat down a few seats down from James, leaning back as far as she could.

“Don’t distract him now, Commander. I’ve almost got him,” James said, cards in hand. Kenzie peered over at Jeff’s cards. She looked towards the table, then back to his cards. “Ay, Lola. Don’t help him.”

“James, I’m no good at this either,” she said, taking a sip of her coffee. Ashley quickly sipped hers, as well. The two women eyed each other quickly. McKenzie was, of course, lying. She was extremely good at poker. Jeff, however, was not as lucky as she was. She wasn’t sure how much she’d be able to do for him at this point, but she was going to try.

“Her pretty face only got her so far,” Joker said. Kenzie scoffed, making them all laugh.

“Besides, James. What’s the harm in helping the little guy?” Ashley said, her smirk visible even from behind her white mug.

“Let me help him for one hand,” Kenzie said.

“Are we ignoring what Williams just said?” Jeff asked.

“Alright, one round. It’ll feel good to kick your ass at something,” James said.

“Can you hear me? Am I even speaking out loud?”

“Shh. Scooch over,” Kenzie said. He moved the rolling chair in closer to the table, allowing her to walk behind him and sit down.

“Brat,” he said under his breath.

“You love me,” she said, moving his hands towards hers. “Lemme see.”

 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” James asked. Kenzie stood up, empty coffee cup in hand. One round turned into two, two turned into six. She had successfully helped Jeff win back all of his clothes, and then some. James’s crumbled up shirt was in her hand as she started to exit the lounge.

“So, how does it feel to kick her ass at po-... oh, wait.”

“She played me!” Kenzie laughed as Joker stood up behind her.

“Aw, poor James. Got played by the pretty girl,” Ashley said, mocking him, if only a little.

“Commander freaking Sunshine just hustled me…” It was Joker’s turn to laugh. James stared down at the table, shaking his head slightly. McKenzie watched him, then looked at Ashley. She was not-so-subtly eyeing his exposed back. The two women made eye contact, and a blush formed on Ashley’s cheeks. It quickly went away, however.  

“It’s a rite of passage on this ship,” Ashley explained. Kenzie’s omni-tool beeped, yet again. She frowned as she opened it, still listening to James grumble on about his defeat.

“Hey,” she started, turning around towards Jeff. “Chakwas needs to see us both.” She turned back around quickly. She looked at James, chuckling when his scowl was revealed from behind his hands. “Glad you stuck around, Vega,” she said, tossing his shirt back to him.

“Yeah, whatever, Lola,” he muttered. McKenzie and Jeff walked out of the lounge, slowly making their way to the medbay.

“Thank you, McKenzie,” she mocked. “You saved the day, yet again. I can’t believe how lucky I am to have a girlfriend like you.” Jeff rolled his eyes, then pinched her side lightly.

“Hi, I’m McKenzie and I think just because I’m hot I can get away with anything! I manipulate people with my pretty hair and my ass!” he said, imitating her voice. She laughed loudly, clapping her hands once as they approached the door.

“I hate you,” she said, laughter still littering her voice. He smiled smugly and let her walk through the door first. Dr. Chakwas spun around in her chair, standing up quickly.

“Alright, you,” she said, pointing at Jeff, “I have pills for.” The bottle was picked up at handed to him.

“Yay,” he said, his tone flat, as he accepted the bottle.

“And you, Miss Sunshine, get this,” she said, picking up a small syringe. McKenzie groaned slightly.

“Is it already time for that again?” she asked, picking up the bottom of her shirt slightly.

“Yes, I’m afraid so, my dear.”

“What is happening?” Jeff asked. Chakwas cleaned a spot on McKenzie’s hip, preparing to inject her there. Kenzie turned to look at him.

“Birth control,” she said. The needle was pushed into her, and she winced. Her nose scrunched up.

“I’m not sure if I’ll be able to get anymore of this,” Karin explained as she pulled the needle back out. “So you two better be careful. There’ll be no childbirth in my medbay.”

“Can I leave now?” Jeff asked. McKenzie chuckled as she rolled her shirt back down.

“You better take your pill, Jeff,” the doctor ordered. “And I’m serious, you two,” she added.

“Yes, mother,” he said.

“Thanks, Karin,” Kenzie said as she started to turn around. Jeff followed, draping his arm across her shoulder. Then he leaned on her completely as she started to walk away. “Jeff,” she said, as she struggled to support him completely.

“I’m tired,” he said, chuckling.

“Oh my god, get off of me.” She was giggling as she tried to get him to stand up on his own.

“I have a disability. Don’t discriminate,” he teased. They made it through the doorway, their teasing heard by Dr. Chakwas even after the door closed. She chuckled to herself as she watched them through the window, McKenzie’s laughter making everyone turn their heads. It was true that McKenzie was Commander Sunshine, able to make anyone smile, her optimism shining through the darkest of times. But, Karin was beginning to see that the only reason she could keep that up was because of Jeff. She sat down at her terminal, beginning to type a message to Admiral Anderson. He would want to know that those two were keeping the Normandy running. And the crew smiling.


	30. No Pressure

Jeff stood up slowly when he read a message from Traynor. “ _Admiral Anderson would like to speak with you in the Comm Room_ ,” the message read. He made his way back, his legs moving slower than usual. McKenzie looked up from her terminal, a gentle smile forming on her lips when her eyes caught his. His smile was a reflex, his brain not thinking twice about returning the gesture. What his brain did come up with, however, was to walk along the other side of the galaxy map. He couldn’t be distracted by her. Well, anymore distracted by her.

“The link is all set up for you, Joker,” Traynor said, bringing his brain back to the present moment.

“Thanks,” he said, carefully making his way towards the doors.

“Tell David I say hi,” McKenzie called out, only looking up from her terminal for a second.

“Yes, ma’am,” he replied, only looking towards her for a second. The smile that he caught was well worth it.

He passed through the doors, waiting awkwardly to be scanned. He hated the scanner. Standing up straight without being able to hold onto anything was more exhausting than it should have been. But, he knew he had to do it. How else would they know that he was Flight Lieutenant Moreau, and not some Geth in disguise? The guards talked, but not to him. He was thankful for that. As soon as he was clear to enter the war room, he got nervous. And it was McKenzie’s fault. He never got nervous for briefings before they started dating.

He snaked his way through the cramped room, his hands using any available surface to balance on. The crew in there all chattered and worked, barely paying any attention to him. _Good_ , he thought. Then he chuckled to himself. McKenzie commands attention wherever she goes. People feel her walk into a room and they all stop and stare. He, on the other hand, could slip by completely unnoticed. Well, he might be able to if he could walk faster.

As he turned into the room that held the vid comm, he took a deep breath. The light was already flashing, meaning the closest thing his girlfriend has to a father was ready to talk to him. No pressure. He pressed the button to connect to Anderson.

“You let her stand in front of a reaper?”  _Fuck_.

“You think that was a group decision?!” Jeff snapped back.

“There must have been something you could have said to make her think twice,” he said, his words quick.

“I didn’t even have time. She just did it.”

“Figures. She’s stubborn as hell.” He took a deep breath, adjusted his hat slightly. “How are things otherwise?” he asked, his voice stern. Jeff always liked the Captain because there was no bullshit with him. Jeff was now terrified of Anderson because there was no bullshit with him, and he was dating the closest thing he had to a daughter. _Say hi to David for me_ , his mind replayed. She calls him David. The most decorated soldier in the entire fucking Alliance, and his girlfriend calls him by his first name casually.

“It’s all rainbows and bunnies,” Jeff answered, pulling his hat over his eyes slightly.

The Admiral chuckled. “Yeah, I bet. How’s the Normandy holding up?” he asked.

Jeff relaxed slightly. He could talk about his ship all day. “She’s perfect, as always.”

“And how is her Commanding officer?” Jeff inhaled sharply. “And don’t you dare lie to me, Lieutenant.” Shit, he was not holding back.  

“Well…”

“She’s not good… is she?” The worry in his voice made Jeff’s eyes snap to the hologram in front of him. Anderson rubbed the back of his neck, a sigh escaping his lips.

“You guys are asking a lot of her,” Jeff said. And immediately regret.

“You don’t think I know that? You think I’d ask her to do all this shit if I had another choice?” he snapped. Jeff’s eyes dropped to his feet. Another sigh from the Admiral. They stood together in silence for longer than either of them wanted. Anderson finally looked up. “She can do this. You know that, right?”

“Of course I do. But-”

“I know, son. I know.” It was Jeff’s turn to sigh. “She means more to me then you’ll ever know. I don’t like sending her into hell any more than you do.” Jeff fiddled with this fingers. “You know, Karin sent me a message. Said that McKenzie is really holding it all together-”

Jeff cut him off with a laugh. “Yeah, well-”

“I’m not finished.” The pilot gulped. “She was holding it all together because of you. Now, I know I’m asking a lot of Kenzie. Too much, in fact. But I’m asking even more from you,” he went on. Jeff was sure the confusion was clear on his face. “I’m asking you to make sure that she can save the Galaxy.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time she’s done it,” Jeff added.

“No. And it wouldn’t be the first time she’s done it with you by her side. Now, I’m giving you full permission to do whatever it takes to keep her happy.”

“Yes, sir,” he said, confidently. That was an order he would happily follow.

“Alright. I better let you get back to it, then. Thanks for taking care of the Normandy. And McKenzie.”

“Thank you for letting me.”

Admiral Anderson gave Jeff a quick smile, then disconnected the line. Jeff took a deep breath. Then his mind started racing. All he had to do was keep the most important woman in the galaxy happy. He took another deep breath. No fucking pressure.


	31. Reports

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know this hasn't been updated in a h*ck of a long time but thank you all for sticking with it (and me)

Jeff sat in Kenzie’s cabin, mind wandering slightly. His uniform was half on, his legs getting tired halfway through getting dressed. So, he sat on the couch, eyes taking in the mess that he helped cause. _Maybe I should clean some of this up and surprise her_ , he thought. The immediate throbbing in his knee said otherwise. He sighed. He could be the best boyfriend she’s ever had, if only there wasn’t a 99% chance of him breaking a tibia whenever he tried to do anything romantic for her. He surveyed the room once more. He figured the least he could do was try and keep it more clean than usual. His omni-tool beeped. “ _Where are you?_ ” the message from McKenzie read.

“ _Upstairs. Lounging. Someone’s here hand-feeding me grapes one at a time_ ,” he replied.

“ _Save me a few._ ” He chuckled when he read her answer. He sat back, stretching out his legs. The breath he was holding left his mouth and nose, just as the elevator doors opened.

“Haven’t you ever heard of knocking? I’m indecent,” he called out as she stepped through the doors.

“I’m in luck then,” Kenzie said, quickly making her way through the cabin. “Because that’s exactly how I want you.” Jeff’s eyes immediately shot up. Green eyes found her pulling the shirt over her head. He rearranged himself slightly, but was quickly cut off by her body straddling his. He caught a glimpse of her mischievous smile before she brought it to his lips. His hands found her hips, palms running over her exposed skin gently. They kissed each other fervently, shallow breaths barely escaping their lungs as their heart rates increased. Her hips started to move against his, the subtle pressure she was applying moving all throughout his body. She pulled back abruptly, flipping her hair out of her face with her fingers.

“Is this a bad time to tell you that I didn’t save you any grapes?” She couldn’t stop her laughter.

“Now I’m not having sex with you,” she said, leaning back slightly.

“Baaaabe,” he whined. She laughed again, the sound making him smile. He looked at her, taking in every inch of her skin while she giggled. There were goosebumps along her waist, and he ran his thumb over it. Her bra was red, and even Jeff knew it was too small for her. Eh, it was coming off anyway.

“We have a few things to do first, and I’m being serious,” she said, reaching over to pick up a datapad. He groaned, hands never leaving her sides to help her balance. “The Alliance needs a report for…maintenance. I think…” she trailed off as she scrolled through her messages.

“Then why did you come in here and immediately start kissing me?” he asked, hands roaming her skin. He heard her exhale loudly as his hands moved towards her breasts. She licked her lips, and closed her eyes.

“Because…” she started. Another loud exhale as his fingers started messing with the clasp of her bra. “As much as we need to get those reports done, all I’ve been thinking about all day was getting fucked by you.” He gulped. Kenzie wasn’t subtle when it came to sex, and that was going to be the death of him. He felt his cock starting to harden, her gentle movements on his hips becoming magnified.

“So let’s do the reports later,” he suggested.

“Mm.. no, we have to do them now. They were due last night,” she admitted.

“Commander Shepard slacks on her reports? Thinks about getting laid instead of saving the galaxy?” he teased. She chuckled.

“Well,” she started. Jeff’s hands moved down her back, fingers digging in slightly, making the journey rough. God, her skin was smooth. The toughest soldier he knew had the softest skin. A rush of adrenaline moved through him when he realized how badly he was distracting her. She might have been in control when she walked in the door, but he had her wrapped up now.

“Come on, Kenzie. No excuse?”

“I’m sitting on top of my excuse,” she said, arms wrapping around his neck.

“I’m flattered, babe. I really am. But we can knock out these reports before we get to the good stuff.” Her eyes met his, a confused look on her face.

“Wait, now you want to wait?” she asked. The smile on his face nearly double in size.

“Listen, I know this ship inside and out. I know what’s going on at every minute of every day, so answering some bullshit questions the Alliance has is going to be no problem,” he explained. While he spoke, his hands moved along her hips, stopping at the button of her pants. He somewhat clumsily fiddled with it, but managed to undo the button while keeping his eyes on hers. She bit her lip, chest rising and falling faster than earlier. “Start asking,” he said as he moved his hands to her breasts again.

“God, you’re going to be the death of me,” she sighed. He chuckled as she turned her attention back to the datapad. He grabbed her tits, wondering why her bra was still on. Didn’t he take this thing off? He quickly corrected that mistake. She allowed him to take off her bra, maneuvering that and the datapad expertly. “Alright… any major issues of concern with the Normandy?” she read.

“Yeah, the Commanding Officer is sexy as hell and is very distracting,” he said, mouth moving to her nipple. She was about to reprimand him, but all that came out of her mouth was a soft gasp. He sucked her breast gently, teeth brushing her skin ever so slightly. “No, no major problems with the Normandy,” he reported. He shifted his attention to her other nipple as she typed.

“With the many improvements we’ve made over the last.. Blah blah blah… has fuel efficiency gone up, down, or remained the same?”

“Up. That big ass gun that helped us kick the Collectors ass weighs us down a lot. Besides…” he started, his eyes looking up towards hers. “Someone has me stopping at the Citadel every 2 weeks to help someone new,” he said, lips immediately returning to her nipple. His hand gave the other breast attention.

“No regrets,” she said under her breath. She slouched down a bit, her stomach flush against his chest. “Any issues with the stealth system?”

“Not one.” His lips moved to the side of her breast, where he bit down and sucked hard. Kenzie let out a noise, not quite of pain but not quite of pleasure. His fingers dug in on her hip. He picked up his mouth, quickly kissing the spot. “Ooh, that’s a good one,” he said, admiring his work.

“Fuck,” she whispered. “Okay, three more questions.”

“Take your time, baby,” he said, pulling her down closer to him slightly. His lips found her neck.

“ _Shit_ ,” she whispered, more harshly. “In your professional opinion, when will the Normandy need major maintenance?” His hands moved to her ass as he picked his lips off her skin.

“I don’t know, a year? Nine months, maybe,” he said, lips immediately returning to her neck.

“Mmm, shore leave sounds nice,” she said, a shudder rolling through her when he started fiddling with the top of her pants, pushing them down lazily.

“Not if they mess with my ship.” He tapped her hip lightly, causing her to stand up. She typed his answer, allowing him to try and pull down her pants. Plain black panties exposed, Jeff took a deep breath. “God damn you’re gorgeous,” he muttered. His hands guided her back onto him, palms gliding along her thighs.

“Are you receiving resources you’ve requested?”

“I am. As long as my Commanding Officer remembers to put the requisition order in,” he said, grabbing her ass.

“One fucking time…” He chuckled, kissing the skin on her chest directly in front of him. He kissed his way back up to her breast. He sucked on her nipple as his fingers dragged along the top of her thighs. Her hips were circling on top of him, the few layers remaining between them too much for either of them. She stood up, pulling her underwear off without taking her eyes off the datapad. She filled in some of the answers she knew, and he stood up to unbutton his pants. As soon as they were pulled down, his hands found her hips and pulled her close.

“How many more questions we got?” he asked, then buried his face in the crook of her neck. She brought the datapad around his back, looking at it from over his shoulder.

“Just on- _ah_ ,” she said, Jeff’s finger on her clit cutting her off. Her knees were suddenly weak as he slowly rubbed her. He spread her wetness around, Kenzie quietly moaning while he did. She swallowed hard as she started reading the last question. “Do you feel the need for more maintenance crew members?”

“We’re fine,” he said, slipping a finger inside of her.

“Shit,” she moaned. She typed the answer quickly, his finger slowly moving in and out. Her head fell back as he inserted a second finger. “Fuck,” she hissed, furiously typing the last of her report. He bit down on her neck, immediately kissing the same spot. She threw the datapad onto the couch, then pushed him down onto the couch gently.

“And people were worried that we couldn’t be professional,” he said, smug grin growing on his face. She smiled, then straddled him one more time. She held his cock in her hand, her soaking entrance hovering above him. He groaned quietly.

“I don’t think this is really profession- _oh_ ,” she moaned as she sunk down on him. He loved this angle; she still was on top, riding him without holding back, but still close enough to pull her down for a heated kiss. The pace was slow at first, adjustments to their positioning had to be made. She settled her hands on the back of the couch, forearms connecting with his shoulders. His hands couldn’t stay still on her skin. She bounced up and down, finding a pace that satisfied them both, based on their simultaneous moaning.

“Fuck,” he groaned, bringing his lips to hers. Her bouncing turned into grinding, his cock hitting just the right angles inside of her. She moaned into his mouth, his lips muffling the sound. She moved faster on him, even if it was only slightly. She pulled away from his kiss, unable to hold back her moaning. The increased pace was sending her over the edge, and it was about to start sending him over, too.

His hands gripped her hips hard, fingers growing tired. Her tits bounced in front of him, the temptation of putting his lips on them all too strong. Instead, he looked up, watched her face as she got closer and closer to finishing. He got lost in her, his focus only on her mouth as it hung open. Her hair was starting to fall in front of her face, so she shook it back quickly. “Fuck… Jeff,” she moaned out.

“Come on, baby,” he encouraged her. He loved watching her climax, loved feeling her come undone around him. Her moaning got louder, and her head fell back.

“Oh, my.. _God_ ,” she moaned. His hands on her hips lifted her up and down when she stopped riding him. She whimpered as her head fell forward into the crook of his neck.

“Fuck,” he moaned out, the word leaving his mouth slowly. He slowed their pace for a minute, her chest rising and falling harshly against his. When she picked her head back up, she started to ride him once more. Her moans were louder, lazier. Her skin glowed; partly because of the orgasm that had just washed over her, partly from the light layer of sweat coating her body. His groans turned into grunts, huffs of air let out every time she sank down on him. She was impossibly tight after she finished, the added friction well worth the self-control of her finishing first.

It didn’t take long for him to reach the same end as her. His fingers dug in, hips bucked up. She slowed down to a near stop as he came inside of her. The cabin was only filled with the sound of their heavy breathing. His head fell back, and she chuckled as her arms encircled his neck. She leaned over, lips meeting his. He kissed her back, even though he wasn’t ready for it. “We should do this for every report like this,” he said, eyes still closed. She took a few deep breaths.

“I can’t even think of a reason why we shouldn’t,” she admitted, finally removing his cock from her. She fell down beside him, her legs on top of his thighs. She turned over on her stomach, her ass exposed to him.

“Come here,” he said, grabbing her ass lightly. She groaned, the couch muffling the sound. “Yes, come here and cuddle with me,” he begged, his voice playful. She laughed, turning her head slightly.

“Give me a minute to catch my breath,” she said. He chuckled, giving her ass a playful smack. “Stop,” she warned, her voice too tired to sound intimidating.

“Come here, you asshole,” he said, pulling on her leg gently.

“Listen, I have 4 more reports I have to do. You’ll get cuddle time later,” she said, waving her hand back at him.

“Do I get to help with all those reports?” he asked, the flirtation in his voice obvious. She giggled.

“If you play your cards right, Lieutenant.”

“You know I suck at poker.” She laughed, loudly. Turning around, she sat up and found one of his shirts and pulled it over her head.

“Well, then. You’re lucky you’re good at being my boyfriend. I might even say you’re the best at it,” she said, giving him another kiss.

“Mmm, thank… wait. You _might_ say I’m the best?” he asked. She laughed again, pulling her hair back into a ponytail. His eyes dragged up and down her body. _Fuck_ she was sexy. He suddenly didn’t care that he was supposed to be mad at her.

“Keep us both alive and you’ll be the best boyfriend I’ll ever have,” she said, walking towards the bathroom.

“Can do, baby,” he said to himself, mostly. The door closed behind her and he took a deep breath. He stared at the ceiling, thoughts drifting. He heard the toilet flush and it pulled him back to reality. Wait, wasn’t he supposed to be flying by now? “You really are too distracting,” he muttered to himself.


End file.
